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Meltdowns


Forum: 2010 Playroom

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  #1  
December 6th, 2012, 08:24 AM
Celine's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I am posting my latest challenge of public meltdowns with Sophia. We are also having meltdowns at home a lot.

I was wondering if you ladies experiencing a lot more meltdowns as well? Is it everyday? All day long?

It seems like it is for us. She has such a hard time taking directions from me. Everything I tell her to do is horrible and she screams and throws herself down. And now the newest thing she calls "DADDDYYYYYY!" OMG. And he isn't even here. He is at work.

We were at Michaels this morning to just get some Christmas cards and she didn't want to hold my hand but run through the store. I took her by the hand and she was screaming "daddy" the entire time. Luckily, shopping didn't take very long. Then we went to the grocery store because I didn't have enough at Michaels!

At checkout she wanted to play with the credit card machine but couldn't reach it and it was screaming, crying and "daddy" again. She tried to kick me and headbutt me in the leg. I am thinking: who are you child? You used to be so sweet? So I told her "I love you" and she screamed even more.

I think I could keep a daily meltdown log. Maybe I should?

Anybody else going through this? Need some company in this misery.
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  #2  
December 6th, 2012, 10:42 AM
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Sorry it's taken so long to respond...I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I know the public meltdowns are the worst...

I think I can count that we've had 3 similar instances over here. And in looking back it has resulted in the fact that subconsciously, I've started being reeeaaallly selective about when I take her out, and in fact, though I didn't realize I was doing it, I think I take her out as little as possible. It's probably going to stay that way for a while, until I'm sure that there's little to no chance of it happening again.

The first was on the sidewalk in front of the house. I was trying to teach her how to ride her tricycle and keep her on the sidewalk. That turned into a meltdown like two houses away, and we turned around and went straight inside the house, but there were no repurcussions.

The second time was doing the same thing, only we made it half way down the street and I told her to turn back because she kept trying to ride it on to the street. She didn't like that and really took to a meltdown. Flailing, yelling, throwing herself on the ground and going limp. I made it back about half the distance before it escalated, and I wound up carrying her, the bike and her helmet into the house. I'll be honest, it wasn't my proudest moment, but as soon as we walked into the house I popped her on the butt, surprised the crap out of her, and put her on the stairs. She has not melted down on me like that again. It's been several months now.

The third time was totally our fault for taking her furniture shopping when she should have been napping. And when she set eyes on the balloons and the play area they have set up for kids, she went wrangy - we ended up leaving and she slept in the car after losing her balloon to the wind.

But those were the last ones I've had. Generally speaking she's always been pretty well behaved when we go out or when we're in company. But I think despite the fact that it wasn't my proudest moment, the stand I took with the bike that day hit home.

I don't have any specific advice for you, because you're going to have to find out what works on her. Best of luck sweetie.
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  #3  
December 6th, 2012, 06:26 PM
hilachu's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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oh meltdowns are a regular occurrence at this point for us
in public at home, where ever
i try to distract him with something else which helps on occasion
ignoring him is another option for us
or if he starts throwing/hitting its time out for the monster
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  #4  
December 7th, 2012, 05:48 AM
Celine's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shockandawe View Post
Sorry it's taken so long to respond...I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I know the public meltdowns are the worst...

I think I can count that we've had 3 similar instances over here. And in looking back it has resulted in the fact that subconsciously, I've started being reeeaaallly selective about when I take her out, and in fact, though I didn't realize I was doing it, I think I take her out as little as possible. It's probably going to stay that way for a while, until I'm sure that there's little to no chance of it happening again.

The first was on the sidewalk in front of the house. I was trying to teach her how to ride her tricycle and keep her on the sidewalk. That turned into a meltdown like two houses away, and we turned around and went straight inside the house, but there were no repurcussions.

The second time was doing the same thing, only we made it half way down the street and I told her to turn back because she kept trying to ride it on to the street. She didn't like that and really took to a meltdown. Flailing, yelling, throwing herself on the ground and going limp. I made it back about half the distance before it escalated, and I wound up carrying her, the bike and her helmet into the house. I'll be honest, it wasn't my proudest moment, but as soon as we walked into the house I popped her on the butt, surprised the crap out of her, and put her on the stairs. She has not melted down on me like that again. It's been several months now.

