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  #1  
March 24th, 2013, 12:00 PM
Dixana's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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The Article


A letter from a father
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Last edited by Dixana; March 24th, 2013 at 12:16 PM.
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  #2  
March 24th, 2013, 02:10 PM
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I totally agree. I don't even like their marketing towards adults. But at least adults have the critical thinking skills to make their own informed decisions. Middle schoolers are at such a vulnerable time in their lives as it is; this is not a socially responsible campaign.
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  #3  
March 24th, 2013, 02:58 PM
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While I don't think there's anything wrong with cute prints and such on undergarments for tween/teens, I don't think that the styles or wording they're using for these or how they are marketing it is appropriate at all. Kids already grow up too fast nowadays, and stuff like this isn't helping at all.
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  #4  
March 24th, 2013, 03:59 PM
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I don't agree with marketing things I deem inappropriate to children, but I'm not too terribly bothered about it. These are the times we live in.
The way I see it is, if you don't want your child to watch a Victoria Secret show that showcases skimpy panties and bras, don't let them watch it. Turn the tv off. So they miss a Justin Beiber performance. They'll live.
I'm not worried about my daughter determining her self-worth and body image based on ads that she may be exposed to. This is where parenting and being surrounded by REAL women come in.
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  #5  
March 24th, 2013, 04:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Rae~ View Post
I don't agree with marketing things I deem inappropriate to children, but I'm not too terribly bothered about it. These are the times we live in.
The way I see it is, if you don't want your child to watch a Victoria Secret show that showcases skimpy panties and bras, don't let them watch it. Turn the tv off. So they miss a Justin Beiber performance. They'll live.
I'm not worried about my daughter determining her self-worth and body image based on ads that she may be exposed to. This is where parenting and being surrounded by REAL women come in.
I do agree that these are the times we live in and that parenting is an important part my daughter developing a good self image and good self esteem.

At the same time, being a tween/teen is hard. Heck I still have self esteem and body issues and I'm 26 years old. It was much worse back then, even with good parenting and far less sexualization of younger and younger girls than there is now in the world. And as much as parents try to keep them from experiencing a lot of it at home, school and the pressure to want to fit in with your peers is a whole different story.

I just don't understand why VS thinks this is a good idea. Do none of them have daughters? Would they let their preteen/young daughters wear the things they're trying to market? I understand them wanting to get customers in the tween/teen demographic, but why not sell things a little less sexy and a little more age appropriate?
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  #6  
March 24th, 2013, 04:50 PM
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They're doing it because there is money to be made in that market. Some people think it's cute and will buy those types of panties for their daughters. They wouldn't waste their time if there wasn't a market for it, and sadly there is.

I agree that being a teen IS hard, but those years will be hard on self-image regardless of marketing. There will always be questions of how you should look, who looks better than you, who is thinner, who is more popular etc as she comes into who she is as a person. It is a natural part of their development and growth into young women. I just don't think it makes life easier to never see those types of ads, and that would not be my purpose of not allowing my child to watch the Victoria Secret show. The purpose is to limit the world's access to my little girl.
It is my job as a mother to help guide her through those years, and to crowd out (or at least balance) the images she sees in the media with images of real women. Women she actually knows.
That's really all I can do because it is apparent that we have little control over what is marketed to our children. These companies are going to get their buck however they can. The only way to eliminate it is to eliminate the market, and since we can't control what other people do in their houses with their own kids, it's just not going to happen.
I know it is difficult during the teen years to deny your child something that others her age may be engaging in with peer pressure and all and the need to fit in, but I have no problem saying no to something like that. The moment we as parents start to let what other kids and their parents are doing influence what we do in our own houses, we have essentially lost them. I won't let the world raise my kid. I have no problem with saying no. NO, you can't watch the VS show. No you can't have the suggestive panties. End of story.
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  #7  
March 24th, 2013, 05:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Rae~ View Post
I don't agree with marketing things I deem inappropriate to children, but I'm not too terribly bothered about it. These are the times we live in.
The way I see it is, if you don't want your child to watch a Victoria Secret show that showcases skimpy panties and bras, don't let them watch it. Turn the tv off. So they miss a Justin Beiber performance. They'll live.
I'm not worried about my daughter determining her self-worth and body image based on ads that she may be exposed to. This is where parenting and being surrounded by REAL women come in.
I agree completely.
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  #8  
March 24th, 2013, 06:40 PM
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Originally Posted by ~Rae~ View Post
They're doing it because there is money to be made in that market. Some people think it's cute and will buy those types of panties for their daughters. They wouldn't waste their time if there wasn't a market for it, and sadly there is.

