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Was this an over-reaction??? Behaviour issues...


Forum: Traditional Parenting

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  #1  
July 19th, 2011, 04:51 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
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Gaby has been SUCH a brat lately - last week she told me to "p*ss off" , and once when I was asking her to do something she rolled her eyes and said "blah blah blah"... she's been doing things like that, ignoring me, being rough with Emersyn and taking toys off her, speaking disrespectfully - basically she's acting like a 13 year old

This morning I snapped. I had enough in a BIG way. I'm wondering if the following 'punishment' is too hard - she's 5 in October...

I took all her toys off her - allowed her to choose three to have in the lounge, then sat her down and explained to her that we were re-starting her sticker/behaviour charts, and that her reward for good behaviour is that she can have more of her toys back - each two days she gets the required stickers, she can have one toy back... days with bad behaviour (ie doesn't get required number of stickers) I take one toy off her... a toy that *I* choose... Days that she has exceptionally good behaviour, I am going to allow her to bring another toy through to the lounge toybox.

Another thing she does that annoys the hell out of me right now, is just leave allllllll her stuff on the floor, no matter how often I ask her to put things away, so if she leaves toys that she's not playing with on the floor, and doesn't put them away after I've asked her three times, she will lose one toy.

So...... do you think that's too harsh? Or acceptable??? I sat her down and explained it all to her, we did some role-playing with regard to what is respectful and disrespectful when it comes to talking, and she seemed to get the idea. She was also SUPER well behaved for the hour before we left LOL...

I KNEW I should have just kept up with the sticker/behaviour/1, 2, 3 count that we were doing earlier in the year - that worked SUPER well, but when she started being really well behaved I just let it slip......

She starts school in October, and I really want her to have an idea of what is and isn't acceptable....
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  #2  
July 19th, 2011, 05:22 PM
Amaranth Dhanya's Avatar aka Hillarie
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I dont think thats too much.
My five year old would totally understand that(he turned 5 in June).
I think its acceptable to take toys from a child when they aren being bratty and they know it.
Im sure she's quite aware of her behavior even if she doesnt stop herself.
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  #3  
July 19th, 2011, 05:26 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Lotus View Post
Im sure she's quite aware of her behavior even if she doesnt stop herself.
this is why i've been getting sooooo frustrated with her - she doesn't act like this when we're at my parents, or when she's at preschool, it's just something reserved for good old Mum! I know it's to do with independence and control and stuff, but I'm quite ready to nip it in the bud!
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  #4  
July 20th, 2011, 06:43 AM
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Don't think it's too much.
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  #5  
July 20th, 2011, 07:40 AM
Amaranth Dhanya's Avatar aka Hillarie
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Ya my oldest(he's 7) is that way. I get the attitude and noone else. He does a bit with my husband but it doesnt last long.

Literally 5 minutes after DH leaves DS is on the move to being a butthead and treating me like dirt.
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  #6  
July 20th, 2011, 07:56 AM
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Richie is like this to me, too. He turned five back in February. I frequently get the eyerolling, along with a snotty "Whatever!" or "So what?", along with throw down temper tantrums, him ordering me around (a la "Get me a cookie NOW!"), deliberately failing to listen to any instruction I give him whether it's "Please sit, or you'll hurt yourself" or anything more serious such as reprimanding him for not using his manners.

I honestly think it's a phase thing that kids tend to go through, but even knowing that doesn't help much. He's a constant brat to me and me alone, testing his boundaries at every turn imaginable. If Kenny stands up (which we're easing into since it's a blended family and he's new to Richie) and says "You don't treat your mother that way" and imposes some sort of punishment (usually the corner or grounding to his room), Richie will kow to him with no issues whatsoever. Whenever it comes to me, though? God, he's such an utter brat.

I keep wondering myself where my nice, sweet, loving, attentive little boy went to. The only thing I can figure is to keep being firm and consistent, and after a while they'll get the picture and the behaviors will slowly start to disappear.
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  #7  
July 20th, 2011, 10:30 AM
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I think it's a great idea! Definitely not too much... and it's good for her to get the idea now.
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  #8  
July 25th, 2011, 03:49 PM
mylene169's Avatar Kaija and Kolbie's Mommy
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I don't think that's too much at all. I'd probably do that to my 3.5 year old if she pulled that with me. I will say though, this thread has me scared! She's already doing the "whatever" with the eyeroll DH and I don't do that...so where did she learn this party trick? Yikes!!!
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