[delaney24]

Just got back from my routine OB appointment & to be honest I'm not feeling too great about it.

Firstly we addressed my weight gain. I was on the smaller side to begin with & have gained just under 14lbs so far (approaching 34 weeks). That in itself apparently gives them cause for alarm, but what's really bothering my Dr is that in the last 6 weeks I've only gained 1lb. I have been eating like crazy to try to get those scales to go up. Deep dish pizzas, huge bowls of cereal with milk, ice cream...everything. I've tried high-cal, high-fat junk food (bad I know but my own doctor insists I try whatever it takes to gain), as well as high quantities of healthier foods, like nuts, hummus, whole wheat rice & bread, lean meats, etc. Nothing worked.

So, tomorrow I have to go for an 'emergency' growth check scan (35 miles away at 7:30am!) to see if this baby really is 'deprived'. I am happy for the opportunity to see him again & get everything checked out, but frustrated at the circumstances & what I feel is unnecessary drama.

My head swings between being so angry that my Dr (& now because of this, family & friends,) don't trust me & actually think I'd put the health of my baby at risk for the sake of my appearance, despite my fundal height being correct, and then on the other hand being genuinely concerned that something is wrong & I'm going to have a malnourished baby.

On the whole I guess I am glad for this scan though, because if all comes back well I'll have some concrete evidence to stop people in their tracks when they try to force-feed me by bringing over huge meals despite me having already eaten so much I feel sick that day. And if something IS wrong, then hopefully we still have time to deal with it.

Secondly, I am getting mixed feelings about whether my Dr is going to be supportive of my natural birth. I spoke to him a little about it today & he was great about some things (me going to the hospital as late as I wanted, no induction if waters break before labor begins if there are no signs of infection) and a little odd on others (seemed pretty against the fact that I have a doula, but explained this was because he'd had bad experiences with them). On the whole I REALLY like this Dr. He is VERY experienced, has a low c-section rate, and his persona is the main appeal (very calm, always listens & is great at keeping me informed. He also always says please & thank you & hugs me goodbye haha). But I think at my next appointment I'm going to push him a little further on the natural labor & delivery as I forgot to ask all my questions today, and see how he is then.

I don't think it'll come to this because it's so late in the pregnancy now & even if he's not perfect, he's probably the best I can get in the area...but has anyone switched Dr's at the very last minute?

[BabyLover]

I hope your growth scan goes well tomorrow and that baby is gaining weight correctly. From what you describe, no one should be doubting your efforts in the eating area!

I also don't think it's too late to switch doctors if you wanted.

[*AngieKH*]

I hope your growth scan goes well tomorrow! I can't imagine how awful it must be to have people questioning you about your weight gain. I haven't gained much this pregnancy and at my last appointment I hadn't gained anything in 2 weeks, but I had an u/s and her weight was good so there wasn't anything said, plus I was overweight before pregnancy, so I think this makes a difference somehow. I'm sure that your baby will be fine if you're eating so well!

[mommaof4andhalf]

No offense but you have some crappy family and not so good friends if they think you are shallow enough to put your baby at risk for your looks.

I hope your growth scan shows that you have a happy healthy baby who will just be small like his/her momma.

I never switched doctors although I wish I could have with my son. The guy was a class A jerk. I would look around and see if you can have a backup doc on standby just to be safe.

Good luck tomorrow and please keep us updated <3

[Mrs.Paradise]

I think you can fire your doctor ANY TIME YOU WANT TO!!! even while pushing... lol I heard of a lady that was in labor and fired her doctor! I think its awesome! lol

I hope your baby is fine... its weird how they have different weight gain from "normal" weight women to women who are over weight...

[MommaSunshine]

Im sorry you're dealing with this. Weight gain isn't a good indicator of baby's well being, or nourishment. Your baby will take what he needs from you, and you are still gaining some, so thats good! Your fundal height is on track, so I'd say thats a good sign The weight gain will come as it needs to, your body knows what it is doing, Im willing to bet he's perfect size
As for switching doctors, Im being forced to at 33 weeks because my doctor is leaving the practice. Im NOT thrilled about it, as I love my doctor and she knows me. I would quiz him some more at your next appointment and see how he reacts to your feelings/wishes. And maybe put your birth plan into writing if you haven't already, just to spell it all out for him.
Good luck!

[abur]

Good luck with everything! Who cares what everyone thinks. Honestly, if they have a bad opinion about you, screw them! You know that you have done what you can to make sure your baby is healthy. Hope everything goes well and everyone puts their foot in their mouths!

[**Jenn**]

Try to relax about your weight. You're doing all that you can and I hope the growth scan (though they can be off +/- 2 lbs) eases your mind. If its any help to you I'm of normal weight for my height and with my second I gained 14lbs total, my third I gained 13lbs total and right now I'm sitting at a 10lb gain. My second was 8lbs 5oz, my third was 8lbs 14oz, and this baby is always measuring right on track.

I've never switched providers in the middle but I think you can switch at any time if you find someone better. I'd give your dr. another chance and really talk to him about what you really want and see how he responds.

