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Admitting to some awful things.....need help


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  #1  
June 10th, 2009, 12:46 PM
**Teresa**'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Ok so I have been in some what of denial about being pregnant. I haven't really told a whole lot of people and just kind of depressed about everything. So anyways..... I need to come clean about some stuff. I really haven't quit my bad habits. Which are (geez I am so ashamed to admit this) but smoking and drinking pop. I know pop isn't horrible but the smoking is bad bad bad. I just want to cry everytime I think about what I might be doing to this baby but I don't seem to put them down. Don't get me wrong I have cut WAY WAY back but I still have one to four a day. I have even talked to my doctor about the whole smoking thing and he didn't seem to concerned. He said it was good for me to cut back. WHAT!!!!! I was just shocked by that. I figured he would have read me the riot act for not completely quitting. So I guess I am hoping someone out there has some good advice for me to help me want to completely put them down for good if not at least for the rest of this pregnancy.

Sorry so long.
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  #3  
June 10th, 2009, 12:52 PM
~Paula~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Put them down and walk away, period.
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  #4  
June 10th, 2009, 01:10 PM
mrscheriezach's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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quitting smoking is extremely difficult. Congratulations first of all for getting down to 1-4 a day.

What did your doctor say? Just that it was good to cut back?

Smoking can cause many complications but you are getting to a lower number so just keep trying. Maybe finish a cigarette after like, 3/4 finished. when i had to come of my meds i would cut little chunks off the pills to minimize the withdrawal.

Nicotine gum is controversial during pregnancy but ask your doctor what he thinks.

I can see you feel bad about it but try to focus on that you are trying...how many were you at before? again maybe smoking 3/4 of a cigarette, then 1/2 etc will minimize withdrawal. just flush the other half down the potty or something so you dont feel like you have to finish it.

Good luck
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  #5  
June 10th, 2009, 01:30 PM
fishysticks's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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people have done much worse things to themselves while pregnant- that's for sure.

how about 30 yrs ago when women didnt know drinking soda or smoking cigs were bad? majority of people turned out just fine. My mom did heavy drugs while pregnant with me and i'm ok. My neighbor smoked heavily and I witnessed her drinking on a few occasions during her last pregnancy and her baby is perfect.

I'm not condoning or justifying- i'm just saying don't consider yourself a horrible person because of it. You've cut down- and that's a good start. From all i've read on the subject- if you even smoked before you found out you were preggo- the 'damage' is already done regardless of whether you quit or not later.

As far as soda? seriously, no biggie. Most doctors will tell you a cup of coffee a day to 2 cups (coffee or soda) is just fine.
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  #6  
June 10th, 2009, 02:18 PM
Snowpeas
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I had a co-worker who couldn't stop smoking when she was pregnant. Her doctor gave her a prescription for something (I can't remember if it was zyban or not) and it really helped her (made the cigarettes literally make her sick). Of course Zyban is a class C during pregnancy so it's hard to know what to do. ((hugs))
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  #8  
June 10th, 2009, 03:17 PM
monica8's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Well I'm glad that you feel comfortable enough to be honest about this with us and come here for support. Obviously smoking is not best for the baby and it is a good thing that you have cut back. I've actually heard that people who smoke a lot, then find out their pregnant, should gradually quit. The stresses your body are going through (both with trying to get over the need for nicotine and supporting the baby) make it more stressful on the baby if you go cold turkey. I think that's probably why your doctor didn't make a big deal about it. Granted I am not a doctor, and am a non smoker, so I would ask your doctor to see if that does hold any medical truth. Good luck with continuing to do any cutting back that you can! That definitely can't be easy.
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  #9  
June 10th, 2009, 03:29 PM
BellaBellski's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Paula~ View Post
Put them down and walk away, period.


