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So weight hasn't gotten to me too much yet, because I've been thinking that i've been gaining it at an okay rate.. With DS I put weight on quickly, and I gained over 40lbs with him.. I started around 160 with DS and was a bit over 200 when I had him (I am 5'7") This pregnancy I started my pre-preggo weight a bit higher, 168, and so far have gained a bit over 20 lbs, last wiegh in a week ago I was 191.. I know that chances are I'll be over 200 again this time..
Now with DS it was REALLY hard for me to lose weight.. I had an awful diet, and I didn't exercise (and I was still in highschool).. I didn't lose the weight for a whole year when I went through a really really hard breakup.. I got down to 145 lbs!! I was so happy to be that thin! I have slowly acquired weight just from being with someone, married, and happy, etc.. It happens, but gradual isn't as noticable lol.
anyways, I got out my "fat pants" from storage today thinking that it would hold me over until 6-8 weeks after the baby is born when I can go shopping...I wore these pants when I stayed around 180 upper 170's for a long time after DS was born..
O.M.G.. I can't even get most of them on my butt!! I was mortified!! I knew my hips have gone crazy, but I didn't realize how much.. I figured I wouldn't be able to button them, but I cant even get some of them on!! We're talking really big sizes, pants that used to be MASSIVE on me pre-pregnancy.. I asked my husband if my ***** and hips have gotten that big, he's like "They havn't gotten REALLY big, bug they've grown a little." I am so so scared that I won't be able to lose the weight on my hips and butt.. I heard that 2nd pregnancies and on your hips will spread and stay that way.. is this true for anyone after having 2 kids? did your hips spread and stay that way?
I know it isn't right to be freaking out like this, I really can't help the weight gain, being on bedrest and everything, but I am so nervous that I won't have anything to wear in that awkward 6-8 weeks baby stage I'm so scared that I won't be able to lose this weight...i don't want to be heavy again, it was so hard on my self esteem last time.. my husband was actually laughing at me earlier, and I got so so mad.. he is very thin, and I just think it was so unfair of him to be laughing at me! I don't want a big butt, I don't want big hips, I don't want a gut, and worse of all, I am unproportioned!! Small arms, small chest, big stinkin hips, and small legs.. yeah, real stinkin attractive. I am holding onto the fact that these pants are 5 years old, and because I was 17/18 when I bought them I got them in the Jr's department, which everything is massively low rise.. I buy pants from the misses department now, becaus eI can't handle low-rise jeans.. my butt falls outt too much.. but still, some of these pants are a size 16/17!! I was a size 12-14 before.. Argh.
I don't know what to do.. I feel absolutely terrible about myself right now, and I still have 6 weeks left to go until I'm full term. which means more weight gain...I just needed to vent, because honeslty I want to crawl into myself and go to sleep until this is all over with...
I feel you. Im having a hard time with the weight gain and am looking forward to losing it. I went in for my appt. yesterday and found out I gained 5lbs in 2 weeks. EEEEK!! My body gains what it wants to gain and it is totally out of my control for now, so Im trying to stay positive. We only have a few weeks left, so yay!
((HUGS)) I know what you are dealing with. I am always so concerned about my weight when I am not pregnant.