[bryan and nina]

Oh gosh, I am so sorry they are still giving you grief about your lack of weight gain. I dearly hope the scan shows everything is perfect with baby Max so that you can tell all those people questioning you to stick it! I agree that the baby takes what it needs from you! And you ARE eating! It's not like you are starving yourself!! This frustrates me for you because I really think it's added stress that you don't need. Hopefully this scan clears things up for the remainder of your pregnancy!

[starsandstripes]

ahhh (((Hug))) First off, try not to worry TOO much about the scan until tomorrow there was someone else on this very board who's gone through something similar and her baby had rolls **wub** (she may have responded already...I haven't read the responses yet ) ALSO, your fundal height is measuring proportionately so THAT is good! The GOOD thing is, you don't have to wait a week to get your u/s....you'll know something tomorrow morning! I bet everything is just fine! Plus, what if baby is just taking all your weight....that would be a good thing, less to lose later! ha! I'm praying that everything is just perfect with your little bundle! *and you!* Also just wanted to say that if you are eating like you should and you are FULL....I surely wouldn't push anything else Your body will tell you when you've had enough and obviously you have (((hug)))

[JillMama]

I am going to be 33 weeks tomorrow and at my 24 week appt I weighed 153.5lbs then at 28 weeks I was 152lbs then at 31 weeks I was 154 lbs, both under what I was at 24 weeks, now we're 9 weeks later with no weight gain, but my baby is FINE and I'm sure yours will be too Don't stress it, back in the old days when our grandmothers were having babies they got in trouble for gaining more than 15lbs the whole pregnancy, and our parents came out just fine (most of them, LOL)

[zubeldia]

Hi Delaney,

So sorry you're feeling under so much scrutiny and stress. Honestly I would not talk about my weight gain with family and friends if they're skeptical. Many, many women with a history of eds remain symptomatic throughout their pregnancies, and since weight gain/loss is basically the only measurable indicator of ed behaviours (however crude of an indicator it is) it's probably not surprising that you're getting push back from your Dr and those who are aware of your history.

With that said it must be infuriating when you know you have NOT engaged in ed behaviors, especially when you're doing all that you can. Perhaps you can keep a food journal to show to your Dr/nurse and ask what on earth you're meant to do to gain weight..

I don't gain a lot of weight when pregnant and I, too, have had some comments about my lack of weight gain. I understand and can empathize a great deal.

Many Drs don't like doulas for the obvious reason that they're designed to stick up for your rights and wishes, and that gets in the way (from the Dr's perspective), but so much research shows the benefits of a doula, so if he's super resistant then I wouldn't hesitate in going with someone else.

[doremi]

I can understand your doctor expressing concern about your weight gain, given your history of ED's... that is his job, to make absolutely certain that you are being healthy for your baby. However, it is not your family's business, and I wouldn't discuss it with them. As for switching doctors, it is never too late, but I honestly don't hear anything in your OP that would make me think it is absolutely necessary to make a switch.

[**Jenn**]

I must have missed the whole ED history. Anyway, I have that as well. I was anorexic for 5 years but have been healthy since a couple years before I got pregnant the first time (ended in m/c). I don't know if people think that I'm not gaining on purpose but as long as you know you're doing all you can than that's what is important. I'm a firm believer in that your body will gain what it needs to gain. I've gained minimal weight with my last 2 and this one isn't looking any different and I've had good sized healthy babies. I hope the scan today goes well!

[delaney24]

Yes, to be honest it's the ED history that has made me so worked up about this because even though I feel like *I* have done a good job of dealing with it this pregnancy, everyone else is still fixated on it. I know it's because they care about me & the baby, but it is actually counter-productive & having everyone else obsessing over the number on the scales makes it harder for me not to. I actually had to throw the scales & tape measures out of our house because I was getting back in to bad habits.

Aaaaanyway! I just got back from the scan, and all is perfectly fine! He is still head down, woo! His cheeks are immensely chubby haha...seriously...his face is wider than it is 'tall' hehe

They estimated his weight at this point to be 5lbs on the nose, which is about 45th percentile for my due date. All other measurements (head circumference, femur length, etc) were in the 45-60th percentile range, which is fine by me.

Looks like I'm going to have a very average sized baby, who is possibly a little long (she said his legs & feet were pretty big).

[doremi]

I'm so glad your scan went well!! Now you have peace of mind that you really are growing a healthy baby, and can tell everyone else to SHOVE IT!!

[cincy1luv]

Glad it went well!!

[**Jenn**]

So glad you had such a good scan! And yes, tell everyone else to just mind their own business. I think its pretty crappy that they'd think you'd risk the health of your baby for the number on a scale. I have to admit, those bad thoughts do creep back in my head from time to time and after I have the baby if it wasn't for the fact that I breastfeed and need to eat to keep a supply I can't be sure I wouldn't slip back into old habits. BUT, your baby's needs will trump those feelings and thoughts. I have no doubts you are being as healthy as you can be now and after baby is born as well.

[starsandstripes]

YAYYYYYYYY SO GLAD you got some relief in knowing your little man is a-ok!! He sounds perfectly healthy and I agree with Sarah...tell everyone else to shove it hehe! Yay! So glad your doing well and baby is too!

[zubeldia]

So glad it went well!