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2 Questions..... *Help*


Forum: 2010 Playroom

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  #1  
September 15th, 2011, 08:13 AM
CanadianLou's Avatar Laura - mom of 3
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alberta, Canada
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So I have 2 questions... hoping you ladies could offer some advice etc.

#1. How do you discipline your 1 year old?

The reason I am asking this is because lately Alivia will do things she KNOWS is bad or she shouldn't do over and over and over. Example, she will try to hit the cat or baby with whatever she has in her hand. I stop her and say "Alivia, please don't hit the (cat/baby etc)" and then I move her away. She comes right back and does it again, laughing. So I hold her and say "No Alivia, it's not nice to hit" at this point I usually take what she has away and put her away from the baby/cat. She then proceeds to FLIP out SCREAMING and falling to the floor, banging her head on whatever she can find and then gets up and walks back to cat/baby and hits with her hand and laughs. This goes on and on and on for up to 1 hour. It's not always hitting, it could be anything she is doing she shouldn't be. I just don't know what to do. I know she is too young for time outs, and counting to 3. Also I should add, I have tried to distract her, and if it's a toy, she'll just take it and throw it ...if it's food she smoosh it into the carpet. Whatever I try to distract her with isn't working, it seems to make her more upset and then she goes right back to what she was doing.

#2 Are your kids climbing up on things? How do you keep them from doing it and make sure they don't hurt themselves?

I know Kristen was dealing with this a while ago, when Aly would climb up on chairs. So, Kristen, maybe you have some advice for me. But in the last week Livi has found she can now climb up on the coffee table and the sectional couch. She gets on them and then stands. She has fallen off the couch and table a time or two and it scares me so much. I usually say to her "Livi, sit down" or "Sit on your bum please" I know she understands because when I ask her to do this when she is on the floor she does it. So what she'll do is of course laugh at me and then squat down and stare at me and then slowly go up to her feet again. I keep saying over and over "Livi, please sit down" she will stand there until she sees me move to come get her, then she squats. I then usually place her on her bum and say something like "Please do not stand up, or I'll have to put you down". She of course does it again and I put it down on the floor. She has a melt down and then gets right back up and starts standing again. We will play this game for up to an hour...and I get sooooo frustrated.

I think ever since I read that story on here about the little girl falling from a standing position and died, I freak out if she is falling off of things and hitting her head etc.

In the end usually she has been screaming and crying for close to an hour and tires out and wants her blanket and sucky and lays on the floor to calm down and then is good, until the next time. We usually deal with this at least 8 times a day, and sometimes way more.

Any advice for these two things would be appreciated. I did not deal with this with my oldest DD, she was a very good listener, even at 1. Also she was scared if she fell once she would not do it again. Alivia is a dare devil.
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Last edited by CanadianLou; September 15th, 2011 at 08:24 AM.
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  #2  
September 15th, 2011, 09:42 AM
Shea131's Avatar Peyton Rylee's Mommy!!
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I'm sorry I don't really have any good advice for you. I'm pretty stern with discipline but Peyton does bang her head on things when she is mad (that would scare me too) and she sounds like your first DD and is a pretty good listener. I really hope some ladies have advice for you and Alivia starts listening better soon. Is part of it that she is jealous of Liam or was she like this before he was born? Maybe she is still adjusting to a new baby in the house and just obviously pushing your buttons. Keep redirecting her and being stern about sitting down on the couch or getting off, etc. If Peyton stands on the couch she is told to "sit on your butt" and she usually does. If she doesn't she is pulled off and sat on the floor and told "if you can't sit on your butt you are getting off the couch". She usually sits there and cries for 30ish seconds then she's over it and runs off and plays or gets back on the couch and sits. But like I said she doesn't do the head banging so I have no idea how to get Alivia to stop that.

Hang in there! I can only imagine how exhausted you must be! :hugs:
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  #3  
September 15th, 2011, 10:04 AM
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1) I typically remove Vi from the situation when she's being naughty. She understands time out and I'll put her in a little chair for a minute, and after that she's usually good.

2) Vi loves to climb, but for the most part she sits down when told to, so no help there.
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  #4  
September 15th, 2011, 10:29 AM
J-V221's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I ditto to what Shea said, could it be she's jealous?

Addisyn has her moments, but usually is really good about listening. Last night tho she continued to touch the stove knobs after being told no and removed. I put her in time out for a minute and she quit touching them for the night after that.

Climbing, Addisyn also loves to climb onto the couch and I let her. If I ask her to sit down she does or if I even mention to be careful and explain why-she slows down what she is doing to be careful.

