[LisaB]

What is your bedtime routine like? I could use some ideas - I used to have the TV on for the girls while I put Ben down, which worked pretty well, but I'm trying to get away from that now just to limit TV. But since I made the switch, both girls have been demanding and cranky because I leave to put Ben down and they want my attention, and/or they fight with each other because it's almost bedtime and they're tired. Poor Ben gets read to and tucked in amid their yelling and crying and me getting up to break up fights or soothe tears. So I'm about to turn the TV back on, but I thought I'd ask for advice first from people who've been there!

I have tried reading to them all at once, but it's too chaotic - Ben zooms all over the place if his sisters are there to distract him, so he ends up not being read to at all.

[Erin80]

We've had a strict routine since they were both babies. In the summer we do dinner at 6pm, bath at 7pm, bed at 8. So at 8pm I bring Lexy up (DH puts Julianna to bed), brush her teeth, and then lay in her bed with her and read her 2 or 3 books. Hugs/kisses. Lights out. That's it. I'm very very VERY blessed with two kids who go to bed SUPER duper easily. When the time changes back in the fall, they'll be in bed at 7pm.

[~*Kixs*~]

We read to all 3 at once...it is a little hard with Nate b/c like Ben he wants to play. Sometimes he just plays with blocks at my feet while I read to the older one's.

Now that Kaylie is a strong reader so likes to read to her brothers. It is awesome and actually keeps both boys attention!!!

If Nate is particularly crazy some nights Jim will put the older two to bed and I will nurse Nate to sleep in the other room.

So we read, pray, hugs and kisses, and then lights out. Nathan stays up later than the other two b/c he still nurses to sleep. I tuck him in once he is asleep or he wont stay in bed. We are working on that one.

[RainyDay]

We all pile into Sean's bed and say prayers and sing some bedtime songs. Occasionally I'll read, but that just draws out the process and distracts them, so I don't do it often. Then I'd kiss Sean goodnight and take Tyler into his room and kiss him goodnight. For the past several months, Tyler has decided he doesn't like his bed, so he sleeps with Sean (it's a full bed so plenty of room).

[Twhylite21]

Most nights we both get the girls ready for bed and then DH reads to them and they say prayers. Then, it's lights off for Lily and Vi usually comes to our room and falls asleep there.

[~Michele~]

We do bath, shows (each boy picks one), books, teeth and bed.
We have done it together for most of Max's life which means that Max probably went to bed too late for a kid his age most of his life, even though they are both in bed by 7:45pm) but I did not want to do bed time twice. When max was really little, DH was usually home to split it but if he wasn't, Elliot would watch shows while I was putting Max to bed.

[*~*Jenn*~*]

We too have had a strict bedtime routine since babies. With the boys sharing a room, we have had to so they would both go to bed at the same time. Bedtime is 8pm on week nights, we let them stay up a little later on weekends, but I usually give then a warning that it's coming, we start cleaning up, read a story, and when I say it's bedtime, they're ready to go. Rarely do we have a fight about it. We too have been fortunate to have easy bedtimes with all 3 kids. My family always gave me a hard time about having strict naptimes and bedtimes, and following a routine, but we are really getting the reward from it now! Now I always hear "why are your children so well behaved at bedtimes, mealtimes, outings, etc?" and I always answer, "because of our routines since they were babies!"

[blondie-lox]

Phoenix - "It's time for bed." Phoenix then gives me a hug and goes to bed. She's awesome.

Lincoln - He usually gets his PJs on about 45-1hr before his bedtime (he goes down between 7:30-8pm) and when it's time for him to go down, he gets to pick 1 toy to bring to bed with him (there are no toys in my kid's rooms). He goes pee and then I put him in his bed, kiss him goodnight, turn off the light and shut the door. Done.

Both the big kids go immediately to sleep and don't come out until morning.

Fallon on the other hand doesn't sleep well. She's my worst sleeper x3875385. I don't even want to write out my night time routine with her because it seriously exhausts me just thinking about it. I will say this, she needs to be swaddled and then put into her Woombie, nursed, rocked/danced to sleep while I shush the crap out her. Then minute I put her down, she wakes up, I pick her back up and then start over.

