Know anyone who was circumcised as an adult?

HotTamale · #1 August 2nd, 2009, 06:55 PM

We're still trying to decide whether or not we're going to circumcise Patrick. My preference is that we don't-- I think it's an unnecessary cosmetic procedure, and I think his penis will be perfectly fine the way God makes it. But, since I don't have one, I told DH that the final decision could be up to him. And bless his heart, he's spent SO much time and energy researching the pros and cons and asking people why they did whatever they chose to do with their children. He is still on the fence.

As of today he says he's 50/50, but he's starting to lean towards NOT doing it, knowing that Patrick can always have it done as an adult.

He says he wants to ask two more people: his exgirlfriend who "has slept with more dudes than anyone" and can provide a well-informed female perspective (I think this is hilarious), and a guy who was not circumcised as a baby but decided to do it later in life, so he can find out if sex is better one way or the other.

We don't know anyone who was circumcised as an adult though. Does anybody?

viXen · #2 August 2nd, 2009, 07:32 PM

I don't know of anyone who had it done as an adult but my DH's mom for some reason decided to not do it when he was born, then made him do it at 7 years old!

I just asked him about it and he said he didn't sleep for 2 days because of the pain, he would stay in a seated position and only get up to use the bathroom. He barely moved around for a week and was terrified to pee.

Now the experience itself I am sure freaked him out, with him being young and all. But I just asked him what he thought and he said he would never recommend doing it while older.

He said picture going in and having some skin trimmed off your clitoris. It is going to hurt when you walk, hurt when you sit, hurt when you shift you weight, hurt when you wear clothes, hurt when you pee, etc. Things are going to rub together down there and make things worse. He said that it is also harder to keep the incision site clean, lint and things get on there and it gets irritated. He said it is much easier to keep the privates clean when they are babies rather than being an adult.

I don't have a preference either way with this topic, but I am just passing the info down from DH lol. He never talks about this but gave me permission to let you know his experience!

ingucis78 · #3 August 2nd, 2009, 07:41 PM

i sed yes from the moment we found out we are having a boy.but i still wanted my DH to make the final decision,because he is a guy,
and he was big YES.

My friend had her son fixed when he was 6 ore 7 i think.I dont really know the reason,but she sed he was not happy at all.

grace4me · #4 August 2nd, 2009, 07:44 PM

I don't know anybody but can only imagine that it would be much worse having it done later in life! OUCH is all I can say! I am cracking up about your dh's comment about his ex-girlfriend. That is hillarious!

Cheet_oh · #5 August 2nd, 2009, 08:04 PM

The lady who baby sat me's son actually had it done when he was 15 and was in excruciating pain. He would cry at times because it hurt so bad, he could barely walk and this lasted several days. I remember this happening when I was young and my babysitter had to explain what happened.

My uncle (my mom's brother), my mom told me was in pain for a while and he got his done early 20's late teens. Apparently a very horrific experience.

I have had both my boys circ'd as babies and the pain lasted a few hours to a day at most for them. I'm pro-circ, but ultimately it's a very personal decision. If it's not done as a baby, it's not a good idea to do it as a grown up, it hurts so horribly from what I'm told.

ChicaChels · #6 August 2nd, 2009, 08:04 PM

Sam's cousin had this done about...3 years ago? he was 24 or 25 at the time. his wife pushed him to getting it done and he finally gave in. he was down and out for well over a week if i remember correctly? He had said several times he wishes his parents would have had it done for him when he was a baby because he apparently got made fun of in the locker room and quit playing sports in high school his soph. year because guys were making fun of him...but that being said that wa quite awhile ago when circing was "the norm"...now i know of a lot less people doing the procedure so i wouldn't necessarily use the locker room mockery as part of the decision if i was making it.
I can't remember how Brett said they did the procedure..if he was knocked out or just numbed, but I do know he was in a LOT of pain afterwards. He said sex feels better being circ'd, but im not sure if that's simply because his wife is more comfortable with it now that they are..expanding their horizons? (He and Sam are really close and this became a super deep convo about 6 months ago while both boys were pretty drunk at a family gathering which is the only reason I know wso much about it!) but I have heard in tact guys say sex is amazing because of the sensation that is left.

pristineserendipity · #7 August 2nd, 2009, 08:25 PM

I'm stopping in from Sept DDC, but DH isn't circ'd and he wishes his parents did it. He's very self concious of it and I feel awful. I'll admit that I was a little shocked at first when I found out, but after getting used to it, it didn't bother me (opinion of the opposite sex) I know if we were expecting a boy he definitely wanted him circ'd. Also, my DH has had more UTI's that any other guy I've ever known. He seems to think its from being uncirc'd. I don't know if that is because a Dr told him that or just his personal opinion (he's deployed right now so I can't ask him more details)

silverlife · #8 August 3rd, 2009, 05:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sweet Dakota Skye

He said that it is also harder to keep the incision site clean, lint and things get on there and it gets irritated. He said it is much easier to keep the privates clean when they are babies rather than being an adult.