I quit smoking 4 years ago. I know it's really really hard but it is sooo worth it!! Especially for your little one. Maybe you should read a list of the toxins in cigarettes, and compile a list in your mind and then whenever you feel like having a cigarette think to yourself "I will not expose my unborn baby to: the list"

I know you can do it
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  #10  
June 10th, 2009, 04:15 PM
~KMV~'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by midnightdreams86 View Post
a few things:

I had a friend who was preggo the same time I was with DS and she couldn't completely quit smoking. Her doctor told her to cut back and try to wean off during the pregnancy. He said that quitting cold turkey would actually have a shock to the baby.


My best friend, who has the same doctor as I do, is also a smoker, and our Dr said the exact same thing... so im sure it has some truth to it. as long as you are continually cutting back in the attempt to quit
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  #11  
June 10th, 2009, 06:30 PM
soninole's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My cousin smoked through her 2 pregnancies because she couldn't stop. Her doctor also told her that quitting cold turkey could shock the baby. Her children are both healthy.
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  #12  
June 10th, 2009, 07:37 PM
BellaBellski's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by **Teresa** View Post
Ok so I have been in some what of denial about being pregnant. I haven't really told a whole lot of people and just kind of depressed about everything. So anyways..... I need to come clean about some stuff. I really haven't quit my bad habits. Which are (geez I am so ashamed to admit this) but smoking and drinking pop. I know pop isn't horrible but the smoking is bad bad bad. I just want to cry everytime I think about what I might be doing to this baby but I don't seem to put them down. Don't get me wrong I have cut WAY WAY back but I still have one to four a day. I have even talked to my doctor about the whole smoking thing and he didn't seem to concerned. He said it was good for me to cut back. WHAT!!!!! I was just shocked by that. I figured he would have read me the riot act for not completely quitting. So I guess I am hoping someone out there has some good advice for me to help me want to completely put them down for good if not at least for the rest of this pregnancy.

Sorry so long.

... she's not asking for people to make it OK for her to be smoking still, but reasons to QUIT.
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  #13  
June 10th, 2009, 07:48 PM
Snowpeas
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There is some good information here:
Effects of Smoking During Pregnancy & How To Quit | BabyCenter

This is really good too. It shows that kids are four times more likely to smoke if their mothers did during pregnancy.
Kids more apt to smoke if mom did while pregnant | BabyCenter
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  #14  
June 10th, 2009, 08:12 PM
CriscoNinja
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Hey DDB, sorry I didn't see this sooner.

But I just wanted to lend ya some support...

When I was preggo with my son I was still smoking... I cut down to about 3 a day and by the end of the pregnancy I was down to 1 a day. After he was born via c-section (and was a healthy 8 lb 6 oz size) I was in the hospital for 4 days... I just sort of quit at that point. I was breastfeeding and it grossed me out to think the poor little guy would have to smell the cigs on me when he was eating... that's what finally did the trick for me. ((hugs)) I hope something clicks for you and you're able to put them down. It was the hardest thing I ever did.
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  #15  
June 11th, 2009, 02:33 AM
princesskate's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Hiya, I was just lurking here but I am an ex-smoker. I quit when I was 13 weeks-ish and I am so glad I did.

I had tried by myself before that but I failed miserably, so I got myself referred to a midwife who specilaises in stopping smoking. Do you have anything like that where you are? Maybe you could ask your OB/midwife?

What really put me off the smoking is when I had to blow into the carbon monoxide reader. Not only did it tell me my reading, but it told me what was crossing the placenta and getting to my baby too. I felt really sad but that helped me quit for good.

What also helped me quit was when she told me that everytime I take a puff on a cigarette that baby's tiny heart had to beat faster to pump oxygen around her body. I was terrified of my smoking causing a miscarriage so that put me off smoking too.

And someone once told me going cold turkey can shock the baby, well thats a load of crap. I asked the stop smoking specialist if it was true, and she said it certainly isnt. And carrying on smoking has way more bad effects on the baby.

Oh and dont be afraid to use NRT (nicotine replacement therpay) If you cant quit without it then dont be afraid to ask for it, using some form of NRT is way better for you and your baby than carrying on smoking.