[Effervescence]

Since the kids sleep in the same room, it's easiest to just do them both together. Daryl brushes their teeth while I get out jammies, we tag team with getting them dressed and potty etc. I ask each one of them one thing that they enjoyed most today, I tell them one thing that I enjoyed or something that made me proud of them that day. Then I disappear while Daryl reads books, they each pick one. Eve doesn't always listen to the story, but she is allowed to sit on her bed with her own book if she doesn't want to listen. That took a LOT of time to implement/enforce; she used to just run up and down the hallway, but over a couple of weeks she got used to it. Then on good days, I will remain hidden away and Daryl will sing them two songs, hugs and kisses, they each get a cup of warm water, lights out. BUT, most days I end up coming out of hiding to nurse Eve, then it is me who sings the songs, gives hugs and kisses, and lights out. Daryl enjoys playing the main role of putting them to bed since he really only sees them during dinner- it is his special time with them. In a couple of months I will start taking night classes and it will have to be all him, so time is ticking for miss Eve to not need Mommy to go to sleep!

[TripleAmommy]

Well, you're in a unique situation because your have two three year olds and they probably feed off each other especially close to bed time. I would use the TV at this time and try to limit at other times in the day. Or maybe try just playing a CD of their favorite music.
We put the boys down together. We read to them together, but Austin often just runs around during story time. He has never liked to be read to no matter what we do. After story, the boys finish half-cups of milk in bed and then I lie down with them until they fall asleep. We've recently started having them sleep in the same queen bed. It's working pretty well.

[LisaB]

Thanks ladies! Congrats on getting them to sleep in the same bed, Diana, amazing that you can do that with the age difference - sounds really cute too! Good idea about the music CD, I'll try that.

So. I think I'm going to go back to splitting up the bedtime. DH isn't usually home or available at night for tuck ins (read, either at work or asleep on the couch, he's been dubbed Couching Tiger, Sleeping Dragon). I really loved bedtime with the kids when they were split up, because a) it's my time to cuddle with them when I don't usually get that chance during the day, and b) it was working, they went right to sleep that way. Since the merge, it's been chaos. The reason is that Ben doesn't like what I read the girls since they're a different level, so he loses interest and toddles off to "read" his own books and pulls them all off the shelves in the process. I don't like the mess, & feel like he's being left out.

This was the routine that I had going that worked: We have dinner around 6:00, then pick up toys around the house. I switch on the TV and let the girls watch one show while I take Ben upstairs to brush teeth, read books, cuddle, sing a couple of songs and I put him in his crib. He's easy, I just put him down and close the door behind me. Then I go downstairs to get the girls, and we brush teeth & potty, they pick out their jammies & hop in bed while I read a book or two sitting between their beds, then it's lights out & I sing to them while they drift off. (I've tried many ways to get out of the room, but so far I haven't figured out a way that doesn't cause chaos, so I'm now resigned to sitting there. It doesn't take long, only 20 min or so.)

So, back to the TV? If DH was at home every night to help out, things would be easier, but things are what they are. I guess TV for a 1/2 hour before bedtime isn't the worst thing in the world. I wanted to cut out the TV because I've heard that TV can make kids not sleep well at night, and as you may know I'm having serious issues with that & Leigh. But I don't know that it's the TV's fault. I think it's more Leigh being a Super Cling lately in general. I'm going to try a music CD or maybe a quiet craft project for the girls while I put Ben down.

[Erin80]

Michele lets her boys watch a couple shows before bed, and I'm pretty sure they sleep well almost every night. If Lexy watches tv before bed (rare, but she used to when she was around 2 yrs) it never kept her up. Just do what works for you If I had to get a little one down and needed to occupy 2 three year olds, I'd FOR SURE be letting them watch a show before bed. They're occupied, out of trouble, etc. I think I'd probably get them in their jammies beforehand though just so that's one less thing to have to do.

[TripleAmommy]

I have heard that TV before bed is bad too - something about blue light.... Anyway, I don't think it's really ever affected my kids sleep though. I don't like it when DH shows them exciting/violent stuff before bed. The worst is when DH gets Austin when he wakes up in the middle of the night and lets him watch Elmo.

[alicia1984]

I wish I didn't work the 3-11 shift because I have no control over the kids' bedtime routine. DH isn't very good with it I don't think.

