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I'm gonna say i'm new to this group. Not new to JM but I might have posted once or twice on the forum a long time ago. MY name is Jacqueline and I have two boys, an almost 4 years old and youngest just turned one.
My concern today is about my one year old. From birth, he has been a high needs baby. To this day, he is very clingy, more so than normal. He cries or fusses most of the day. He could be completely happy playing with his older brother and if I even make eye contact with him or walk past him, he starts whinning or grabs onto my pants etc. etc. etc.
MY problem is with bedtime. We cosleep becasue every other sleep situation did not work with him. I don't believe in CIO but on the rare occassion he was in his crib by himself he starts eating the wood on the crib. If he does start to cry, he gets so worked up that he immediately starts gagging before i even get to him. So our sleep situation is that we sidecar his crib which he will not sleep in by the way and thus I call my butt bed because I end up sleeping halfway in his crib while he sprawls out on our bed.
Ok, long story here, sorry BUT... for the longest time, the only way he will go to sleep is by being rocked. We don't have a rocking chair and dH refuses to buy one so i have an infant/toddler rocker that i put him in and he rocks in that and falls asleep to ELMO which is the embarassing part. I don't want him to fall asleep this way but without t.v. he screams and fights his way out of the chair. I have tried putting him in the rocking chair and rocking him while i read to him and that just makes him even more mad. I feel like I have tried eveyrhitng. I've even tried laying in the bed with him to get him to sleep and he just wants to play and walk around and then tries to get down. He doesn't oversleep so i know it's not because he's not tired. He's just difficult.
Does anyone have any suggestions? Sorry this is so long, it's kind of a vent also.
The thing you mentioned that really got my attention was chewing on his crib. Is it possible he's cutting teeth? My oldest would ONLY teethe on her crib for the longest time to the point that we replaced it because she took chunks out of it. If he's uncomfortable that would explain part of his sleeping problems.
Don't be embarrassed that he only falls asleep to Elmo. My oldest would only go to sleep if I had a Barry Manilow CD playing and my son would only go to sleep to certain songs by Michael Jackson. They did grow out of it eventually, but at the time they were getting the sleep that they needed. Maybe you could try rocking him to Elmo and slowly moving further from the TV or gradually playing it lower each night until he starts dozing off without it.
It sounds like he's really keeping your hands full. I'm sorry that I can't offer better advice. Insha'Allah one of the other ladies will be able to be of more help.
Has your son ever been testing for autism? He sounds like he has a lot of the symptoms, inshAllah its not however it may be worth tring to speak to your pediatrian about this. I know that every chils different Allah knows mine DD is way different than my son and has spent many nights in bed even needed a carrier to help her with wanting to wi me so much. I tell you what I think you are doing an awesome job, for one you know his likes and dislikes, you know what works and doesnt work so I think that is step one. As for the rest I say you do what works for now and pray that inshAllah he gets easier to handle as he gets older. T&Ps are with you and your goregous children!!
Thank you Heather(hettyhoo) for my beautiful siggy
Islam Jr. 09-20-2003 * Sumaiya-Alee 09-07-2007 *Angel Baby 01-08-2010