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Anyone else with multiple kids sort of feel this way this summer?
Usually I am out ALL the time, I might stay home one day a week but the other days I'm out shopping, or on play dates, or the park, or whatever. Since having Lilah, we are home every day. We might go out on a rare playdate (I've been saying no a lot because I have to hold Lilah the WHOLE time I'm out and if she gets tired it just isn't pretty), but grocery shopping or the park are out the window. I've had a tough time this summer, and a few times DH has come home to me in tears because I have such bad cabin fever. I try to do little things - like today I'm going to cut the grass (we have 2 acres) so I can get some "me" time. Other days when he gets home, I'm go grocery shopping on my own leaving him with the three girls. Or some nights, I'll leave the baby with him and take my older two to the park. Anything we do has to be after 4:40pm though, since that's when he gets home. I am finding it hard to find a balance with three kids - my 2 yr old is in a tantrum phase which does NOT help, then Lilah being a fussy baby is hard too.
I'm with you. I'm housebound too. My husband can usually take my son out around 5 pm most days so he gets some outside time. It sucks. I can't even be the one to take my son out ever bc I have to be here in case she needs a feeding. And if I do have some rare time for him, I'm too exhausted. I can't do playdates because I don't want to worry about breastfeeding Lexi at someone else's house, and her morning nap is pretty set now - I don't want to interfere with it bc I've been burned before. I've gone to the grocery store maybe twice this whole summer with both kids. But my son has some behavioral challenges, so I really don't like to take both kids out alone. My Mom has come over a handful of times to take my son out, but mostly we're on our own. I do take my son to occupational therapy once a week, so that helps kill time and get us out, but then Lexi is off the whole day.
We have done a lot of iPad time this summer which I feel bad about, but luckily school starts soon. I keep reminding myself that this is temporary. And next summer will be different. She'll be done breastfeeding and maybe I can get a sitter for her so I can have one on one time with my son. I think he misses that. I know I do.
Last edited by kary4; August 11th, 2013 at 08:20 AM.
I feel that way too a lot of days. I just started back to work but am only PT so I still have days at home and DH doesn't get home until 6 at the earliest. With a LO and toddler who doesnt always listen or cooperate stayinh home is easier than taking the risk of dragging them around all day but it can get soooo tiring!!!
OMG you have no idea how glad I am to hear I'm not the only one! I feel like a horrible mom because my girls are home ALL the time lately. They watch way too much tv, Lexy plays her Leap pad way too much, and I feel like I get no time with them. I take them outside once or twice a day, as soon as Lilah falls asleep for a nap I take them out and swing them on the swing out the back, they ride bikes, do chalk, whatever....but as soon as she wakes up, even if they're in the middle of playing, we all have to come back in. Lilah is ok in the carrier for a bit outside, but not too long. We've gone on a couple of walks when I knew Lilah was tired, so she'd fall asleep in the Ergo, but we had to be home by the time she wakes because as soon as she wakes up in that thing, she wants out immediately.
Next summer will be way different. They will be walking probably, breastfeeding will be done and we'll be able to get out more for sure I think. I keep telling myself it's just this one summer, but it's still hard. Lexy starts school on the 3rd, and she totally doesn't want to go (she's going into kindergarten, last year she did junior kindergarten....here in Canada we start one year earlier)...so I feel bad that she's had a boring summer and now has to go back to school.
I also feel bad bc I wanted this summer to be the time my son learned how to swim...well I can't take him and a newborn to the pool. I don't even fit into a bathing suit and how the hell would I breastfeed Lexi when my son is a non swimmer? He's only gone to the pool a handful of times, either with my Mom, or on the weekend with his Dad (who is kind of afraid of the water and doesn't teach him to swim, they just play). Also, my son had to get ear tubes surgery in July so he missed out on the pool then. We've been home a lot! I miss the pool myself!
I'm sorry u are all stuck in the house I'm lucky that my kids are 6 yrs apart so I don't have to deal with a toddler and my older one can help also I'm substituting with formula so don't worry about bfing in public I took Joshua swimming yesterday and he loved it was exhausted after it mind u he slept for ages x
Don't feel guilty!! For one, they won't really remember it. For two, it's part of being in a family...stuff changes the game. And for three, it sounds like you are doing everything you can to get them outside and out of the house when you can. Effort counts for a lot!!
I think it's natural to be more housebound as your kid-to-adult ratio goes up. There comes a point where it's just too hard to get everyone out the door at a time when all will behave or be happy. And that's smarter than hauling three, potentially unhappy, children somewhere that will stress you (and maybe others) out. Not a battle that's worthwhile.
Next summer will be better! It's a short term situation. The babies will even be easier and more predictable in 3-4 months. But for now, surrendering to the tide is okay. We are home more too. And I have an easy baby. I can't imagine with a fussy one. My toddler is tantrumy and my preschooler isn't into listening, so those two (with a baby strapped to me) are my challenge. We do a local private park, our backyard, my moms (who has a pool and great bike driveway), and that's pretty much all. Occasionally something fun (zoo, baseball game), but DH goes and "mans" one boy. I take the other and Jo.
I think fall will be better - it will be cooler and I can get her in the stroller more. She will be feeding less often and more predictable. We've gone out to the playground with her in the stroller a couple do times before it got so hot, but the problem is it's so buggy there!
I don't know about being housebound with more kids. We have 10 and I took all 10 grocery shopping yesterday, with 3 carts of food . It definitely can be done. Don't let your kids think it's okay to not have to be able to do family activities, like grocery shopping, it needs to get done.
Just a gentle reminder, tv and such are stimulates to kids, so it may be causing some issues with them. We only do maybe 30 minutes a day of educational shows. The rest of the time is books, puzzles, etc and our kiddos are young also.
Hugs, the first few months can be tough. But look for things you can do! Enjoy the summer, it's so short!
Jesus loving, homeschooling, gardening lover, devoted wife to a wonderful hubby and 10 kids, ages 13 down to 12.5 months . We are expecting number 11 due January 1st, 2015.