I would have thought it would be the other way around. Babies poop in diapers, and it gets all over everything down there. Grown men (hopefully) poop in toilets and it gets no where near their penis.

I don't (personally) know anyone who was circumcised as an adult. But apparently my husband's grandfather was circumcised as an adult and asked all his children to please, please circumcise their boys as babies.

I don't know the numbers, but if I were to take possible need for circumcision as an adult into account, I'd want to know how many adult circumcisions are medically needed vs done for other reasons (wife wanted him to, religious conversion, etc).

smilanatu · #9 August 3rd, 2009, 07:43 AM

I had my son done at birth and the pain really didn't last long. I don't personally know anyone who has had the surgery as an adult but I have read and seen medical programs that say it is highly more painful when you're older. Goodluck with your decision.

MamaAnna · #10 August 3rd, 2009, 07:51 AM

I don't know of any men that have been circumcised as an adult, but I give serious credit to any that have made that choice. It can make a baby so sore and uncomfortable, but they don't have to remember it. I can't imagine a man would ever look back on that fondly.

In a way it makes sense that it'd be easier to take care of a fresh circumcision with a baby than a grown man. A grown man is more likely to feel a need to adjust things which could cause irritation, they get a bit splashy going to the bathroom and don't clean themselves off, etc. A baby you can change right away and make sure that it is properly cleaned and maintained until it heals. An adult male isn't going to ask anybody for help and if they don't listen to the doctor's instructions because it hurts then it could make matters worse.

I had my DS circumcised for the health benefits. Quite frankly I don't want to think of what my baby's sex life will be like after I've died of old age. If we ever have another boy then he will be circumcised as well.

mbsn · #11 August 3rd, 2009, 08:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by regananne

and a guy who was not circumcised as a baby but decided to do it later in life, so he can find out if sex is better one way or the other.

Just my two cents, but I don't think this information is going to be especially useful coming from just one guy. If the guy says sex is better, is that because he ended up with better partners when he was older? Because he himself got better at sex when he was older? Because sex was different all of the sudden? Sex with a newly circumcised penis probably feels different than sex with a penis that was circumcised right after birth. You also need to consider *why* the guy got it done later in life. Was he having issues, which most uncircumcised men don't have, that were affecting his sexual enjoyment? Did he get it done for cosmetic reasons which resulted in a confidence boost and therefore better sex?

sethsgirl · #12 August 3rd, 2009, 09:30 AM

I don't know anyone circumcised as an adult but we aren't having Brycen circumcised, DH and I both agree that it is an unnecessary cosmetic procedure. My DH isn't and he's never had any problems and he told me that just about all of the guys in his family aren't and none of them have ever had problems either. I don't know if the sex is any better if they are or aren't since I've only slept with DH but from what I've heard from other peopl it's better if they aren't. It's a very personal decision but I think that's good that your DH is researching it rather then just saying yes or no.

WhoaMomma! · #13 August 3rd, 2009, 09:34 AM

My mom started out her OB career as an airforce doc, and she had to perform circumcisions on grown men. Back then (not sure if it's still that way today?) men had to be circ'd to join....I THINK she said b/c of the fear of infection during jungle warfare or something like that (we're talking back in the 70's here). She said it was the most horrific experience of her life - much less theirs. They knocked them out, but it didn't matter. Touch your husband's penis while he's asleep - it still moves. She said even under heavy sedation (IV - not general anesthesia), the men would groan or cry out during the procedure. The penis would change size and position while they were trying to cut on it, which made it take a lot longer than a quick snip on a baby. And she said that for about a week after the procedure, the men would wake up in the middle of the night screaming and have to be restrained and/or sedated b/c the poor things would get an erection in their sleep and bust open the incision.

I also asked my husband about the "in tact men have better sex" theory when we were discussing circ'ing for our baby (before we found out she was a girl). I was trying really hard to play devil's advocate because I didn't want anyone blaming me for imposing my religious views on him. Anyway he looked at me like I was the stupidest woman in the world and said "yeah b/c so many men are running around complaining that sex isn't pleasurable or they just last too dang long in bed. IF ONLY I was more sensitive and could enjoy it." He told me - much what some pp have pointed out - that the quality of sex is determined by how much effort you put into it, how comfortable you are with your partner, how adventurous she is, whether or not there is a strong emotional connection, whether or not you are stressed out, whether or not she stimulates him mentally, etc. Whether or not he has foreskin may be one of those factors, but it isn't going to be the end-all-be-all determining factor as to whether or not a man has a good sex life.

I will conclude with some potentially irrelevant information.

A friend of mine has an 18 yo son with down's syndrome. They are Sioux Indian (as in lived on a reservation until about 10 years ago), so he is not circ'd. I would estimate that he probably has either a UTI or some other type of infection at least every 6 months. Now I know that his case is probably unique b/c most grown men are probably better able to care for themselves. But I do think it shows that infection CAN result in an uncirc'd penis if hygiene should ever become an issue. And I had 3 brothers. From age 8-14, hygiene was always an issue

That's the age where they thought jumping in the bay after fishing for 14 hours was a sufficient replacement for a shower.

