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My husband and I got the "OK" to have sex today... I did have a low-lying placenta, and even before we knew about that, husband and I were uncomfortable having sex anyways because of the cerclage. I was always either in pain, or he was just too scared. Doc says its okay since I have been measuring REALLY good, and as long as we wear a condom.
Well, needless to say, after not having sex for about 4 months, husband is still a "bit" uncomfortable with the idea, but is willing to give it a try if the doc says okay LOL
You all should've seen us in the condom isle today! ha! Its been so long since we've had to buy condoms! AND think about the pregnant girl walking up to the checkout with a pack of condoms and some lube! LMAO.. I wonder what the checkout lady thought.. husband wanted to have sex right away, as soon as we got home, but er...I opted to wait.. I think we won't have sex very often, so I am at least going to be nice and clean and feel a TINY bit sexy.. not come home for a quicky after not having sex for 4 months..
Plus.. I'm nervous.. I'm nervous that its going to hurt, that it'll cause me an infection, that SOMETHING will go wrong.. but I've heard/read about other women having sex just fine with a cerclage, as long as the doctor okays it.. DH said that he'll be gentle and careful.. I'm wondering how far he gets before he gets too scared and gives up.. He LOVES this baby, and will be too focused on whether he's hurting me, or the cerclage..etc...thhheeen again, he is a man, and he is a man who has had to go a LONG time without sex..The longest we've ever, ever gone!
I really want to try it, because I'm even MORE nervous thinking about the next time we have sex again will be around 6 weeks (or more) postpartum, and with me having a completely new vagina..
Its because semen has a chemical in that naturally softens the cervix, and makes it shorten much easier! THAT is why they say to have sex alot when you're full term and want to deliver.. I always thought it was from the contractions that sex gives people (well gives me) or from just the activity.. but nope, SEMEN.. LOL
LOL about going to the checkout obviously pregnant and with condoms!!!
I would try to make a relaxing evening out of it, that way even if it ends up being the last time, at least you'll have gotten a romantic evening out of it. Try to squeeze DH for a dinner out beforehand at your favorite restaurant! Good luck!
That is pretty funny about walking around the condom aisle. And I'm glad I'm not the only one who will admit to having concerns about how my va-j-j will be different in the future. (Sorry, TMI but you started it!) I am sure things will be ok with your husband, even if you don't do the deed for very long. Just try not to put too much pressure on the situation - enjoy the closeness and the attraction to each other, even if the actual act falls flat.
Yesterday my SIL invited me to hear some guest speaker talk about keeping your sex life interesting as you get older/further into a relationship. I pointed out to her that I am 1) pregnant; 2) currently single and 3) not allowed to have sex even if I was in a relationship since I have marginal placenta previa 4) hoping that when I am back to having a relationship I hope it will at least be interesting in the beginning - LOL. Some people just don't think. (Like the doctor who diagnosed my placenta previa and told me not to use tampons...uhm, really? did ya notice the pregnant belly that you just did the ultrasound on?!?)
sooo it didn't go as planned.. we tried, and I guess we technically DID have sex, but I just was too uncomfortable doing it, and so wasn't he.. I thought HE really wanted to do it and he thought I really wanted to do it...It was hard for me to even get into anything intimate until we both decided on not doing it because I was dreading it :/
We had a nice night anyways, after we both realized we would rather keep my cerclage infetion free, and this baby in me for as long as she's supposed to be.. The consensus on doctors say no sex during cerclage anyways, mine okayed it, and im not sure why, actually lol.
I really didn't think holding out would be this hard, but it stinks!! I wish I was a normal pregnant girl.. lol
Awwww...I can only imagine how frustrating that must be. You've only got a couple months left though and your whole lives together to fool around Sounds like you've got a great hubbie though to be concerned about you and the baby before his own needs.
Aww Im sorry it didn't go as planned How great of your husband to be so understanding though! Some men just don't get it. Ditto to what Marcia said...Youve got your whole lives together to fool around Thats what gets me thru these deployments...although I think Im starting to have withdraws. I think the hardest part is gonna be homecoming...6 months without then even LONGER to wait for me to get "all healed up"..if he even makes it home by then.
I'm sorry it didn't go well. That's really good that your DH is so understanding, as i know some guys aren't. I'm lucky too in that my DH is fine going without sex if need be. Maybe you two can find other intimate ways to be together other than sex?
I'm sorry it didn't go as planned, but I hear you on the pelvic rest - it sucks. I'm so glad your DH is understanding. I was actually surprised your doc ok'd it. When I had my cerclage, my doc said nothing in the vagina at all! TBH, I haven't really ever noticed a difference after giving birth.