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discipline?


Forum: Traditional Parenting

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  #2  
December 28th, 2005, 08:14 PM
Ashes78
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Never worry about what someone else thinks. It's your child and you know what works for them. I used to spank the Zachs if they did something really bad. Now they are 9 and too big to spank so we take toys, games, etc. away. Now, I didn't spank them on a regular basis or anything..lol. They would get time out and things like that for minor things. I feel there are some times when spanking is the best discipline to use for that particular situation.
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  #3  
December 29th, 2005, 10:02 AM
jodi16ss's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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ITA - Don't let other people's opinions on parenting sway your decision. As a parent, it is your responsibility to decide how you wish to raise/discipline your children.

I believe in spanking when it is necessary. My husband and I use both timeouts and spanking when disciplining our toddler and plan on doing the same with our next child. Most of the time, Jackson has to sit in the chair, although if he won't listen or won't quit acting up, you had better believe he gets a spanking.
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  #4  
December 29th, 2005, 10:50 AM
~*Dina*~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I agree, its your child and your responsible for dicsiplining him/her. I also believe in spanking when necesarry. I've tried Timeouts and taking things away as well. Spanking is the LAST resort for us.
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  #5  
December 29th, 2005, 11:01 AM
wclark602002's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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spanking is last resort here but it does hapen,i dont beat em or nuttin,but they do get popped from time to time,only you kow what works best for your kids,theyre all different and need to be treated that way,do yourbest and be a proud mama
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  #6  
December 29th, 2005, 11:06 AM
amyla
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I have a stepson, who i'd never spank just because i'd probably be thrown in jail with CPS after me!! But really, with him (he's 6), the 'that toy is going to a boy who listens and appreciates it' works wonders!!

he'll do anything if you threaten the toys are going to goodwill. the thing is, you have to be willing to follow through and get rid of something. if it's just a threat, it's useless.

my friend uses that method and after her son lost a toy at the grocery store due to his misbehaving, he is an angel and only needs to be reminded. and he wises up because he knows his mother IS NOT kidding!! it WILL wind up in the garbage.

to some that may sound harsh, but i have seen it works pretty quickly. and for the record, i haven't had to get rid of a toy yet. i know that'd be hard, so i am thankful for that.
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  #7  
December 29th, 2005, 02:56 PM
kellybee's Avatar Veteran
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Oh, my! Like the guy I saw in Wal-Mart a few weeks ago having a "discussion" with his daughter (probabably about 5 years old). She's smacking him repeatedly in the face because he wouldn't buy her something and he's saying "Please don't hit daddy" over and over! Holy crap, I wanted to hit him!

Seriously, I've never believed that we need to be our children's "friends" in order to be good parents. And I don't believe a whack on the butt ever "psychologically damaged" a child. If I had to give my daughter a spanking and in public and someone said something to me about it I'd ask them if they wanted some of what she just got. It's one thing if someone's beating their kids, but spanking is a whole different issue. Yep, it's a last resort, but sometimes, you have to do it just to get their attention, especially when they're having some kind of meltdown and "talking" isn't getting through, KWIM?
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  #8  
December 29th, 2005, 03:31 PM
~Casey~'s Avatar GraceNorraJennaMomma
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My daughter is only three months old so I obviously don't spank her. I hope she is the kind of child where it won't be necessary, but you can not know that at this age. I was a "pleaser" and really never needed to e spanked becasue all my parents had to do was act disappointed and I was crushed. The one thing I have already learned in my short time as a parent is never say never. I was "never" going to bottle feed and that lasted about a week, and I have chilled out a lot on many things and found that what you think you're going to do is different than what you actually end up doing.
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  #9  
December 29th, 2005, 08:10 PM
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I have spanked my children, but as a last resort. When they're over the age of 3 I will warn them and say "if you decide not to listen to mommy, then you will get a spanking". The result, I rarely spank my children, the oldest ones are too old, but I really don't remember when anyone got that kind of punishment. plus when they're a bit older I don't think spanking is appropriate, there are other punishments that work better.
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  #10  
December 30th, 2005, 06:02 AM
wind_ryder's Avatar Super Mommy
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I don't believe in spanking. It's hard to say how I'm going to handle discipline right now since that's not something I'll have to deal with for a year or more.

Okay, this is going to sound silly but has anyone watched Nanny 911 or Super Nanny? I think I watched these shows a few times out of boredom but I actually learned from them. I don't agree with every single thing they say but a lot of it was helpful. I also found it more helpful than reading it out of a book. Although I must admit the families that they deal with are incredibly chaotic.
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  #11  
December 31st, 2005, 06:57 AM
tevinsangel
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I believe in spanking. I was spanked and it didnt damage my mind, esteem or whatever... and I was spanked alot. My DD is 4 1/2 and she gets spanked if she takes it too far. If we are in public all we have to do is look at her and say "ok, that's one when you get home" or two..depending on what the offense is. I don't argue with her or carry on a discussion in public about what she's done wrong, she knows what she's done. One thing my dad and mom taught me was not to use my hand when spanking. They always would tell me that hands are for loving and a paddle is for spanking. So, I keep a spoon at home for spanking... I don't do belts or thick boards (i.e. that's what got used on me).
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  #12  
December 31st, 2005, 12:21 PM
hopin4a4rth
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I was spanked as a child & am not messed up because of it. I used to believe in spanking. I don't anymore... my reasons are Biblical.

I don't spank, but I certainly am not like the parent in Walmart that kellybee mentioned. I set firm boundaries & enforce them w/ gentle discipline. I don't put up w/ mouthing off, hitting, punching, taking toys, and all the other stuff kids do. They still do it because they are kids, but we are teaching them not to.
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  #13  
January 2nd, 2006, 05:04 PM
JuneBug2006's Avatar Forever missing Gracie
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I believe that discipline has to be completed at the moment of the crime and not later.........

With my son, I have spanked him (not very often and not very hard), given him time-outs, taken away his favorite things, and that is pretty much it..........
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  #14  
January 2nd, 2006, 05:51 PM
.Amanda.'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
My daughter is only three months old so I obviously don't spank her. I hope she is the kind of child where it won't be necessary, but you can not know that at this age. I was a "pleaser" and really never needed to e spanked becasue all my parents had to do was act disappointed and I was crushed. The one thing I have already learned in my short time as a parent is never say never. I was "never" going to bottle feed and that lasted about a week, and I have chilled out a lot on many things and found that what you think you're going to do is different than what you actually end up doing.[/b]


OMG! I could have written the same thing, exactly!
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  #15  
January 2nd, 2006, 06:55 PM
CeiCei's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I believe in spanking but only when necessary and as a last resort. My 17 y/o was spanked, but it wasn't a habit and most of the time I let my voice do the discipline. Usually he would behave himself simply by giving him a certain look or deeping my voice to indicate how serious I was. That did the trick before I would have to spank him.
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