[Kelly]

Are you nervous about them being the youngest in the class?

Davey makes the cutoff by a week, and is DEFINITELY be ready mentally and academically, but I don't think I'm going to send him because I don't want him to be the youngest for the rest of his school life.

I've been SO torn on it though, because it would mean we don't have to pay the $200.00 a month next year since he'd be in public school, but I don't want to disadvantage him socially either, KWIM? I think it may be a bit different for girls though, lol! Girls aren't fighting for the "biggest" and "strongest" title through their school life.

[Smashley]

Kiera's that kid, and she is none the wiser. She fits in fine. Her age isn't an issue. The only issue I see, is that the teacher will access her at the stage where everyone else is, even though she is a lot younger than them. Most of them are turning 5, or are 5, and she JUST turned four. So, to the teacher her speech may sound off, but at her age it is just fine kwim? Otherwise, meh. My friend was the youngest in her class, and it never affected her in anyway.

[Kelly]

^ See I think it may be different for girls, I don't think I'd hesitate if I had a girl, but where boys are always picking on the little guy, etc, I'm hesitant to send him next year.

[Smashley]

Oh no no, Kids this age aren't that bad. Kiera is in daycare and in kindergarten, and they don't pick on people. The teachers (her anyway) are really adamant about teaching about "everyone is our friend" stuff. She is also in Catholic school, so that may be different. Kiera is super shy, wears glasses, wears a patch sometimes, cries sometimes, no one makes fun of her.

[cindymat]

I was always the youngest and you're right....i dont think its the same for girls.

Kelly-when is your cutoff??? Ours is August 1st, so C & R miss it by a month...but they are no where near ready anyway. But in all honesty...I'd probably send them if I thought they were (and they met the cutoff). I dont know whats worse...being the youngest or the oldest??

[glasscandie]

I think our cut-off here is September 1st or Sept. 20th, I can't remember which, but although her speech therapist said she would pass the waiver test for kindergarten with flying colors, we're holding her back b/c we have no idea about our living situation for the next two years (moving when we get out of military, then buying a house a year later when I'm done with grad. school). I don't want to start her somewhere and then have to pull her out.

I don't know how different it is for boys. Likely, I think Davey will be fine in the younger grades, he's always been so advanced for everything you've posted in the PR, and then when people actually start to care about those things, he'll have already found his "group." I was one of the younger kids in my graduating class, I was born in late Feb. and for some reason we had a lot of kids who were born in Sept/Oct/Nov in my graduating class in HS and it really didn't make a difference - just I had to wait longer to get my license than the rest of my friends lol I wouldn't personally care about social - if he's ready for kindergarten education at 4 going on 5, grab it.

[Tanya G]

I don't know I think you have a point with the kids picking on thing to some extent. Cohen already comes home from daycare telling me things I don't like to hear. Like how hardly any of the french kids will play with him. I told him how to ask them in french "would you like to play with me" and he said they still say no so he mostly plays with the english kids(there are only like 5 english kids maybe). There is a little boy who is french who is very agressive. He pushes Cohen all the time, and Cohen says the teachers dont notice. I dont want him to be a tattle tale so I tell him to just tell the kid to stop and not to push back... oh i dont even know what advice is right here. And then even the english kids some days decide its pick on Cohen day and they will all play together but tell cohen he can't play with them. And in all honesty I dont reallyl understand why!! Cohen is such a sweet boy, I know i am his mom so I am a bit biased, but I don't understand it... but then again, cohen will come home somedays and say he didnt play with such and such kid because it seemed they all decided it was pick on that kid day! So i tell him i dont like that one bit and that its mean and he shoudlnt do it. Am I creating a bullys dream over here!?!?

Anyway, I think kids can be very mean. Sometimes I think that what I am telling him to do is good... if only all the other parents were doing the same thing I suppose. but if the other parents are not saying anything to their kids, or dont know their kids are being mean or segregating or dont care... then yeh I guess I am just creating a bullys dream.

Amyway that was totally a tangent, sorry Kelly!! What I wanted to say after all of that though, is that I would send him anyway I think if I were you. Davey has always been a super fast learner, he will do fine academically and for the most part I bet the other kids wont even know he is younger. I actually have a very close male friend I went to highschool with, super smart guy, his birthday was in september. I never had a clue all those highschool years anyway that he was almost a year younger than me(me having a december birthday). How does he get along with kids as it is? He strikes me as a leader, so I don't think you have anything to worry about.

