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hey all. We are expecting twins boy/girl in 4 weeks, and i'm starting to feel the pressure!!! both physically and anxiety about how to care for 2 infants, a 9 month old, *she'll be 10 months when the twins are born*, and a 12 year old. not to mention taking care of myself and whatnot. i have my mom who is willing to help and of course my husband will help. But he can't take 6 weeks off work to be with me, while i recover from surgery and attempt to take care of pretty much 3 infants and a preteen!!!! so my question is, where do i turn to??? i keep hearing look in your community, but i dont know how to do that. we just moved here last october and i know no one. i dont know where to start. i have one resource right now that i just called and have an appointment for in a couple weeks.... but what do we do??? when we need all these diapers and have no money to buy them. its so hard. the twins were definitely not a planned thing....and we have had a really hard time adjusting to a new house. shortly after moving, my husband lost his job, and i was on 8 week rest from my last pregnancy c-section so i couldnt work. we had it really bad for a long time. I found out i was pregnant with these little ones just 2 and 1/2 months after having my little girl.... its SO overwhelming. and i'm scared i wont be able to handle all 4 right after my delivery. I'm having a hard time wanting his family around me. I know that i should take all the help that is offered, but i really have a hard time with his family. They aren't kind people and they dont listen to what anyone wants they do it their way and you can't say a word or you start drama. I just need my life to be as uncomplicated as possible. and calm as possible after having these babies, and i dont know what to do. i dont know how to tell my husband my feelings about his family. if i should say anything at all. which i dont think i should. but i KNOW i'm going to need the help. ugh!!!! either way my question is does anyone know how to go about finding a support group or some kind of group in my area to help me out with these babies!?!?! or with supplies that we dont money to buy or whatever???? i'm sooooooooo worrieD!!!!!thanks for listening to me!!! hope all is well with all of you and your bundles of joy!!!!
I'd start by looking at local churches. Is there a Salvation Army or St. Vincent De Paul or other similar group in your area? They might be able to help also. And depending on where you live, if your husband is laid off, you will probably qualify for state aid as well.
__________________ Amy: Wife to my Handsome Husband Mommy to my superhero, Max (3) and Luckiest Bonus Mama to Sammy (5)
When I had my twins I did it by myself..DH worked out of state and wasn't home very often . I did not have a small baby ..my son was 3 at the time.. I would have loved some help....Try the local churches, also care.com might work for you. If your family makes things stressful I personally would not use them. That is why I did it by myself. You don't need extra stress.
THANK YOU BAM FOR MY AWESOME SIGGY
Always Remembering Otis, Evan Navarro, Riley, and Patrick
~September 2010 DDC's Perfect Angels~
I hope you can find some extra help for when you need it. At my local health clinic they have a nurse come for a home visit every so often and since I'm a single mom with no help at all they can also offer me other services. So I'll be looking into that.
Maybe you can have a homemaker come in? I'm not sure if they still exist or if you'd be allowed to have or how they work.
One thing you can do now so you have less work later on is "feed the freezer" with about 2 weeks of heat and serve meals for your family so you don't have to cook as often right after babies arrive.
Try and get as organized as you can so things are easy to find when you need them.
Does your older daughter do her chores? Maybe she can take on a few other small things and make her own school lunches and little things like that.
Put the preteen to work! Not that she can do a TON...but she can do laundry, run a vacuum, get things for you...my son is 11 and he can do quite a bit of stuff. Does he like it? No. But I let him live here.
Where are you located?
I know in my community the local library has a board with different organizations that help out in the community. Have you looked online at websites for your town or community? Some are more helpful than others. Or if it comes down to it e-mail your town consel and she if there are any type of mother aid programs in your area.