SOOOO Frustrated!

seri0uslyc0nfused · #1 January 24th, 2012, 09:56 AM

I don't know what to do anymore. Adam WILL NOT poop in the potty. He screams and throws a huge fit every time he has to poop and wants a pull up. We have no problems with peeing, and he sleeps dry through the night. My husband and mother in law just let him put a pull up on whenever he asks and I just don't think that's OK. I think we should make him at least TRY to go in the potty before letting him go in a pull up. Am I being too harsh? He's 3 years old and we can't even put him into some sort of preschool a couple of days a week because of this.

What do you guys think, how should I handle this? I'm coming off as the mean one and its really starting to get to me that nobody will back me up. Does anyone have any ideas for me?

Alexa5 · #2 January 24th, 2012, 10:12 AM

I will preface to say I am certainly not the expert because Nicholas is not potty trained at all (other than doing it randomly once in a while because he feels like it at that moment). Two things come to mind:

1) if he is doing well otherwise and you are that far into it, it would make sense to go all out and just not allow pullups so that he knows to stay dry what he has to do.

2) the other piece that I have read a lot about, which is why I am not rushing anything, is that sometimes they are not fully ready yet, and that they comply much easier when they are. It is very common for a 3 year old to not be trained/ready until later 3's depending on the child. I think sometimes the stress of the age/preschool, etc, makes us as parents think they should be ready NOW, and it sometimes takes a bit more time, and they decide to just do when they are ready. In Nicholas' case he is not required to be trained to be in the 3's class, but I feel a little more pressure. But in reality he is not ready...he is getting there, but I can tell I would be wasting my time stressing all of us about it. He will do things well and quickly when he is ready.... and I saw a lot of responses to the effect of that on the internet from parents of 3 year olds.

Sorry it is difficult right now!

Zoostergirl · #3 January 24th, 2012, 11:16 AM

I'd totally let him poop in the pull-up and then dump it in the toilet while saying something like, "Yay! Poop goes in toilet!"

And if he does sit on the toilet a bit before or after pooping in the pull-up then praise/reward him for that.

I've potty trained three kids now and had this issue with two of them. We just kept it light and positive (as possible, I did lose my cool a couple times). It gets soooo frustrating I know, but as soon as it becomes stressful it's much harder on everyone.

It will happen. He will one day poop in the toilet of his own accord. Keep believing.

seri0uslyc0nfused · #4 January 24th, 2012, 02:10 PM

Thanks guys. I was just having a really hard day I guess. I would be so much happier if I could get him to at least TRY the potty then I will put a pull up on, but sometimes I can't even get that, I just get a screaming fit.

Today after he pooped in the pull up I showed him the poop and we put it in the potty. I feel like I'm training a cat or something. LOL. He was all grossed out by the poop and didn't want to see it. But I told him I have to see it when I clean him up and I don't like it either. So if he would poop in the potty nobody would have to look at it. I don't know if that sunk in at all, but it was worth a shot.

I guess I will need to chill out a bit and just hope something snaps soon and he will just start going.

Thank again for the input, It did make me feel better!

babyDamico · #5 January 24th, 2012, 02:54 PM

Payton did the same thing... we dumped it in the toilet and showed her that poop goes in the toilet. She still kept pooping in her panties. One day she was with her grandparents and went potty and she looked at her grandma and said "oh no! I have to poop" and my grandma told her that it was ok, and they would just sit there and sing...

and she pooped in the potty!!! She's been going in the potty ever since, but i'm not sure if she just didn't feel the pressure from her grandparents or if she was more relaxed there or what it was..