LisaMarie! · #14 August 3rd, 2009, 09:38 AM

Lurking...
My older sister and her boyfriend came and visited me at the hospital when I had my son. We had already decided to do it and we will with this baby boy too. He asked me if we were going to have him circumcised and we told him yes. He said good because he had a friend who did it as an adult and he almost died from it. I didn't ask a lot of questions about this.

*Candi* · #15 August 3rd, 2009, 09:46 AM

One of my exes was uncircd and I know he was always very self concscious about it.... he once told me that in all the sports he played and growing up he never saw another uncircd guy.... He was considering getting circd a few years ago but as yet has not done it... (we're still pretty close and had some long discussions about it so I think I've heard a lot of pros and cons.....) I'm pretty sure the main reason he hasnt done it though is because of the pain factor.

I told Dh that it was his decision what we do and he has decided to circ, which is fine with me. I am not really pro one way or the other, I think everyone just has to decide what is best for them. I do think that people need to consider the emotional aspects of things too though as I saw what my ex went through, and lets face it, kids can be brutally mean.

Good luck and I hope you are able to find the info you are looking for!

hotjai21 · #16 August 3rd, 2009, 10:13 AM

I have no advice I just have to LOL at him wanting to ask his ex- since he knows shes had plenty of experience with both sides!! HAHA!!

sethsgirl · #17 August 3rd, 2009, 10:30 AM

I have to say for the guys that feel self concious about it that's not how they all feel. DH says he's never felt that way not in high school or now in the Navy. He knows a few guys that aren't cut but really no one cares. Infact I'm pretty sure the only thing they talk about or compair is the size lol go figure! As for hygine and infections...if you don't get your son cut then just have your pedi, once your son is old enough, show you how to clean it and then when he's older either you tell him or have your DH show him. It really isn't a big deal to take the extra 2 seconds if that to clean the area. I kind of feel like people are trying to talk you into gettng your son cut so I just want you to keep in mind that just because one person says someone almost died because he wasn't cut or someone that someone knows gets all of these infections doesn't really mean anything. I'm sure there are plenty of guys that are cut that get lots of infections too or have other issues.

wifey2kevin · #18 August 3rd, 2009, 11:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sethsgirl

I have to say for the guys that feel self concious about it that's not how they all feel. DH says he's never felt that way not in high school or now in the Navy. He knows a few guys that aren't cut but really no one cares. Infact I'm pretty sure the only thing they talk about or compair is the size lol go figure! As for hygine and infections...if you don't get your son cut then just have your pedi, once your son is old enough, show you how to clean it and then when he's older either you tell him or have your DH show him. It really isn't a big deal to take the extra 2 seconds if that to clean the area. I kind of feel like people are trying to talk you into gettng your son cut so I just want you to keep in mind that just because one person says someone almost died because he wasn't cut or someone that someone knows gets all of these infections doesn't really mean anything. I'm sure there are plenty of guys that are cut that get lots of infections too or have other issues.

totally agree. with the proper care, uncirced boy can and will be just as clean as circed. my son is not circed and i have to do nothing special right now to clean him. the skin is still attached to his penis so i just wipe him and clean him like normal. in a couple years, once the skin naturally detatches then i will have to pull the skin back and clean under it, and of course will teach him how to care for it properly. it's really not a big deal. another thing i have to disagree with is the "locker room" theory. not being circed is becoming more and more popular...many babies now don't get it done. i'd bet by the time you baby is old enough to be in the locker room, he WON'T be the only uncired guy.
but to answer your question, i don't know anyone who did get circed as an adult. i'm sure it is painful, but i'm not sure that i agree with MORE painful that having it done as a baby. just because a baby can't remember it, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt like crap!

Bea · #19 August 3rd, 2009, 12:47 PM

okay.; totally lurking but have to butt in here lol

my dh was uncircumsi. till 4 years ago... he hated that his parents didn't do it for him..absoultely hated it.. and you know what I never said anything to him .. but eww.. if he didnt wash after he p'd each time it would get stiky in there.. and when he sweat he developed more of a smell to say.. he is the cleanest person I know, always washing it!!! he got to a point where he would pull it back and try and keep it that way all day to have the dry feeling.

for those who say sex is better one way or another and it is because of being with different partners.. well he was with me both circ'd and not circ'd, and sex is great with him circ'd his words.. he said he would do it over and over again.. but because he was older he said the procedure sucked!! He was in pain for quite a few days, and the stitches drove him nuts.. you dont need stitches as a baby.. so hence having our son done was never a question..(my ds never cried during the circ, and never cried when I changed his diaper or cleaned him after) yes you can teach them how to be clean.. but I dont know I guess it is a personal opinion.. dh is so happy he is circ'd now!!

regardless, this is a personal decision, that nobody else can make for you.. and whatever decision you make hon will be the right decision for you