The third time was totally our fault for taking her furniture shopping when she should have been napping. And when she set eyes on the balloons and the play area they have set up for kids, she went wrangy - we ended up leaving and she slept in the car after losing her balloon to the wind.

But those were the last ones I've had. Generally speaking she's always been pretty well behaved when we go out or when we're in company. But I think despite the fact that it wasn't my proudest moment, the stand I took with the bike that day hit home.

I don't have any specific advice for you, because you're going to have to find out what works on her. Best of luck sweetie.
Thanks. I am jealous that you only had 3 meltdowns in 2 years? That's incredible. You are very lucky! I do take her outside and tell her to stop her behavior when we are in public. If it doesn't stop then I put her in the car seat and tell her we are going home if she doesn't stop. And if it doesn't stop we will go home. I have only had to go home one time so far. She knows I mean business when I take her outside but that doesn't mean she won't melt down.

Quote:
Originally Posted by hilachu View Post
oh meltdowns are a regular occurrence at this point for us
in public at home, where ever
i try to distract him with something else which helps on occasion
ignoring him is another option for us
or if he starts throwing/hitting its time out for the monster
Thanks for your response. Not that I want anybody to have to deal with meltdowns on a regular basis but it helps me a lot knowing I am not alone out there with these temper tantrums. We had a few more meltdowns at home. I am still working on the eating issues that we have as well. Sophia likes to snack a lot and not eat real food. She doesn't eat what we eat and I always said to myself "I am not going to be one of those moms that makes a special meal for their child". Ha! Now I am eating my own words. So I am really trying and working on giving her healthy snacks and real meals. I think that's part of the temper tantrums it b/c she is hungry. She is waiting for goldfish and so on.
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  #5  
December 7th, 2012, 05:57 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Celine View Post
Thanks. I am jealous that you only had 3 meltdowns in 2 years? That's incredible. You are very lucky! I do take her outside and tell her to stop her behavior when we are in public. If it doesn't stop then I put her in the car seat and tell her we are going home if she doesn't stop. And if it doesn't stop we will go home. I have only had to go home one time so far. She knows I mean business when I take her outside but that doesn't mean she won't melt down.



Thanks for your response. Not that I want anybody to have to deal with meltdowns on a regular basis but it helps me a lot knowing I am not alone out there with these temper tantrums. We had a few more meltdowns at home. I am still working on the eating issues that we have as well. Sophia likes to snack a lot and not eat real food. She doesn't eat what we eat and I always said to myself "I am not going to be one of those moms that makes a special meal for their child". Ha! Now I am eating my own words. So I am really trying and working on giving her healthy snacks and real meals. I think that's part of the temper tantrums it b/c she is hungry. She is waiting for goldfish and so on.
Then hold tight and buckle down. She'll probably press it as long as she can physically stand it, and you're right, it's probably a reaction directly to a change. But it sounds like you're making the right change, so just hold tight. You're doing it right. She'll convert eventually - because there is no other alternative.

Sending you big hugs.
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  #6  
December 8th, 2012, 11:03 AM
Celine's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Thank you. I hope it will pay off. The meltdowns have gone down - only a couple a day. I keep telling myself I need to start a journal so I can write down meltdowns and eating behaviors. And maybe figure out a pattern.
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  #7  
December 8th, 2012, 06:24 PM
Trish36's Avatar Mom of 4
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Location: Ontario, Canada
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So far it hasn't been that bad. She does have her moments, and she tries to spit at me or lick me (her sister hates that and she thinks it's going to work on me too). But usually I stand my ground and just look at her with a very stern face and say no, and after a few minutes she'll start crying and comes and says sorry. She is pretty bad at holding my hand and I've had to chase her down a few times. But then again we don't go out very much. Today we went to pick a Christmas tree and I almost pulled my hair out. But usually she is pretty good. Her 5 year old sister on the other hand.....that's another story. sigh.
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