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  #1  
June 13th, 2012, 08:41 AM
joonzgurl's Avatar Proud mama of 2 girls
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University/college? Liviing expenses? What about a car as a teenager? Cell phone bill? Clothes?

Have you thought about it?
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  #2  
June 13th, 2012, 08:57 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joonzgurl
University/college? Liviing expenses? What about a car as a teenager? Cell phone bill? Clothes?

Have you thought about it?
I figure we will be a lot like my parents when it comes to this. They helped pay for college but I had to work to help pay for it too.
They bought my first car but i paid gas and upkeep. I had to pay for my own cell phone. My parents spent a certain amount on my clothes and if I wanted more I had to spend my own money.

Eta: my first car was a $1000 station wagon. My kids can expect something similar unless they want to pay more for one with their own money.
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Last edited by Aenyx; June 13th, 2012 at 09:23 AM.
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  #3  
June 13th, 2012, 09:09 AM
babi_lovin11's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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University/college? They will each have a college fund that we are saving threwout the years until they are 18. But after that its up to them to get a job and get loans. Should be enough money saved up for the first year at least.

Liviing expenses? May help with rent, depends.

What about a car as a teenager? No. I was almost 21 before I got my van I paid for it myself and I also had to pay for my driving lessons myself, it was 600 bucks and I was a single mom living on my own, it sure was tough but I did it. I want to teach my kids the same thing I learned, you should not depend on anyone else for money. If you want something you need to work for it.

Cell phone bill? Absoutly not.

Clothes? No way, clothes as gift for birthdays and christmas.

I may sound mean but I will help my kids out if they turley need it but I will not let them use us for everything, they need to learn how to do it themselves
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  #4  
June 13th, 2012, 09:14 AM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
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Because I have grown kids, I can tell you.

I paid for everything till they were out of school then they were on their own. Neither wanted to go to college, but Sarah did for a while and got financial aid. She quit so it's good that I didn't pay. My parents gave James a car and insured it for him and Sarah's dad gave her a car and I insured it for her. Now that they are both nearly over 21, they don't depend on me for help, though I do from time to time.
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  #5  
June 13th, 2012, 09:16 AM
joonzgurl's Avatar Proud mama of 2 girls
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Location: Small Town, Alberta, Canada
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I plan to help my kids out more than I got from my parents, but by no means do I want to give them a free ride.

University/college- I will pay tuition and basic living expenses. They will be expected to work in the summer and budget through the year for spending money and other bills.

Cell phone- Pay themselves.

Car- I will match what they put into it for their first car. They will be responsible for gas and insurance.

Clothes- As kids, yes I will pay for everything. As teenages, they will get a clothing budget.I will buy a new winter coat when they truely need it. Same with shoes. If they want to buy more than the money I gave them, they will have to find their own money. Also, if they want to blow all their money on an expensive piece or two, that is up to them.
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  #6  
June 13th, 2012, 09:19 AM
irishblessing's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Have I thought about it? No, not really!

I have a Education Savings Plan for Kaitlyn (haven't started Dominic's yet) so we do plan to help out with some costs of University/college.

Living expenses. I would like to give them the option to stay at home while going to school if possible, if not, I'm not sure.

A car, yeah, I'm sure DH will get them cars. He used to be a mechanic and is very into cars so hears of good deals all the time etc. I'm sure he will do some of the mechanic work on them as well - if he doesn't teach them how to do it themselves! I don't plan to pay for gas at all.

Cell phone and clothes will be mostly up to them. A lot of it depends, if they have a job and aren't blowing money, are going to school and do really well then obviously I'll reward them for that with different things. If they are being immature and buying crap all the time with no money left for important things then no way. I'm not afraid to let them learn a lesson.
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  #7  
June 13th, 2012, 09:50 AM
~Rae~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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University/college? Bachelor's degree only, but I'm hoping they get scholarships. They're on their own for grad school.

Liviing expenses? We will pay room and board for college. Tim thinks that every person should experience dorm life for at least one year, so we will push for that. If they want to come home after that year and stay while they finish their degree, that's fine.

What about a car as a teenager? Yes. What will probably happen is they will take Tim's or my car, and then we will get a new one.

Cell phone bill? Yes.

Clothes? Yes.


This of course is all contingent upon behavior. If they do nothing, they get nothing. Act up, and we won't go the extra mile. Yes, I think a teenager having a car and a cell phone is going the extra mile.
Also, DH and I differ on the opinion of teenagers getting jobs. He had one starting at 15, so he thinks all kids should have one because it teachers responsibility. I, on the other hand, think that school IS the kid's job. I want my kids to really focus on school, earning the highest gpa possible, and their extra-curricular activities. I think that teaches responsibility, preps them for college, and gives them a better shot at getting a full ride in college. I would LOVE to not have to pay for college. I remember going to high school with kids who worked. Some were able to balance school and work great, but many of them blew school off and even used certain classes to catch up on sleep.
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  #8  
June 13th, 2012, 09:58 AM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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We plan on being similar to my parents on this one. College we will do as much as we can. As well as offer part of my husband's GI bill since he is going to school while in the navy he will not use it once he is out. And it can now be used by family.

