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If your teenage daughter was pregnant...


Forum: 2011 Playroom

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  #1  
June 1st, 2011, 07:09 AM
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do you think that you would let the boyfriend/father live with you?
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  #2  
June 1st, 2011, 08:10 AM
..Jessica..'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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No. My friend went through this same thing when she was pregnant with her son when we were 17, her mom did let the guy live there and he tried to take over the house and have them make his dinner, do his laundry, etc. All because he was having a baby with my friend. He was kicked out about a month into it, and never talked to my friend after that. Their son is now 7 years old and hasn't seen his father once.

I think if they even ask its wrong, if they aren't working thats now another mouth to feed plus the expenses for the baby's arrival.
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  #3  
June 1st, 2011, 08:14 AM
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I think it would depend on if the guy had a job. Like Jessica said, that would be another mouth to feed and another person to clean up after. If he had a job and would help out around the house as well, then I might consider it.
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  #4  
June 1st, 2011, 08:23 AM
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It's hard to say (hard to even imagine!) but probably not. I don't think it sends the right message, but I'm not one to judge because I'm truly not sure how I'd feel/react in a situation like that.
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  #5  
June 1st, 2011, 08:32 AM
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After our oldest was born (and then my parents kicked me out) we lived with my now husband's parents for awhile. Unless you are in a good place and have a good relationship, I don't recommend it. I had horrible ppd (but didn't know it) and really messed up our relationship for a long time.
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  #6  
June 1st, 2011, 08:47 AM
10x_A_Mommy's Avatar formerly mom_of_8
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I wouldn't. I have a teenage daughter, and if she became pregnant I would want the guy as involved as possible, but there's no way he'd be living under my roof.
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  #7  
June 1st, 2011, 08:59 AM
Cheshire's Avatar Mommy to three beauties!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AZsnowflake View Post
It's hard to say (hard to even imagine!)
lol same here! I was watching some of 16 & Pregnant and it made me wonder what I'd do but it really is hard to imagine.
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  #8  
June 1st, 2011, 09:08 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mama2seven View Post
I wouldn't. I have a teenage daughter, and if she became pregnant I would want the guy as involved as possible, but there's no way he'd be living under my roof.
ditto
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  #9  
June 1st, 2011, 09:47 AM
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NO I wouldn't let him. I too would want him involved in the whole process and to help support the baby but unless they planned on getting married and were in a committed relationship for a long while that isn't appropriate! I would say unless you would have done it without a baby you shouldn't do it with!

Maybe after the baby was born I would let him stay some nights to help her out but not until then!
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  #10  
June 1st, 2011, 11:01 AM
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Yes but not til after the baby was born so he could help out with the baby and as long as he also had a job.
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  #11  
June 1st, 2011, 11:29 AM
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I think about this all the time...I know I have a long time to worry but being a teen mom myself it scares me to death. It would really depend on the guy. If both were still in highschool then yes I would but they will have to maintain good grades and apply to college (even if it is a tech school). I would want to give them a start that no one would give Adam and myself, we made it, barely but it was a struggle. At 24 I have NO college education what-so-ever, thankfully Adam got a good degree and an awesome oppurtunity but getting to that point took 5 years of hell.

On the otherhand if the boy was a loser that did not care about the future of his family then screw him he can live on the streets.

Other conditions would be chores, I don't need someone else to clean up after,Birth Control!!!!! lol, and respect.
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  #12  
June 1st, 2011, 12:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mama2seven View Post
I wouldn't. I have a teenage daughter, and if she became pregnant I would want the guy as involved as possible, but there's no way he'd be living under my roof.
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  #13  
June 1st, 2011, 12:06 PM
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Probably not. He can be involved and support the baby, but not live under my roof.
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  #14  
June 1st, 2011, 01:55 PM
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After my daughter recovered from my attempted murder (totally joking, or not.... ) I would have to really think about it! My initial response is no, but if they were determined to live together I would probably rather it be with us, then struggling on their own or living somewhere dangerous or unsuitable. It would be on various conditions including either working or studying or seriously contributing to the household. This is my rational response, but who knows what would come out at the time!!!
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  #15  
June 1st, 2011, 08:40 PM
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I would not allow him to move in but I would set up a schedule where he is staying over (in a separate room) certain nights to help with the night duties.
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  #16  
June 2nd, 2011, 10:48 AM
Happy Song's Avatar Nicole
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My oldest son has a baby who will be 2 in July. The baby's mama is 18. They let him live there. They are trying to make it on there own.

Me with my daughter, I say no.
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  #17  
June 2nd, 2011, 11:19 AM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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If one of my sons got a girl pregnant and they were not able to financially take care of the baby I would want them to stay here. (with rules of course)

When I was 21 I had my first son. My husband (we were married, mind you) would go off and spend his whole check on going out sometimes. One time I did not eat for days and I begged my mom for help. Her response was you had a child deal with it.

I would never put my children or grandchild in a situation where they did not feel they could come to me for something.
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  #18  
June 2nd, 2011, 07:10 PM
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It would completely depend on the situation and the guy because I would think my daughter should get help at night so she could continue going to school without being completely exhausted.
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