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What would you do? daycare edition.


Forum: July, August & September 2012 Playroom

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  #1  
March 18th, 2013, 10:32 AM
Blessed.Life's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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So on Friday Micah apparently took a really big messy poo at daycare. When I went to pick him up she told me she had his outfit in a different room (note there was another teacher there at the time) and asked if she could give it to me monday. I thought that was weird but said fine. When I dropped Micah off I asked where the outfit was and the other teacher was at the front so it was just her and I. She told me she was so upset that the poo was everywhere that she threw the outfit away. The outfit was from nordstroms. I am obviously not happy. She offered to give me money for it and I didn't really say anything. On one hand I know she doesn't make much so I don't want to take her money but on the other that was a nice and super cute outfit and she could have just put it in a plastic bag and I would have taken care of the rest. My mom said I should tell the director if she doesn't pay but I don't know what they would do and if she got fired I would just feel awful. I can't imagine they would fire her for that but I just don't know. I just don't know if I should let it go even though I am furious about what happened or if I mention it to her again or if she doesn't say anything do I tell the director? I just don't want to be a b word but she does works in the infant room... isn't an explosive diaper part of the job? They even have plastic bags right there that they put the clothes in to send home... I really don't understand why she threw it away when it would not have taken much more effort to put it in teh plastic bag...
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  #2  
March 18th, 2013, 10:51 AM
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I would tell the director. I've worked w/ children for a while. Those who are good w/ kids, are not concerned about poop, puke . . . and def. could have put it in a bag.
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  #3  
March 18th, 2013, 10:56 AM
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As a teacher who has worked with 6-11 year olds, even I am not fazed by occasional poop/pee/puke accidents, and would never in a million years bin clothes belonging to a child - and have never met a teacher or childcare professional who has or ever would.

Completely uncalled for. If they don't pay for the clothes you should tell the director.
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  #4  
March 18th, 2013, 11:19 AM
afwifey09's Avatar proud momma to Ava Kay
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Oh my gosh, I'd be so mad! I don't care if its Walmart brand or Armani, the clothes aren't free! I'd make her pay!!

Last edited by afwifey09; March 18th, 2013 at 12:15 PM.
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  #5  
March 18th, 2013, 11:30 AM
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I would at the very least make it clear that that is unacceptable and you don't want anything thrown away without your permission again.

I got kind of annoyed a few weeks ago because Emily had a blowout at school and they bagged her clothes but forgot to put them in her bag and DH (who usually picks Em up) kept forgetting to ask for them so finally I went on on my lunch break to get them and it had been 3 days and the pants were pretty crusty. They still cleaned up just fine after pre-treating and washing though.
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  #6  
March 18th, 2013, 11:40 AM
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Yeah, I wouldn't make a big issue of it, but I would definitely let it be known that I wanted it handled differently in the future. If you do tell the director, I would be really careful to cover for the worker, even though it was a ridiculous mistake. I would make little of it and just say, "hey, it's not that big of a deal and I certainly don't want anyone getting in trouble for it, but this is what happened, just so you know, since you might want to make sure everyone is on board with your policy for soiled clothing." I wouldn't even mention names. It's an honest mistake, even though not many would think that way. I would never throw someone's things away, but I know others who would, if the mess was that bad.
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  #7  
March 18th, 2013, 12:15 PM
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Exactly what Kendal said. That's super frustrating.
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  #8  
March 18th, 2013, 12:29 PM
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Are you sure she didn't just take the outfit? Throwing it away seems so bizarre to me. I guess that's better than stealing the clothes off your baby's back though! I would mention it to the director.
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  #9  
March 18th, 2013, 01:03 PM
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oh heck no!!! i would be so PO'd!!!!!
i would def say something. I agree, i dont care if it was walmart brand clothes are NOT cheap and that is NOT acceptable!
I would notify the director that this is happening. as a low income mama i would be devastated if one of my good outfits for tuckr had been disposed of like that. other moms may have had the same issue but dont know how or are to afraid to say anything. i would most def say something even just to let them know whats going on. let them know you are not out to get her fired and you are happy with her work but this is one thing that she needs to be notified of that is not ok :/