[LisaB]

I'm sorry you don't have control over the bedtime routine, that must be hard. If it's any consolation, I'm sure your DH is better at bedtime than mine! I think my DH has narcolepsy. He falls asleep reading to the kids, then they get up and wander around looking for me. That's if he even makes it to the bedroom. Sometimes, he falls asleep on the couch before he even gets to the bedtime routine. I've totally given up on him after 6pm.

[Effervescence]

Lisa, The two times Jonah is allowed to watch TV is before naptime (which goes EXACTLY how you described your bedtime routine!!!) and between dinner and bed. Before nap, he gets to pick what he wants- usually it's Dora, MAx and Ruby, or Bubble Guppies (I don't know what we'd do without Tivo!) and then before bed both him and Eve watch Peep and the Big Wide World/Pocoyo. I have also heard that it creates trouble sleeping, but honestly we used to not let him watch TV after 5:00 for this reason, and he was terrible to put to bed! The TV helps him calm his body and I think it also helps him focus a bit, so his mind isn't going a million directions. Since we've added Peep to our pre-bedtime routine, it's helped a lot. We usually do dinner, Peep, then get ready for bed

[LisaB]

I'm with you Jess - TV is a great bedtime tool! I just wish I could find Peep on TV (we watch it on the website). That would be a great addition to our DVR collection. Peep is the only show that all three kids like to watch.

[::MummyToThree::]

My kids have dinner at 5, bath at 6 and are in bed at 7.

I put them to bed separately unless DH is around.

If I am flying solo Ashton will go down at 6.45 and Summer just after 7. While I am attending to Ashton, Summer will read books herself or play quietly in her bedroom. Then I will go in and read her a story (or she reads me one) and its lights out.

[~Michele~]

Elliot has been watching a show before bed since he was 6 months old and it has NEVER effected him at bed time. Max got in on it around 1 year (he never sat long enough to watch a show before that) and he never had a problem either.
Do you have a TAG reader? You could let the girls "read" books with the Tag reader instead of watching TV.

[iluvgummies]

Originally Posted by blondie-lox

Phoenix - "It's time for bed." Phoenix then gives me a hug and goes to bed. She's awesome.

Lincoln - He usually gets his PJs on about 45-1hr before his bedtime (he goes down between 7:30-8pm) and when it's time for him to go down, he gets to pick 1 toy to bring to bed with him (there are no toys in my kid's rooms). He goes pee and then I put him in his bed, kiss him goodnight, turn off the light and shut the door. Done.

Both the big kids go immediately to sleep and don't come out until morning.

I hate you!! JUST kidding! Seriously though... How did you luck out? I know you said Fallon's bad, but wow.

Our bedtime is like this: Starting at 7:30 we go upstairs & I change Ella while Dom runs around like a mad man! On rare occasion he gets undressed, goes potty & picks out his pj's, but I'm lucky if that happens once a week. After both kids are in pj's I brush Ella's teeth while Dom does his (I know he doesn't do a good job at this age, but we have friends whose 5 year olds still don't brush their teeth so I figure something is better then nothing.). We go into Ella's room & I put her in her crib while Dom & I sit on the floor. I read one story that way. If they're in the right mood, the two kids can get very silly, but Dom knows that if he doesn't sit silly he gets no more stories and he's all about having three stories 'cause he's three. After I'm done w/ the story Dom sings her Twinkle, Twinkle and says good night. He then goes and says good night to DH or if DH isn't home he goes to his room and picks out two more stories. While he's doing that I rock Ella and sing her one or two lullabyes. Then I go into Dom's room and the fun begins. I read two stories, we say prayers, I kiss him good night. As I'm walking out the door he thinks of a dozen more things to say. I finally go downstairs. A few minutes later he comes down, he wants a snack & drink. We take care of that. A few minutes later, he's scared. He comes down again and we resort to threats... He refuses to sleep in the dark and I tell him if he comes down again we're taking the lightbulb out and he's sleeping in the dark. I'm sure it's totally wrong to do that, but it works every time.

Honestly, we didn't get to a relatively nice routine the start of this year, before then it was really crazy! The others are right though, you have three three and under, if tv is what it takes then go for it. But also if Ben doesn't get stories that's not the end of the world either. A calm, short bedtime is bette than a longer, more involved, but stressful one.