Good on you for cutting down hun! I hope you manage to quit - I know how hard it is.
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  #16  
June 11th, 2009, 05:23 AM
mommy2Breana+Brandon's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I agree you just need to put them down and walk away.
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  #17  
June 11th, 2009, 08:11 AM
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My story is very similar to midnightdream's. I lost my dad to lung cancer when I was 20 years old, on 5-19-07. He was only 47 years old. He had been a smoker from a young age as well. You can only understand the pain a child (in my case I was 20!) goes through when they watch a parent suffer from this. It is unlike any emotion you've ever experienced unless you have gone through it. Not only the numerous negative effects on your unborn baby as people mentioned above, but put yourself in your baby's shoes...he's coming into this world expecting to have his mom around for a LONG time. You don't want to cut that short for him, really. Im not saying EVERYONE gets cancer from smoking, but do you really want to take that chance? Bringing a baby into the world means lots of change, and sacrifice. I know its difficult to quit, but theres help out there, lots of it. I would speak to your doctor more in depth about smoking, because I don't think its okay for him/her to be brushing that off..cutting down is good and I give you lots of credit for doing that but its very important for the health of that child and yourself that you do everything you can to quit..your baby should be your number one reason to quit, no one else can MAKE you want to do it, but that little guy in there would sure probably appreciate it! Good luck to you
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  #18  
June 11th, 2009, 09:55 AM
klt klt is offline
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Quitting any type of addiction is difficult. That's why it's called an addiction. I read that the effects of smoking in the bloodstream last 4 months after you quit smoking. Now is the time to do it! Low birthweight and other complications need to be your motivation. Yes, people have smoked during PG and their kids can be fine. But, scientific studies say it's bad. That means many other babies weren't as lucky. And, like others have said, you want to be around for your baby for a long time. And you want your baby to have the healthiest start possible. Your little one doesn't get to make the choices as to what goes into his/her little body. You make those choices. It's hard. And, I'm certainly not judging ANYONE who smokes, drinks, has 2 pots of coffee a day, etc... That's not my place. But, you asked for motivation to put down the cigarettes. You have it in you to quit. We know you can do it... For you and your little one. Let us know how it's going. KUP
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  #19  
June 11th, 2009, 10:11 AM
GinaS.'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I know how hard it is. I was still smoking at the beginning of this pregnancy. I just put them down (well, actually, I kept them in my purse - sort of like a security blanket) but I just stopped smoking. It was REALLY HARD, so trust me, I know exactly what your going through. It was extra hard because my friends, co-workers and hubby were still smoking too. But, once you really set your mind to it, you CAN do it! Trust me - I was a pack a day and now, just the smell bothers me. To make it worse, I was cutting out caffeine at the same time - I was pretty sure I was either going to die or kill someone. LOL

You already know the best reason to quit, and have all the motivation you need - it's in your belly!

Good luck and KUP. I'll be thinking of you - I was there not too long ago!
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  #20  
June 11th, 2009, 10:47 AM
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Girl I am with you. I quit finally about 10 weeks ago, but then about 3 weeks ago, I started back up. I am smoking about 5 a day. I just cannot figure out why quitting has always been easy for me, but staying away forever just seems impossible. This may sound terrible, but I don't want to quit yet. With all my stress's it just feels like it is all I have left. I know its not true, its just my head playing games with me. I smoked a few cig's a day during the last 6 weeks of my pregnancy with Collin, and had my last cig on the way to the hospital while in labor. I did not smoke again until after I had to stop breastfeeding.

I know if I weren't working and if DH wasn't smoking I wouldn't be either. I do not smoke in my home, or anywhere near my two boys. Yet, I cannot quit.

I totally understand the guilt as well. I mean I am already putting my little girl through hell between the drug program and the cigarettes... I feel terrible, especially now that I know this is a little girl, as I have wanted a girl forever now..
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