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Forum: May 2013 Playroom

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  #1  
June 25th, 2013, 08:44 AM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Some days (like today) I wonder what I was thinking to upset the nice balance I had with one kid by adding another. I don't think I'm mentally stable enough for two. Too bad there's no rewind button.
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  #2  
June 25th, 2013, 09:03 AM
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Oh Joy don't say that. In all honesty though, I have the same thoughts almost every day, like, what the **** was I thinking!!

I do convince myself it's going to get easier every week/ month.. It got " easier " with our firsts too, no? I am typing this while my 21 mo daughter is screaming and making noises on purpose while I have been trying to put baby to sleep ( for two hours now!) ok she's coming my way now saying ahh pad ( iPad) so better run
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  #3  
June 25th, 2013, 09:06 AM
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I hear you Joy......something is up with Lilah these days and she LITERALLY cries ALL THE TIME when she's awake. NOTHING makes her stop crying. It goes on and on and on, I'm at a total loss of what to do with her. It makes me realize just how EASY it was having only 2 kids - but I really think it's the baby phase. It will get SO much easier once they're older and more independent. It's just so hard now. I'm not, never have been, and never will be a fan of the baby phase. If they could be born as 1 year olds, I'd be all over that! The first year is so hard, and the first 3 months are definitely the hardest. Hang in there, we will get through it!
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  #4  
June 25th, 2013, 09:41 AM
jcperez's Avatar 1 Busy Momma
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It will get better...I PROMISE! My second one gave me a run for my money as well. I still sometimes think now, "What was I thinking?" but I know it will get better....eventually. If it makes you feel any better I totally jinxed myself with one of my posts from the other day and Remy was up like every HOUR last night. Today, so far all he has done is cry.
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  #5  
June 25th, 2013, 11:26 AM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Well, at least I know it's the right decision to not have any more after this!
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  #6  
June 25th, 2013, 11:55 AM
markswife's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I feel this way at least once a week. I also wondered why we had even one kid thus ending our perfectly happy childless life.

We did it because our kids are amazing little people. You have to take the good with the bad but usually, it's more good than bad. I hope tomorrow is better for you
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  #7  
June 25th, 2013, 12:07 PM
Liztastic's Avatar Super Mommy
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While things do get a little crazy, I could not imagine my life without her in the mix or even think about asking about a rewind button, jokingly or not. I really do hope you are seeing a doctor. Your statements are a bit concerning and I feel you are trying to reach out and while we can sympathize that things are crazy we can not get you the help you need for your mental instability.
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  #8  
June 25th, 2013, 12:23 PM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Liz, I'm already on medication, thanks for asking. If you like you can google the effects of sleep deprivation to get an idea how I'm feeling. I'm glad your little girl seems to give you enough sleep so that you never have to feel like I do.
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  #9  
June 25th, 2013, 02:03 PM
ashj_1218's Avatar Hiya!
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It's HARD! Newborns are not for the faint at heart. I am totally with Erin...I would be absolutely fine (aside from pushing that thing out) if babies came out as one-year-olds. I have never been a baby person. Sure, they are cute to look at and cuddle. But they are also tyrants. Little teeny, barfy, screamy tyrants. Who reward you with poop and dark circles. The fun stuff comes after they get out of that stage and into the stage of being little people, with personalities and belly laughs.

You will make it through this. You did it once, you can do it again.

Do you think your meds are working? I know mine go a little haywire when the hormones are doing their thing and I tend to have to stay more on my toes when it comes to the obsessive thoughts. But my counselor did say that LOTS of women have problems with their meds after childbirth or if they have intense PMS (PMDD), so it's worth considering, if you really feel its not taking the edge off properly. But, sleep does play a huge role, so it's really hard to figure out what is going on in that regard. Feel free to PM me if you want to chat. Mental health adds a whole new sector to coping with sleeplessness.
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  #10  
June 25th, 2013, 02:15 PM
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Aw, Joy, I'm sorry things are hard right now. I felt like that the first 3 weeks or so, but I haven't since. I think I had the baby blues, but they went away. Do you think you have PPD? Have you talked to your doctor about it recently? I hope things get better. We're all here to support you.
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  #11  
June 25th, 2013, 03:27 PM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Thanks, ladies. I am in the process of switching my meds because there was the concern that the Wellbutrin was making Kody irritable and wakeful, because of how it works in the body...it's sort of a little bit like an upper I think. So we're switching to Zoloft which I've taken before and know works pretty well, and it has shown to have much lower levels in baby's blood stream in studies on breastfed babies whose moms are taking meds. I could just be having withdrawals from the Wellbutrin, but I had felt pretty good for the first several days of the switch so I'm thinking it's just sleep deprivation. Wonder if Kody is going through withdrawals or reacting to the Zoloft? Grr no way to know for sure.
I pretty much have chronic depression so PPD would be no surprise. Like you said, Ashlee, it's hard to tell which is which.

