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Forum: 2011 Playroom

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  #1  
June 2nd, 2011, 11:15 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Western USA
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Or, rather my neighbor. My neighbor across the way and I have been talking more and the other day I found out that she has been TTC (or as she likes to put it, not trying not preventing but I think they are really actually trying) for about 2 years now. We were talking and she was asking me questions about getting pregnant. I find out that she has no doctor that she's going to. I told her she should get a doctor so they could try and help her and give her more advice. She goes on to tell me that she's had 2 miscarriages and still never has seen a doc. I kindly ask why and she says, because I knew what it was and figured there was no reason to. She says she figures that something is just wrong with her and that she'll never be able to have kids. I know I shouldn't worry about her, but I know she'd really like to have kids and probably could if she'd only get help. I referred her to JM and she seemed excited and said she wanted to go inside and look it up immediately. I haven't talked to her since so don't know if she did or not. My question is should I suggest something else or help her find a doctor or just let her be? I really enjoy visiting with her but now I feel bad when I talk about baby and know that she really wants one.
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  #2  
June 2nd, 2011, 11:18 AM
BeachMum's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Posts: 4,219
Having suffered through infertility with 3 of my 4 kiddos, I would just suggest seeing a doctor because sometimes it's an easy fix, like progesterone or something. Or maybe as simply as timing being off. I wouldn't push, it took me awhile before we finally got "help"
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  #3  
June 2nd, 2011, 12:00 PM
mom2moose
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I would suggest a doctor, but some women just aren't comfortable doing that. Make the suggestion, but then back off and let her do what she wants. I was told I was infertile, and my fist husband and I tried for over 6 years. Then he passed and my now hubby and I got pregnant after 2.5 years. Huge surprise. But in the beginning, with my first husband, I got sick of people always giving me advice. It made it seem like it was my fault or something. So I would make the suggestion to see an OB, and let her do with it what she wants!
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  #4  
June 2nd, 2011, 12:19 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Western USA
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Thanks, I think that is what I'll do. The thing is she's been asking me questions and I have no answers for her. My DH were very lucky and had no problem. I got pregnant the month I went off Birth Control so I have no experience or advice for her. Hopefully if she did give JM a try the TTC and fertility boards will have answers for her!
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  #5  
June 2nd, 2011, 12:30 PM
mom2moose
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Yeah, boards like these ones, the TTC and Infertility boards are a HUGE help!! It was a really good idea to suggest them to her.
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  #6  
June 2nd, 2011, 02:30 PM
BeachMum's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I agree the boards are a HUGE help. I wasn't a part JM when ttc, but another one and was on there for 2 years before getting pregnant with my first. It was a wealth of knowledge.
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  #7  
June 2nd, 2011, 03:11 PM
MsSilverSpec's Avatar Mama of 2 <3
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Location: California
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I think one of the best things you did was to refer her to JM. There are a lot of helpful women on here who have been through what she has.
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  #8  
June 3rd, 2011, 10:42 AM
bayhay's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Missouri
Posts: 267
I struggled with TTC for a year and as soon as I thought something was wrong, I made an appointment with a fertility doctor. I did a lot of online research (didn't know about JM then) but learned a lot online. I think if she really wants children, she'll make an appointment with an OB or a fertility doctor to get checked out. It's the only way she'll know for sure what's going on with her.
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