I agree that being a teen IS hard, but those years will be hard on self-image regardless of marketing. There will always be questions of how you should look, who looks better than you, who is thinner, who is more popular etc as she comes into who she is as a person. It is a natural part of their development and growth into young women. I just don't think it makes life easier to never see those types of ads, and that would not be my purpose of not allowing my child to watch the Victoria Secret show. The purpose is to limit the world's access to my little girl.
It is my job as a mother to help guide her through those years, and to crowd out (or at least balance) the images she sees in the media with images of real women. Women she actually knows.
That's really all I can do because it is apparent that we have little control over what is marketed to our children. These companies are going to get their buck however they can. The only way to eliminate it is to eliminate the market, and since we can't control what other people do in their houses with their own kids, it's just not going to happen.
I know it is difficult during the teen years to deny your child something that others her age may be engaging in with peer pressure and all and the need to fit in, but I have no problem saying no to something like that. The moment we as parents start to let what other kids and their parents are doing influence what we do in our own houses, we have essentially lost them. I won't let the world raise my kid. I have no problem with saying no. NO, you can't watch the VS show. No you can't have the suggestive panties. End of story.
I agree and I intend to raise my daughter the same way.
Its how I was raised as well and I want the same for her.

I think it's unfortunate that young girls get bombarded with all this crap so early on. But it is the way things are and like you said the market isn't going to go away, so we as parents just have to deal with it accordingly. While I am disappointed with VS, I'm not gonna stand outside the store with torches and pitchforks or anything.
I'm going to carry on with my life and with raising my daughter as best I can.
And she's probably going to dislike me as a teenager because there is a lot she's not going to be wearing/doing/going to/ect that she wants to simply because "everyone else is".
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  #9  
March 25th, 2013, 09:54 AM
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Layla will too! I'm sure there will be arguments & tears, but she'll live, & she'll live to thank me when she's older.
When my mom passed, part of my letter to her was thanking her for all the times she said no. I finally understood.
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  #10  
March 25th, 2013, 03:08 PM
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I'm already dealing with the "but everyone else has blank"
If I had a dollar for every time I've told AJ "if you want to do what the neighbour kids do go live with them because that isn't allowed in our house" I could pay this months rent at the very least.
My kids are probably going to flat out hate me as teenagers but I figure if they think I'm their friend I'm not doing my job.


I sincerely wish my children didn't need to grow up in such a highly sexualized world though
Can you imagine what people would have said/done if half the tv shows and commercials aired 50 years ago? My grandpa would have flipped if he saw women crawling around like strippers in their "unmentionables" during prime time tv. He thought the lingerie section of the JCPenney catalog was innapropriate!
My kids won't wear slutty clothing. There will be no half naked posters on their walls. No internet of any kind will be unsupervised.
Yep my kids will probably hate me. But with any luck my son won't be one of those 15 year old boys being prosecuted for child pornography because his gf sent him naked pictures and my daughter won't be like the girl on 20/20 being raped while passed out drunk at what 15? 16?

I think the father who wrote the letter said it all very eloquently.
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  #11  
March 25th, 2013, 03:29 PM
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I think it's NOT cool of VS to market it, but I also just plain won't buy stuff like that for Kaylee. Although I hope she knows by the time she is a preteen that she doesn't have to wear stuff like that to be attractive. Something to work towards
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  #12  
March 25th, 2013, 05:58 PM
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Well working with middle school kids, they are a lot more...sexual than some people think. I have had girls flat out tell me that they don't wear underwear (uh I do not need to know about your underwear or lack of), I've had male and female students say and do things that I just can't believe a middle school kid would say/do...It's shocking.

I don't think it's right to market this kind of underwear to kids of that age, but well...they know they will make money. I won't be buying it for my daughter, that's for sure.
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  #13  
March 25th, 2013, 06:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mandy5586 View Post
Well working with middle school kids, they are a lot more...sexual than some people think. I have had girls flat out tell me that they don't wear underwear (uh I do not need to know about your underwear or lack of), I've had male and female students say and do things that I just can't believe a middle school kid would say/do...It's shocking.

I don't think it's right to market this kind of underwear to kids of that age, but well...they know they will make money. I won't be buying it for my daughter, that's for sure.
Middle schoolers now seem a lot more sexual than they did when I was in middle school. I mean there were a few kids like that but the majority of us didn't seem that way back then. Its been a while so maybe I'm forgetting the finer details of being in middle school though lol.
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