Sorry I dont have advice either, but I hope things get better! HUGS
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  #5  
September 15th, 2011, 10:34 AM
frgsonmysox's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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For Charlie we just do a stern, "no" and remove him from the situation. If he throws himself into a temper tantrum we ignore him and he stops pretty quickly.

As for climbing, Charlie climbs everything!!! We try to make things as safe as possible for him but you can only do so much.
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  #6  
September 15th, 2011, 11:08 AM
mylene169's Avatar Kaija and Kolbie's Mommy
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Climbing I'm zero help with. Kolbie climbs into her booster seat and back down again on her own... and her favorite place to hang out is laying across the back of the couch looking out the window.

As for discipline we do the same as most everyone else. A stern "NO" and removing from the situation. Unfortunately she sounds like Alivia because she keeps going back and repeating the behavior we're trying to stop. But we keep repeating with the hopes that eventually it will stick.
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  #7  
September 15th, 2011, 12:30 PM
JaxonsMom2010's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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We used to just remove and say NO. But that isn't working as much. We have a time out corner that we are starting to use.

As for the climbing - this has become a nightmare for us. It is not the climbing up that worries me - it is the coming down.

Two nights ago, Jaxon was trying to get off my bed which is normally not a big deal. He just slides off feet first onto his belly. But not this time. He tried to get down at the foot and go stuck. I walked into the room and he was dangling at his belly on the foot board. Scared the crap out of me and him. So now I can't leave him there anymore.

These kids are something else some days....
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  #8  
September 15th, 2011, 12:54 PM
CanadianLou's Avatar Laura - mom of 3
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To answer the questions of Alivia being jealous. She did act out quite a bit before he came.

It's hard for me to judge if she is actually jealous, because she couldn't barely walk before Liam came, let alone climb up etc, so this is something new. But she did use to have major freak outs and bang her head before Liam came.

I know now with Liam here, she doesn't get 100% of my attention, and she can get away with more as I take more time to get up when I am nursing etc.

She is usually really good when I can give her 100% attention. Sing songs, play, tickle etc. But that is impossible now. Sometimes I think she is bored....but I don't know what to do to distract her.

I cannot imagine Livi staying in time out. I didn't even think anyone would be doing that this early. Maybe I should try....but like I said, I doubt she'll stay in time out. I'm freaking out I'll be like one of those mom's with out of control kids on Dr. Phil one day. She is sooo much different than my other kids. I swore when I would see other people's kids act out that it must be the parenting. But my gosh, it's like night and day with My first and second and so far Liam seems to be a lot like his oldest sister, very calm and easy going and quiet a pretty easy baby.

I have that mom guilt for having to spend so much time nursing him and holding him. But I also have Mom guilt for having to interrupt *his* mommy time right in the middle of his 'lunch'..to continually remove Alivia from the situation over and over. This is soo new for me. 2 under 2.
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  #9  
September 15th, 2011, 01:05 PM
QueenCrafty's Avatar Courtney
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mylene169 View Post
Climbing I'm zero help with. Kolbie climbs into her booster seat and back down again on her own... and her favorite place to hang out is laying across the back of the couch looking out the window.

As for discipline we do the same as most everyone else. A stern "NO" and removing from the situation. Unfortunately she sounds like Alivia because she keeps going back and repeating the behavior we're trying to stop. But we keep repeating with the hopes that eventually it will stick.
Abri is exactly the same way. She goes back over and over with a evil grin just waiting for us to tell her no. She also climbs everything. I do not allow standing on the furniture so I tell her "Bottome down or get down." I tell her three times and will put her on the floor if she doesn't listen. I am stern and stubborn, so I will continue to remove her from the situation over and over until she decides to do something else. If she throws a tantrum, I ignore it until she's done and try to redirect again.
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  #10  
September 15th, 2011, 01:29 PM
CanadianLou's Avatar Laura - mom of 3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QueenCrafty View Post
Abri is exactly the same way. She goes back over and over with a evil grin just waiting for us to tell her no. She also climbs everything. I do not allow standing on the furniture so I tell her "Bottome down or get down." I tell her three times and will put her on the floor if she doesn't listen. I am stern and stubborn, so I will continue to remove her from the situation over and over until she decides to do something else. If she throws a tantrum, I ignore it until she's done and try to redirect again.
I do this too, I was just hoping there was some other 'magic' I could do to get her stop

It's sooo tiring and frustrating, she is soooo stubborn. I'm glad my kid is not the only one to go back over and over again with an evil grin on her face. LOL
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