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My DH and his dad have a really rocky relationship. When DHs parents divorced his dad moved across the country and they rarely speak or see each other. His dad even got married several years back and didn't bother to tell my DH or his siblings. Needless to say, my DH isn't a huge fan of his old man.
I can't say I blame him for wanting to keep his dad at a distance, but his dad doesn't even know I'm pregnant yet. I really want to announce it on Facebook, but his dad is a friend of mine on Facebook and I feel like I can't announce it on there until he tells his dad we are expecting. I don't want him to find out via Facebook. I just feel like it's awkward and kinda disrespectful, where he could even send a quick text to tell him personally.
Should I push the issue or just go ahead and announce it on Facebook? I really have no problem with how my husband deals with his relationship with his dad, but I would hate for this to drive the wedge between them even deeper. Maybe I shouldn't care, though. Obviously my DH doesn't and it's his dad...
Hmm that's a tough one. I'd discuss it w/DH and let him know you want to annouce on FB but you don't want to disrespect your FIL in any way so if he'd like to tell him first to let you know. If DH doesn't care one way or another then I'd go ahead and annouce.
Good luck!
__________________
Jenny
Married to Michael - 3/8/02
Mommy to:
Jacob (10) Matthew (7) Paige (5) & Liliana (0)
If it bothers you and DH doesnt want to handle it, I would send a short fb message saying just thought you should know before we make the fb announcement.
__________________
Bri, wife to Kirk, & mother of Aidan Troy , Callen Rhys,
[FONT="Comic Sans MS"][SIZE="3"][B]and introducing Julia Pearl!
I was originally going to say to talk to DH about it, but since he doesn't care, I like the idea of letting FIL know beforehand anyway (as long as DH doesn't care if you do that or not). Private FB message or text, whatever works, but I would at least do that. I agree, that if you don't do that, whether DH cares or not, it might drive that wedge deeper. I know you can't do much to make things better, but at least this way, you are doing what you can to prevent things from getting worse!
I agree with what others have said- I think it would be nice if you sent FIL a private message if you feel comfortable doing so. You don't have to write a long message- just short and sweet that you wanted to let him know he was going to be a grandfather again, and that you are about to announce on FB but you wanted him to hear it from you guys first.
I can kinda see where your DH is comming from. My mum was the last to know bc I just didnt care if she ever found out.
HAd she been a better person, I would have given her the courtsy she deserved. She wasnt, therefore any courtsy is given based on the fact that she is a human being...nothing more.
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Ugh. DH won't tell his dad. Dilemma...
05.24.2011
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