[ClydesdaleCharlotte]

Hi everyone,

I haven’t been on the boards for a while. I spent the first 10 weeks of my pregnancy in a really dark gloomy spot and I feel like I’m finally getting a better. I was experiencing lots of pain and discomfort, along with feeling depressed, it was a living nightmare. I have gone in for a high resolution ultra sound to finally get a due date, February 9th. It was amazing to watch the baby jump, fling its arms around and yawn. I just can’t believe something only 2 inches long can do such amazing things!! I have a few questions for everybody:

1. My midwife has me come in once a month for appointments, this includes a ultrasound. I heard this is really strange and unusual. But according to my insurance the doctor office will not over-do the appointments to cause me to pay anything right out of pocket. Anybody else seeing the doc once a month?
2. Does the baby sense feelings? Like if I’m angry or sad or yelling at somebody (lol) can it feel that tension?
3. When do most women start to show? I have gained about 3lbs, maybe less. But I’m not showing, my pants are definitely snug though.
4. When do cravings start to kick in?

Thanks!

[KerryJo]

I believe seeing the dr every 4 weeks is standard.

[Ravado]

Welcome back! Happy to hear you are in a better place. Hormones do crazy things. I am glad you got to see your baby on the ultrasound. That is amazing.

Here is my best attempt for answers (I am no expert though)

1. My midwife has me come in once a month for appointments, this includes a ultrasound. I heard this is really strange and unusual. But according to my insurance the doctor office will not over-do the appointments to cause me to pay anything right out of pocket. Anybody else seeing the doc once a month?
I do see my doctor about every 4 weeks. Do you get an ultrasound everytime? That might be different as usually they only give you 2-3 unless you are high risk. If they have a reason to do more they will.

2. Does the baby sense feelings? Like if I’m angry or sad or yelling at somebody (lol) can it feel that tension?
I think they do.

3. When do most women start to show? I have gained about 3lbs, maybe less. But I’m not showing, my pants are definitely snug though.
Every women is different. Is this your first pregnancy? With my first I started wearing maternity clothes around 12 weeks and people could really start telling around 20 weeks (though it was obvious to me before that). This time I feel like it is happening quicker which is typical of a second pregnancy.

4. When do cravings start to kick in?
Again, I think this is individual. I never really had crazy cravings. I guess I would crave fruit and an item here or there but not like you read about. I would say if you are going to get them probably anytime after the m/s goes away.

[dari]

I agree with Kerry Jo, appointments every 4 weeks are standard. As far as feelings, I have heard that babies can sense stress ( so much so that they say if you are stressed early in your pregnancy, it increases your chances of having a girl...I don't know if that's true, it's just something I have read).
As far as weight gain goes, you are right on track. They say a gain of 0 to 5 pounds is normal in your first trimester, and then things will pick up in your second trimester.

I'm glad you had a great ultrasound...it certainly puts things in perspective, doesn't it

[mistletoe]

Glad to hear that you are feeling better and got a good look at your little one.
For your questions, as a FTM, most of my answers are based on research, not personal experience, but...

I see the doctor/midwife once a month, up until...um some later week like 30s, then it's every other week. It starts to increase to once a week when I'm close to my due date. For blood tests and specific ultrasounds, I might have a separate appointment because those are gestational-age specific.

Intense emotions -- bad or good -- release natural chemicals into our blood stream. Since the baby is connected to our blood stream, it makes sense that there is some kind of interaction, but I couldn't guess as to how much.

Don't know what's normal for most women, but I'm pretty thin and at 13 weeks I'm sort of starting to show (the change began about at 12 weeks), but it doesn't look like a cute baby bump, just a bloated belly (most of it is bloat) but the difference is that with the uterus now pushing up, that bloat is starting to get higher, so I arch out now starting just below my rib cage.

Cravings? I'm just waiting to be hungry again. But that's just MS and me. I do have this thing for chocolate croissants, but I always had a thing for them.

[sarah*]

Glad your appt went well, i ditto the other ladies every 4 weeks here is also standard we also only get 2 u/s unless you need more for high risk

[spicymustard]

Every 4 weeks for now here.

I did t start to show with my firsr until 26 weeks or so. My clothes stopped fitting me before that but people could not tell i was prego. I showed sooner with the second. I think around 18 weeks.

Cravings, i didnt really have any of anything that i HAD to have. I would say mine were mild to non existent. Its possible you wont have any.

[JaneDoe]

I wanted to comment about the feelings and depression. I do think they can affect the baby (though I don't think the baby would feel the same feelings you do) - however - I don't believe they always make a big impact.

When I was pregnant with DD, at 12 weeks there was a traumatic event, I was scared and anxious, I was afraid for loved ones' safety, my pulse was going a mile a minute and it felt like adrenaline was just coursing through my veins, I was shaking for a little while after things had calmed down, and had trouble sleeping for quite awhile afterwards as I would keep thinking about it. Then throughout the second trimester (and more mildly during the third) I had prenatal depression, very bad (got to the point where I had to have meds that day because I couldn't guarantee I could hold it together one more day). It was a very dark period and I spent a lot of time in bed, with no desire to do anything.

So I was very concerned that either of these incidents could have an effect on DD. But she is the sweetest, happiest, healthiest, smartest little girl. So yes while I imagine it's possible that you being depressed or having other problems with feelings could affect your baby - there is nothing to say that it will, and still every chance that you will end up with a happy, healthy baby, too.

[martilynne]

1. My midwife has me come in once a month for appointments, this includes a ultrasound. I heard this is really strange and unusual. But according to my insurance the doctor office will not over-do the appointments to cause me to pay anything right out of pocket. Anybody else seeing the doc once a month?
I see my OB every 4 weeks until until 32 weeks when I will go every other week and then every week at 36 weeks
2. Does the baby sense feelings? Like if I’m angry or sad or yelling at somebody (lol) can it feel that tension? I think, maybe?
3. When do most women start to show? I have gained about 3lbs, maybe less. But I’m not showing, my pants are definitely snug though. with DS, I didn't start showing until 20+ weeks
4. When do cravings start to kick in?
I also have never HAD to have something. If I feel like eating something, I usually do and write it off as a craving I would never dream of sending DH to get me something in the middle of the night for a craving lol

[chickadee]

I'm sorry you were having such a rough time at the start of your pregnancy - that must have been really hard for you. I'm so happy to read that you're feeling better these days.

You've gotten answers to the other questions, so I'll just respond on the one regarding emotions. I lost a twin at 8 weeks during this pregnancy, and my grief and stress in the week or so following that were extremely high. A physician's assistant at my OB's office kept telling me that I had to relax because the stress was bad for the baby I was still carrying, the one I was terrified I'd lose too - and having her say that (repeatedly!) only upset me further. When I finally spoke to my OB about a week after the loss, he told me that my worry and stress would NOT have any impact on the health of my baby, it would not lead to an increased risk of miscarriage, etc. It was such a relief to know that. Anyway, I'm not sure if the baby can sense your emotions or not - it makes sense to me that at some point the baby could sense those things, for instance after baby can hear and distinguish tones in your voice - but I just wanted to share that any negative feelings you had at the start of your pregnancy should not have had any negative impact on your baby.

I hope the rest of your pregnancy is a happy and healthy time for you.