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I want a new OB...is it too late to change?


Forum: 2010 Playroom

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  #1  
February 11th, 2010, 04:13 PM
emmabear's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2009
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So, in a nutshell, I have my current OB because he was my regular gyno and I just kept him on when I found out I was prego. I usually just see him for yearly exams so I didn't really care either way about his bedside manner.

The thing is, last week when I was in the hospital, he wasn't really that nice. A surgeon came in to meet with me who was amazing, very kind and sincere and actually listened to what my pains were. Then my OB came in and he was very dismissive. The day I got out of the hospital, the surgeon (who I didn't even meet until being in the hospital, I wasn't even his patient) had his office call for a follow up to make sure all was well with me. I never even heard from my OB's office.

In the few days following my release from the hospital, I still had pains, and I realized that I didnt' even have a way to contact my OB on the weekends. My DH thinks that's weird, that he should be accessible all the time, esp in the 3rd trimester.

So I had my regular appt today at my OB's office and first of all, the nurse really pissed me off. I get on the scale and she goes "you've gained 9 pounds in the last month. That's a LOT." I thought her attitude was pretty rude, and I said to her that I found that interesting because the scale at home differs about five pounds depending on time of day, what I've eaten, etc, and that I wasn't too concerned.

Then I met with my OB who told me to get off the sweets and carbs. I said to him that I am eating healthy and feel perfectly fine with my weight gain. You guys, I am still wearing pre-preg clothes, everyone keeps telling me how tiny I am, I am basically the same size as before with a basketball tummy, I am totally fine with how I look. He didn't listen to me at all, and told me again to stay off the carbs. WHATEVER.

Then I ask him about the kick counts because I was wondering how they work. He not only didn't explain this to me so that I understand it, he basically just shrugged it off. He said, as long as you don't go 2-4 hours without feeling the baby at all, it's not a problem. I said, I go without feeling him for 2-4 hours all the time. How do I know if it's a problem? He told me to lay on my left side and drink water and try to feel him. I explained to him that even when I do this, or drink juice, I still often don't feel him for half the day or even longer. He didn't offer my any other suggestions.

I asked him about the baby measuring a week ahead and he said it's normal. I asked what it meant, does it change my due date, is he big, etc? And he just changed the subject.

My next appt is in 4 weeks. I am 30 weeks now and thought my appts would start being every 2 weeks. He just shrugged it off.

I feel like I am not getting ANY of my questions answered. And I'm being called out on my weight when I am perfectly healthy and in the right range according to EVERYTHING i have read on my own.

I'm so frustrated.

I want to change to a different OB, the one that delivered my husband's kids. Is it too late in the game to change at 30 weeks?

I know my current OB is not going to listen to me during delivery and I'm really wanting someone a lot more reassuring and warm.

What do you guys think? Has anyone changed?
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  #2  
February 11th, 2010, 04:20 PM
fibigrey's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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its never too late!! My friend switched OBs like a month before she was due and delivered at a completely different hospital..

if you aren't happy, definitly change for sure!! It sounds like a pretty crappy office.. I would change if it werent for a bunch ofthings getting in the way and making it too complicated, because your OB sounds like mine (except mine is the only perniatologist in this area)..

But you'll regret it if you don't change and you have to deal with an OB like that in labor, because I had someone who didn't care about me at all in labor and I so regret it!

Oh AND, the weight gain issue is ridiculous!! If you're still in pre-preggo clothes sounds like you're small!! I wish I was LOL! My doctor is opposite and seems to not care about weight whatsoever.
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  #3  
February 11th, 2010, 04:24 PM
Max n Meghan's Mom's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Besides I don't think 9 lbs is bad at all! Don't they say 2 lbs a week is the average?

I don't think it's too late, call first thing tomorrow. It'd greatly bother me (besides all the other things) that you can't call him on a weekend. What if you went into labor over a weekend?
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  #4  
February 11th, 2010, 04:25 PM
Amanda C's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It's not too late to change if you can get someone else to see you. Here an OB want take you on after 20 weeks.

So there isn't anyone that takes call for your OB? That's weird.
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  #5  
February 11th, 2010, 04:31 PM
onelove1109's Avatar Super Mommy
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to Kristi. I would definitely not be happy if I got treated like that...and for a nurse to say "Thats alot" after weighing you?!!! Absolutely ridiculous!! I would not be okay with my dr burshing off my questions and not giving me answers. My dr is great about sitting down with you and taking time to fully answer any questions/concerns you might have...thats what kind of dr every pregnant woman needs and deserves.
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  #6  
February 11th, 2010, 04:46 PM
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I'm sorry your OB is being so awful, I would totally call around and try to find a new one! Maybe you can contact the surgeon you met with and ask for a referral if the other OB you're thinking of says no for some reason?

Wanted to add... if it seems like OB's are having issue with taking you on so late in the pregnancy I'd just claim insurance changed and your prior OB doesn't accept it, little white lie won't hurt anyone and I'm sure that actually happens sometimes!
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  #7  
February 11th, 2010, 04:52 PM
TeamNick's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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It is never too late to change and it sounds like a good idea in your case.
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  #8  
February 11th, 2010, 05:03 PM
emmabear's Avatar Super Mommy
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Good news.

My husband has two kids from his previous marriage and he loved the OB they used. He gave me his number just now, and I called and asked if he'd be willing to take me on this late in the game, the nurse said 'of course' and I have an appt TOMORROW.

Perfect!

I agree, I think having an OB who explains things and makes you comfortable and reassured is HUGE. Mine is just unfortunately not that way, I think this guy will be a lot better.
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  #9  
February 11th, 2010, 06:11 PM
sweatshirtgirl's Avatar Super Mommy
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Read your update - that's GREAT! I was going to say as long as you can find someone else and have some sort of clue that they are good, I'd switch in a heartbeat. I found out about 2 weeks ago that my OB is leaving the practice, which leaves NO OB's there so I have to find a new office AND OB. My old OB sounds a little like yours, brushing things off etc... so I didn't like her anyway and was thinking of switching but was too chicken. I'm so happy to be going to someone else now!
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  #10  
February 11th, 2010, 08:35 PM
palmetto_moon's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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So glad you changed! You DON'T want to deliver with an OB who doesn't listen to you and shrugs you off. God forbid there is an issue and you need an intervention and you can't get him to explain what you need to know in order to make an informed decision. Ugggg! So happy you found someone else!
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