as far as paying for it, that is up to you. if you want reimbursement thats your call. personally i would because like i said i am a low income mama, i really cant afford for his clothes to just be thrown away
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  #10  
March 18th, 2013, 01:38 PM
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I would mention it to the director. Anyone who works at daycare should have no problem dealing with poop or with poopy clothing. Throwing away clothes that were your child's is unacceptable to me. We don't have a lot of money so every penny we spend on clothes is precious to us. It needs to at least be addressed with the director to make sure that it doesn't happen to anyone else and you are compensated for your lost clothing.
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  #11  
March 18th, 2013, 02:36 PM
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Thanks guys! I am starting to think that I should mention it to the director... It's just she watches my kid everyday... I don't want Micah to get any less attention because of it! I just wish if she was going to do it it was a cheap outfit... why did she have to make it a pricy one. He has only worn the pants a few times since he just started fitting into 6-9 months too... I contemplated buying them for a good 20 mins since they were way more then I wanted to spend but would match everything and seemed so comfy. I didn't mean to make it sound like we have a ton of money, we don't! We are blessed to be comfortable and are able to meet our families needs. We are lucky that I can make splurges sometimes like those pants it just makes me sick that they were thrown out. It's just such a weird spot since like I said she has my baby when I work. I would hope that nothing I could do would change the way she treats my child but I obviously don't know that. It has also crossed my mind that she possibly stole the outfit. It was adorable...
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  #12  
March 18th, 2013, 05:11 PM
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I know where you're at - Before we had our nanny, I had a hard time being assertive at the daycare with people who were responsible for watching my son too. I'll admit, I'd give her the benefit of the doubt on this one and express my disappointment, ask that it not happen again, but not make her pay for it. These women hardly make anything as it is!
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  #13  
March 18th, 2013, 05:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mama4life View Post
Yeah, I wouldn't make a big issue of it, but I would definitely let it be known that I wanted it handled differently in the future. If you do tell the director, I would be really careful to cover for the worker, even though it was a ridiculous mistake. I would make little of it and just say, "hey, it's not that big of a deal and I certainly don't want anyone getting in trouble for it, but this is what happened, just so you know, since you might want to make sure everyone is on board with your policy for soiled clothing." I wouldn't even mention names. It's an honest mistake, even though not many would think that way. I would never throw someone's things away, but I know others who would, if the mess was that bad.
Yes, exactly.
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  #14  
March 18th, 2013, 07:18 PM
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So I told my husband and he said I need to speak with the director or he will because that is just unacceptable. I talked to my mom too and she said that the director is a director for a reason so to tell her but also tell her that I was hesitant to tell her since the person who did it is caring for my son. I just hate that she even put me in this position... I'll update you guys tomorrow :/
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  #15  
March 19th, 2013, 02:42 AM
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I hope it goes well, Britt. I didn't even think of her stealing the outfit but now others have mentioned it, well, you just never know.

It may be possible to tell the director without revealing the member of staff's identity or even just from the pov of "is this daycare policy, to throw away soiled clothes?" rather than from the pov of being angry about it.
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  #16  
March 19th, 2013, 08:03 AM
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I was a pre-k teacher for years but started out in the baby room for about a year. I think your story is very, very strange. Clothes get poop, puke, paint, food and mud on them all the time but you never-ever throw away anything. I would honestly be thinking...did THEY do something to it? Or steal it? I know that is a terrible thought but the idea they would throw away a poop clothes mess is just impossible to me. They would be throwing away things all the time! I dont want to get you paranoid, but that is so unprofessional and flat out wrong. I know its scary...dont bite the hand that feeds you...I get it no one wants the person that takes care of their baby mad at them but Im thinking there are other problems here if she cant even properly care for a dirty diaper.
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  #17  
March 19th, 2013, 01:03 PM
Blessed.Life's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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So I spoke with the assistant director who I have actually become pretty good friends with as the director was out. That made it a little bit easier. I told her I wasn't there to point anyone out but I was upset so I wanted to tell her something that happened on Friday. She stated "you mean (name of teacher?)" I was caught pretty off guard so I said yes. She stated because it is a daycare center they are required by law to report the slightest thing because if something happens if anyone witnessed it and did not say anything they would be held personally responsible as well. Another teacher had already told the director that the teacher was changing Micah's soiled diaper and was obviously agitated. She was told Micah was never hurt or in danger but just being clearing agitated is cause for concern when around infants. I was told they already have a meeting set up with her today as it is unacceptable. They were not aware however that Micah's clothes were thrown away. They said when we started daycare we had to sign a contract that stated anything list or stollen is not their responsibility; however, since it was admitted to me that the outfit was thrown away they will need to call the person over the region as they are not sure if they are then responsible to replace it since it was obviously not lost or stollen.

I am not going to lie I do feel pretty bad since I did not intend to say her name but I do feel great that a teacher had already said something. I like that my son is in an environment where that occurs! I just hope it isn't awkward between that teacher and I now... I did not intend for her to be pointed out I just thought maybe they would address everyone. I even told the assistant director this and she said I am just too nice. She stated they already have the meeting scheduled regardless if the clothes were thrown away or not that action just makes it worse. I just hope she doesn't hate me now
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  #18  
March 19th, 2013, 01:18 PM
Carwen*Angel's Avatar Fly away on my zephyr
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Honey, she has no reason to feel anything negative towards you - it was someone else who reported her - and WELL DONE THAT TEACHER.

You didn't even mention her name. And if she acts unprofessionally towards Micah as a result of this, you can at least be reassured that someone else will see that and call her out on it!
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  #19  
March 19th, 2013, 03:53 PM
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I am so sorry. That is unacceptable.

Because of all the crazy rules and red tape, we found a home daycare when Jessie was a baby. We never looked back.
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  #20  
March 19th, 2013, 04:33 PM
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What a nightmare. Daycare sounds scary.
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