Car when the graduate HS and not before but they must also earn it.

Insurance/cell/gas I want them to pay for. Or at least 1/2 of insurance. I couldnt get my license until I could pay for insurance.

Living expenses as long as they are living at home we will provide as much as we can. If they go to college close to home I prefer they live at home. My friend was forced to live in the dorm her first year and had an awful experience (the college was only 20-25 minutes away from home). And I dont feel I should force my children to live away from home if they do not want to and if they are not ready.

Clothes- We will pay for their clothes to an extent. If they want a 65 dollar pair of jeans then well they will just have to pay for those or at least 1/2. All with in reason.
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  #9  
June 13th, 2012, 10:08 AM
~Rae~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
My friend was forced to live in the dorm her first year and had an awful experience (the college was only 20-25 minutes away from home).
What a shame! I lived for one year in dorms, and I had a blast! I think it's really hard to be fully integrated into the college experience when you commute. Once I started commuting, things really changed for me. I was basically just taking classes. Tim lived in dorms the first year, then a university apartment for the remainder, and I STILL can't get him to shut up about his college years.
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  #10  
June 13th, 2012, 10:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Rae~

Also, DH and I differ on the opinion of teenagers getting jobs. He had one starting at 15, so he thinks all kids should have one because it teachers responsibility. I, on the other hand, think that school IS the kid's job. I want my kids to really focus on school, earning the highest gpa possible, and their extra-curricular activities. I think that teaches responsibility, preps them for college, and gives them a better shot at getting a full ride in college. I would LOVE to not have to pay for college. I remember going to high school with kids who worked. Some were able to balance school and work great, but many of them blew school off and even used certain classes to catch up on sleep.
Me and and my 2 younger sisters had to get jobs at 16, if we wanted money to have things like a car to drive, or a cell phone. All 3 of us graduated high school with honors. we were all told that if our grades suffered AT ALL, we'd have to quit working.
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  #11  
June 13th, 2012, 10:33 AM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
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Oh and yes, we pay the cell phone bill till they are able to support themselves. It's only $20 a month to keep them on my family plan anyway.
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  #12  
June 13th, 2012, 11:16 AM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Rae~ View Post
What a shame! I lived for one year in dorms, and I had a blast! I think it's really hard to be fully integrated into the college experience when you commute. Once I started commuting, things really changed for me. I was basically just taking classes. Tim lived in dorms the first year, then a university apartment for the remainder, and I STILL can't get him to shut up about his college years.
I think its because it was forced. Her and her mom fought a lot about it She is an RN now so I dont think she lost anything out of the college experience and I didnt either living at home.
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  #13  
June 13th, 2012, 11:24 AM
~Rae~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I don't mean doing worse at school. I mean missing out on the clubs, parties, getting to know people, hanging out at the UC etc. It may not be that way for all, but I definitely noticed the difference once I started commuting. I basically came in one door & went out the same way.
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  #14  
June 13th, 2012, 11:43 AM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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I know what you meant, but I guess it is our personalities, we are not party people and most people that went to this college we went to HS with or we met new people actually in class.
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  #15  
June 13th, 2012, 04:01 PM
mccaroline's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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We plan to help them with post high school education, although they will have to pay some too. We're going to encourage them to go to a school in the area and live at home however if now we'll also help with dorm costs.

Cell phone is their expense if they want one.

Clothes we will buy what they need as long as they live at home, but if they want top brand names then they will have to pay the extra. As in if I can buy them a winter coat for $75 but the one they want is $150 they need to come up with the extra $75.

Car is there expense if they want one, along with insurance and fuel costs. We'll help them cover the cost of their license though.

I got my first full time summer job babysitting 10 hour days 5 days a week when I was 12, by the time I was 14 I was working full time summers, Christmas break and March break in a factory, at 16 I added an evening job at a local library. My factory job then turned into an office job at the same company, and my libary job continued through college. I was able to pay for my own car, insurance, gas, clothes, cell phone ect. I was even able to save enough for a down payment on a house. My parents paid basic tuition and books for college for me. I loved the feeling of indepenance and want my kids to be able to do the same.
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  #16  
June 13th, 2012, 04:39 PM
MommytoaMiracle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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University/college? We will pay for it as much as we can.
Liviing expenses? When they are living in my house, we will pay for everything 100%! When they first move out & need help, we will help. That's what parents are for, in my opinion!
What about a car as a teenager? Yes, although it won't be a brand new car & she will have to earn the right to keep it. Only using it to/from school, work, etc. The minute she abuses it, it's gone.
Cell phone bill? For sure, unless she abuses it. Then it's gone.
Clothes? Yes, in my opinion, it's the parents job to pay for their child's clothes, atleast until the are 18.