My dear husband is so sweet, he called my mom and my sister and he arranged to have my mom ferry the kids over to my sis's where they will BOTH spend the night tonight. So I will get as many uninterrupted hours of sleep as I so desire. I am shocked and amazed and a little nervous for my sister, haha. I am so grateful for my family.
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  #12  
June 25th, 2013, 03:38 PM
misty3281's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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A full nights sleep?? I'm jealous! I keep saying I'm going to let Avery spend the night with mom, but I can't imagine actually doing it yet. I hope the rest helps you feel better. I've been having a depressing day feeling like crying all day myself and I couldn't even tell you why. Hopefully tomorrow is better.
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  #13  
June 25th, 2013, 04:23 PM
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Joy, that's awesome! Hopefully a good night's sleep will up give you a fresh perspective!
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  #14  
June 25th, 2013, 05:11 PM
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Take advantage of your family's offers to sleep!! My mom has taken Wyatt a total of three nights since he was born, and will be taking him again in 2 weeks for another night. I always miss him and wish I hadn't left him, but the benefits of a full nights sleep mean more then that night away. If I need a night away from him every couple weeks to be a better, healthier, well rested mom the other 98% of the time I have him- then that's the better choice. There is no shame is making sure you are okay to deal with the kids.

It takes a village!
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  #15  
June 25th, 2013, 06:31 PM
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that's so wonderful, joy! i know i'd be having some really serious problems if my dad didn't take the baby for 3-4 hours in the morning. very sweet of your husband to arrange that for you
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  #16  
June 26th, 2013, 06:41 AM
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That will totally make all the difference for you. DH took the baby for the whole night on Monday and even though I had to wake up to express (totally engorged if I don't!) I have felt like a new person since then. I think the accumulation of so many nights of lack of sleep makes us all feel like we losing our mind. DS actually sleeps very well so I can hardly complain so can't even imagine how you must be feeling. I have total respect for anyone with more than one at the moment! Hang in there! It will get better
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  #17  
June 26th, 2013, 07:55 AM
May 2013 Cohost
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Joy, when is your night without the kids? Was it last night? If so, how was it?!
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  #18  
June 26th, 2013, 10:53 AM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Ahh I slept for 11 1/2 hours with only a couple wakeups, one to pump and a couple times just because I'm used to waking. Got a good 6 hours in at the beginning without even waking up once. I am feeling so relaxed right now. Yesterday evening I took myself out to Red Robin and had an awesome burger, sweet potato fries and a peach milk shake. Yum!

I called my sister this morning and Kody slept all night with only 3 wakeups!! WHAT?!?! I guess bottle feeding is the way to go! At night, anyway. We went to the doctor yesterday and the doc thinks he has a bit of a tongue-tie! So I'm guessing maybe nursing is difficult for him and so he doesn't get all the way full with each feeding and has to wake up often to snack. He never has nursed for a long time. Usually 5 minutes each side. We'll get his frenulum clipped as soon as we get referred to the ENT. Maybe that will help! Meanwhile, he's going to get bottles at night so maybe he'll sleep like that for me! Ethan slept great too, didn't wake up at all. Wow! My sis got lucky, hah.
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  #19  
June 26th, 2013, 11:03 AM
misty3281's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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And again I repeat, I'm jealous. I really can't complain about Avery as far as sleeping goes. She wakes, nurses, and right back to sleep and it's only 2-3 times a night. But the thought of not having to wake at night at all just one night makes my eyes tear up. I've gotta get this child taking a bottle so she can stay with mom one night. So glad you were able to rest well and hope you're feeling better today.
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  #20  
June 26th, 2013, 11:46 AM
Memi's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Really, really glad you are feeling so refreshed and that perhaps you've figured out a solution. Life is so much harder to handle without sleep!
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