[LisaLisaBoBisa]

If it were ME I wouldn't send him. I had a few friends in school who had birthdays in august and they were girls and yeah they didn't get picked on but there were def times where it sucked for them to be the youngest. The cut off here is sept 5th so Ariana misses it and I know I can have her tested to go early but I'd def rather have her be one of the oldest in her class than one of the youngest

[Kelly]

Well, so far he gets along with everyone fine. We did have an issue with someone in fitness class calling him a baby, I'm pretty sure it was a kid from kindergarten enrichment class, I believe. The teachers dealt with it, but he was pretty upset afterward and wouldn't let it go for a bit. He's a bit sensitive in that area, he has randomly thought people were laughing at him, when they weren't.

I just don't know what to do. He'd be only 13 when he started HS. From what I've read, about this subject, most mothers who wait, don't regret it, but a lot of people do regret not waiting. I'm torn.

[LisaLisaBoBisa]

my stepbrother was one of those kids that ended up going when he wasn't 5 yet and I know my stepmom always regretted it. She did say if he was a girl it would be different but his maturity level wasn't the same as the kids he went to school with. What does your gut tell you? I would go with that

[glasscandie]

Originally Posted by Kelly

Well, so far he gets along with everyone fine. We did have an issue with someone in fitness class calling him a baby, I'm pretty sure it was a kid from kindergarten enrichment class, I believe. The teachers dealt with it, but he was pretty upset afterward and wouldn't let it go for a bit. He's a bit sensitive in that area, he has randomly thought people were laughing at him, when they weren't.

I just don't know what to do. He'd be only 13 when he started HS. From what I've read, about this subject, most mothers who wait, don't regret it, but a lot of people do regret not waiting. I'm torn.

I was 13 when I started HS. Actually, everyone I knew was 13 going on 14, they changed all the cut-offs recently, but back in the day I guess it was different. I was starting kindergarten at 4 going on 5, entered HS at 13 (turned 14 in Feb.) and graduated HS 3 months after I turned 18.

Originally Posted by Tanya G

I don't know I think you have a point with the kids picking on thing to some extent. Cohen already comes home from daycare telling me things I don't like to hear. Like how hardly any of the french kids will play with him. I told him how to ask them in french "would you like to play with me" and he said they still say no so he mostly plays with the english kids(there are only like 5 english kids maybe). There is a little boy who is french who is very agressive. He pushes Cohen all the time, and Cohen says the teachers dont notice. I dont want him to be a tattle tale so I tell him to just tell the kid to stop and not to push back... oh i dont even know what advice is right here. And then even the english kids some days decide its pick on Cohen day and they will all play together but tell cohen he can't play with them. And in all honesty I dont reallyl understand why!! Cohen is such a sweet boy, I know i am his mom so I am a bit biased, but I don't understand it... but then again, cohen will come home somedays and say he didnt play with such and such kid because it seemed they all decided it was pick on that kid day! So i tell him i dont like that one bit and that its mean and he shoudlnt do it. Am I creating a bullys dream over here!?!?

To the bolded - oh hell no I wouldn't be tolerating that! I'd be talking to the teacher, that's something he or she needs to address. Not just Cohen doing it, but when kids do it to him too. I have zero tolerance for bullying - I know I'm coming into this conversation with my own biases and worries about bullying RE: Julia's skin disorder, but "let's pick on so and so today" is just downright mean!

[AmyT]

Well, spencer misses the cut off by almost 2 months, so I don't have a choice but to wait another year to send him. BUT if he did meet the cut-off I wouldn't have any problem sending him, even if he was the youngest. I think in our school it was more the older kids that got looked down upon. People would tease them and say they must have flunked a grade...even when they didn't. I think there will always be kids teasing other kids for one reason or another (no matter how much we try to stop it) and I think you have to do what you think is right for your kid. I doubt his size will have much to do with anything personally. Like someone else said, by the time they start noticing stuff like that they will likely be in the older grades anyway, and already found their group of friends. Good luck making your decision!