However, Savannah will get a job at 16. It's good to start earning your own money, helping with her expenses. I think it teaches responsibility early on.

I'm basing all my answers off the idea that Savannah will be a good little christian teenage girl! haha
If she's a crap head, rebellious naughty teenager, she will get 0 privileges. But as long as she's respectful, mature, & responsible, we will do all of the above, gladly.
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  #17  
June 13th, 2012, 07:08 PM
teacher.123's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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College: My Step-dad and mom started a fund for Savannah. We will cover 2 years at a community college. They will be responsible for the rest.

Car: Hopefully everything is the same, but Adam has a company vehicle and every 3-4 years he gets a new one. We are allowed to buy it out (usually 2,000- 2,700). So we are hoping we can do that for her. It is well maintained and he gets an oil change every month or so. It will just have a lot of miles on it. She will be responsible for gas and part of insurance.

Cell phone: Undecided. Hopefully yes if cheap with a family share plan. If she abuses it by using all the minutes or downloading a bunch of stuff, then she pays.

Clothes: We will buy, but I will not being paying for Express or name brand clothing with high prices. She can get that on her own if she must have it.

Job: Yes she will get a job. I had a job on a working permit and throughout summers. I probably won't let her her work during the week in high school. School comes first. Weekends and Summers are fine.
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  #18  
June 14th, 2012, 12:12 AM
Leogirl's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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University/college? Yes I will help pay for education as much as possible. Nara already has a fund set up.

Liviing expenses? If they want to live at home I will take care of everything. If they want to move out they are on their own unless they really need something.

What about a car as a teenager? I will make sure that they know how to drive and I will pay for permits/licenses but I'm on the fence about a car. If they do get cars it won't be new ones and they will have to help with insurance/upkeep/gas.

Cell phone bill? When they are of age they will have a limited use phone..if they want anything else they will have to pay for it.

Clothes? As children I will buy all of thier clothes. After they are adults I will get things as gifts but other wise they are on thier own.
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  #19  
June 14th, 2012, 02:37 AM
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University/college?
yes, we already have 3 seperate accounts set up. If he decides not to do college we will keep the money for ourselves and go on some awesome vacations.

Liviing expenses?
No, except dorms in college, but I consider that part of college.

What about a car as a teenager?
We have a few cars anyway, but I'm not sure we'll get him one of his own.

Cell phone bill? Clothes?
yes and yes, we consider these necessities.

Have you thought about it?
yes, a lot
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  #20  
June 14th, 2012, 06:49 AM
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I haven't even discussed this with DH yet. I'm sure he would do the whole, "We have plenty of time to think about that" kind of thing since he rarely thinks ahead!

College: I have been putting a small (very small right now) amount aside for her savings. I paid my own way through financial aid and student loans. I would hate for my daughter to have to have student loans like I do. She is going to have to work through high school and college. I want to be able to help as much as we can, but I also think it's important to be independent when you're an adult.

Living expenses: Like a PP said, I greatly enjoyed the college experience. I made lifelong friends and was able to live on my own. I hope that my kids will want to experience that, too. Hopefully we will be able to afford to help pay for that. They will need to work to pay their bills, just like I did. In high school, I had to use my own money for clothes, going out with friends, etc.

Car: Well this is a touchy subject for me! My parents bought my brother his first truck. By the time I was of driving age, my Dad had passed away. In order for me to do Driver's Ed, I had to pay for the course myself and my mom said she didn't have the $$ to help me get a car. So I didn't get my driver's license or a car until after I turned 18 and was going to college. My mom traded in my Dad's truck and got my middle sister a car when she turned 16. Then she helped my youngest sister get a car by paying her down payment and paying half of her car payment every month AND her insurance. So I was the only one who bought all of my cars myself.

So to answer the question: We will probably do what DH's family did. Part of the savings we have for her until she is 18 can go toward a car. You work, save money for a car, and we will match what you save. Hopefully we'll be able to do that for her. Or maybe pay part of her car payment and insurance so that she can divide her paychecks by partial car expenses, partial living expenses, and such. We will figure something out.

Cell Phone: I had to pay for my own cell phone and so will she once she is working. Before that, we will pay for it. You DEFINITELY pay your own cell phone bill after you graduate high school.

Clothes: We'll buy her clothes and then when she is working, she can buy the clothes that she wants. I will NOT buy her clothes when she graduates and moves out.

I think it's SO very important to teach a kid to live within their means and budget. DH and his 2 siblings had debt like crazy because if they wanted something, they used a credit card if they didn't have the money. I am still paying for DH's credit mistakes from before me. I have been working to improve his credit.

So when my kid(s) start working, I will definitely teach them how to budget their paychecks, check their statements, use spreadsheets to keep up with their expenses...whatever I need to do to HELP them be independent.

GREAT question Rachel!
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