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All is well with me. Incision healed up nicely and such. I decided to go on the mini-pill so I've got to go pick that up from the pharmacy today. I'm not thrilled about going on hormonal BC but it's the best option at this point.
My midwife had a student MW with her that happened to work in lactation previously so we spent an extensive amount of time talking about my BFing difficulties. She evaluated Miles' oral anatomy and not only does he have a tongue tie but he also has a bad gag reflex to boot (which I already knew). So even if he wanted to take more of my breast into my mouth he probably physically can't. She was really supportive of my efforts to BF but did gently convey to me that nursing babies with these types of difficulties will always be harder than a "normal" baby so it's basically up to me as to what level of commitment I'm willing to make in order to keep going. The tongue-tie can be clipped, but the gag reflex isn't really fixable so he may always be a nipple feeder, at least until he gets a lot bigger. So I have to decide if I can withstand the continuous pain, undersupply and more frequent feedings in order to BF. What a great choice . I'm still going to see the LC this Sunday and then after her and I talk I'll make an educated decision as to what I should do.
Also, it was funny because they asked if they could see my breasts just to make sure I didn't have physical issues that made it tough for the baby to nurse. I unlatched my nursing bra and whipped my boobs out, and they both simultaneously said, "Wow, you have perfect nipples!" I know they meant it in terms of them being good for nursing but it was still really funny .
I had been meaning to ask you if you have tried a nipple shield. I used one and it really helped me. My nipples wouldn't really stay hard without it. The nurse at the hospital said they weren't "big enough" and there's nothing "wrong" with using a shield. I think it also helped Brynlee transition to a bottle because it's so similar. She didn't have a problem going between nipple, shield, or bottle, but I just assumed it was because of the shield. I used it more often than not.
I hope the LC can help you out or offer some advice. I know you're trying very hard and you're doing great things for your big boy, but just know that it IS okay if you decide to stop. I had a hard time finally "giving up" because I felt like a failure, but I know that I tried hard and breastfed/pumped for 2 months plus she still has a large supply in the freezer so she will get it for a bit longer.
GL at your LC appt and definitely let us know how it goes!!
My midwife and her student asked if I had tried a nipple shield and were honestly surprised that I didn't receive them in the hospital. Apparently it's a running joke among the midwives that nipple shields seem like a mandatory item in the postpartum ward because even the women who don't need them end with with them. I told them that I honestly didn't find either of the hospital LCs very helpful and they didn't offer me squat except the reassurance that he would "grow" into nursing. I have thought about getting a shield but now at this point I am not sure if I want to open that can of worms. Apparently it's hard to get some babies off the shield once they're used to it and I don't know if I want to deal with that. I'm going to talk to the LC about it and see what she recommends.
And believe me, I know that it's okay to stop. I have two kids that were pretty much FF from the day they were born and they are beautiful, smart, wonderful kids. I know Miles won't die if he isn't breastfed. I just believe in the benefits of it (both nutritional and psychological) and I was really hoping to provide those to him for as long as possible. That, and at the end of the day I find it to be much more inexpensive and convenient than formula (I know that's debatable for some, but in my life that seems to be the case at least). If that means only two months, that's okay. If it means a year, that's even better. I didn't really go into BFing with a definitive goal. But I do know that I'm hesitant to give up until I know that I've tried to overcome anything that is easy to fix. If it ends up being something that's not fixable, then I'll be the first to say that it's time to stop, believe me. And even if I stop nursing round the clock, I will likely still nurse before bedtime and through the night (sorry but making bottles in the middle of the night sucks) and then pump exclusively during the day with the hospital grade pump. I dunno, we'll see!
Thank you, *sharon*, for my siggy!
Last edited by DaniB+4; October 6th, 2011 at 09:22 AM.
Sorry to hear you are having so many complications, it really does sound like you have done a wonderful job and sticking to it so far. I hope your meeting with the LC goes well and you can come up with the right decision for you and Miles