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  #1  
January 26th, 2011, 07:31 AM
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*vent ahead!*
I broke the news to my boss yesterday, who took it AMAZINGLY well, better than I could have ever expected, she was very supportive and concerned. I brought in my u/s pictures and showed her and a few other people in the office. Well, a girl who (used to be) a friend of mine made a comment that really hurt..and this is the second time this pregnancy shes made some sort of hurtful comment. I was showing them to another girl at work, and she looks at me and says "dont even show me, I dont want to know anything about it. Im not getting attached to the idea till I see a baby" Anyone who knows my history, can understand WHERE shes coming from, but really..? People really need to think before they speak cause that one really hurt. What kind of friend does that? I don't even know how to handle her, shes like a complete "downer". I can't stand the negativity. Is there anybody else dealing with a pessimistic person like this? How do you handle it?!
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  #2  
January 26th, 2011, 07:33 AM
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What a JERK. Seriously, you don't need people like that in your life. I'm really glad your boss was so supportive though. Concentrate on that!
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  #3  
January 26th, 2011, 07:37 AM
Mama.Angie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm glad everything went so well with your boss! That girl is one of the worst kind. I'd ignore her completely. If she can't be excited/happy for you now, then I wouldn't even glance her way when the baby comes. What a rude and awful thing to say to a pregnant woman.
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  #4  
January 26th, 2011, 07:37 AM
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You tell her to shut up and walk away
rude people piss me off

glad your boss took it well!
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  #5  
January 26th, 2011, 07:41 AM
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I know. I think the reason it bothers me so much is because she was one of my best friends, and biggest support systems in the past. I understand in a way where shes coming from, but that still HURT a lot.
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  #6  
January 26th, 2011, 07:51 AM
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I'm so glad to hear your boss took it well! And I'm equally sad to hear about this woman at your work. That's not something I would even think was ok to say to someone I didn't like, much less someone I used to be good friends with! I'm sorry you have to deal with her. Looks like we have another one in need of the ol' head kick!
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  #7  
January 26th, 2011, 08:01 AM
mafiamom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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very glad to hear that your boss was supportive. that will make life a lot easier.

sorry to hear that your friend was so brutal.... that was totally inappropriate. really, i cant even think of an excuse for her to say something like that. sorry she hurt you.
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  #8  
January 26th, 2011, 08:09 AM
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Since you say she is a friend, I would explain to her how bad her comment hurt. I would tell her that I am really being optimistic about this, and her well wishes and support could have been used. Hopefully she will understand if you explain to her, and if she doesn't, make it a point to avoid talking to her about pregnancy related issues.
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  #9  
January 26th, 2011, 08:13 AM
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wow! I'm sorry she was so insensitive. I would definitely say something to her, though. But yay for your boss being so supportive!
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  #10  
January 26th, 2011, 08:21 AM
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geez she's a nice one sorry you had to deal with that
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  #11  
January 26th, 2011, 09:24 AM
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Wow that's horrendous!
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  #12  
January 26th, 2011, 09:28 AM
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I haven't had it happen with this pregnancy but my mom after my divorce told me she didn't want me to ever vent to her about my ex cause she was still dealing with the pain he caused her. Okay outside of her being my mom he didn't do anything directly to her. he cheated and hit me. But some people take everything as it's happening to her. She shouldn't have said it but maybe she really felt so bad last time that she didn't want to have to feel that bad again. But she needs to keep it to her self.
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  #13  
January 26th, 2011, 10:38 AM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
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Yeah, she'd definitely be an ex friend.
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  #14  
January 26th, 2011, 10:46 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachel View Post
Yeah, she'd definitely be an ex friend.


I would have had a hard time not punching her in the face. I am sorry people can be such jerks. She's not someone I would want to share the joys of my pregnancy with anyway! Glad your boss handled it well! That's a load off your shoulders dear.
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  #15  
January 26th, 2011, 01:52 PM
mico's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Ugh, I'm so sorry that you have to deal with that! I work with a girl who I have LITERALLY been fighting with since the THIRD GRADE! YES, THIRD GRADE!!!!!!!! She has always been the "mean girl" type of person. We both work in the same school that we went to, and she seems to think that she still attends that school as a child, not an adult! It makes it super difficult considering her, and her "cronies" are all around me! Try to just hang in there and ignore her. Don't let her see that it bothers you, just make sure to be EXTRA happy around her!
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  #16  
January 26th, 2011, 02:22 PM
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Wow - brutal. I understand that if she hasn't had a loss, she can't really understand what you've gone through, but in that case I would think that *most* people would err on the side of caution and just shut-up! Urghhh - there's one in every crowd though, isn't there??
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  #17  
January 26th, 2011, 03:13 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
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I'm truly sorry she said that to you. How very frustrating.

When I was pregnant with Erin, a friend I worked with was pregnant too. It was her first pregnancy, and it was going as normally and as healthy as you could expect. But she always came to me with her worries about every little twinge and every little cramp, SO SURE she was going to lose the baby. It was very very hard for me, having actually lost a baby and terrified and it made me so angry that she just wouldn't shut up. So one day, she said she was glad she could come to me because "I knew how she felt" and I totally lost it. I said something along the lines of the fact that I was million more times as frightened as her, that she had no reason to worry at all, and I did, and I just needed positivity when pregnancy came up and if she couldn't do that then she needed to stop talking to me.

Not as insensitive as your comment, but I understand how thoughtlessly hurtful people can be. I'm sorry that she was. I agree with Rae, I'd let her know just how much her comment hurt you, and if she can't see your point and apologize and do better, then you don't need her in your life right now.

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