[stephie1012]

Our cutoff is oct 1st. Kys bday is sept 30th, so she makes it by one day. We are sending her. As it stands now she is the youngest in her preschool class, and it hasnt been an issue. She is the same size or bigger then most kids in the class. None of the other kids even realize she is a year younger than them. Both of my brothers did an extra year at preschool and they all hated it. They are always the oldest and biggest in the class and everyday they have told me not to do that to kyleigh. They really wish my mom didnt keep them back. I would talk to his preschool teacher and see what they say. Kyleigh is totally different at school then she is at home. The teacher said it would be a disadvantage not to send her next yr just bc of her age.

[Rusha]

Well, considering my bday is 2 days before his, he won't be doing anything different than I did. I went to kindergarten when I was 4. I turned 5 two months later. Aiden is so smart, I think if I DIDN'T send him it would be worse because he would be so bored here at home. He's already smarter than a lot of the 5 year olds at his preschool.

[Lisa N]

brandon misses the cutoff but a few weeks, so it's not an issue for us. just my two cents, but i wouldn't hold him back if he did make the cutoff. i've never really understood the holding back thing either. kids will tease, i don't think it matters if they are a year younger. i guess since brandon will be the smallest if he went this year OR next it isn't an issue for me. he's on a basketball team with 7 other kids and is the youngest and smallest and all they kids are really nice to him and they get along fine. BUT you gotta do what makes YOU comfortable.

[Kelly]

I'm thinking more along the lines of when he gets older I guess.

I haven't actually called the school, but was told by someone the cut off date is September 31st, so I may be worrying over nothing, lol. Watch me call and he really doesn't make the cut off.

I guess my gut tells me no?

He's in preschool now and has a blast, but he was already able to write his name before they even started and most kids couldn't, the teacher was doing it for them. Like most kids in our PR, he's smart as heck and knows more than many 5 year olds (I work in a daycare room, so we see a lot of kids).

So I know he'd do great academically, but with the whole, boys maturing slower than girls and just the way things work in general, I'm nervous about his future school life.

I'm not really worried about early elementary, but (and I KNOW I sound kind of shallow when I say this) when I was in school, most girls didn't like to date or even get crushes on younger guys, so I'm afraid he won't find a GF in high school, and then there's the obvious, he'll be last to do everything, get his permit, his license, etc.

I sound awful... lol. *hides*

[glasscandie]

Meh, I think it depends. In my high school there was a kid who was really, really short. Like, midget short. But he had the best personality and he was a great asset to our ice hockey team, and consequently he was really, really popular and had girlfriends left and right. I think while some girls might date older guys, not all - there was plenty of inter-dating going on in my graduating class, and by the time you get to HS a couple of months between people isn't really that huge as when they are younger. Those aren't really things I'd use to make a decision as to whether I'd hold him back or not, but that's just me. You should go with your gut. I've read research that indicates holding kids back a year is actually better for them academically - they've followed groups of kids who started later, and typically they out-perform kids who started earlier in the same subjects. There are pro's and con's to both. I don't think there's a right or wrong decision.

[Kelly]

Yeah, I guess I'll just have to think about it more. I've literally been thinking about it ever since school started this past fall. I just don't know what the right answer is and I don't want to screw him up in any way, lol.

I mean, he'd only be 13 for a few weeks into the school year, but then he'd be a very young 14 while others are turning 15 and getting their permits and stuff. He'd have to wait a whole 'nother year for that.

Like this year, he turned 4 about 2 weeks into the school year and then a week later a lot of birthdays came and kids were turning 5, so even though he was only 4 for a few weeks in, most kids were already turning 5 at that point.

*sigh* I'll likely end up holding him back a year because I'm so unsure and from what I've read, there have been no "records" of anyone regretting that decision, but there have been many people who regretted sending their kids in when they were among the youngest.

I hate decisions like this.

[little_pockit]

you know, i really wish i would have held karin back a year. when she started middle school this year, she was 10. 10 with 14 year olds scared the crap out of me. she did just fine, but i'm so glad jacob didn't start til this year and jax will not go until the 2011-2012 school year. he may go to pre-k but i just don't know yet. my kids learn so quickly, i haven't ever been concerned about them being behind. jax can write quite a bit and read a few words, already. that is just from doing "homework" with jacob!

[Madeline410]

Hmmm. See, I WISH Mason made the cut off so he could go next year. I'd send him if I could.