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Im torn!


Forum: May 2013 Playroom

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  #1  
August 15th, 2013, 05:01 PM
jcperez's Avatar 1 Busy Momma
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Please share some thoughts... I am so torn right now. I just came back from an interview and Im pretty certain I have the job. I will be a pre-school teacher. This is what I wanted and went to college for but I am not ready to leave the baby yet. I feel like no one will take care of him like I do. I am holding back tears as I type this. I asked if they would have room for him in the infant room so I could bring him but they wont have room until November. I am kind of bummed about the hours as well 8 to 5 pm M thru Friday. Very little days off, only the major holidays and I would have to work the summer. Believe me when I tell you we can use the extra income but it is KILLING me to leave my baby! What if he misses me???! What will I do about nursing?? For 9 hours a day I wont be with him! I wish I didn't have to work but its pretty much work or hear the wrath of my husband like I have been hearing the past year. He isn't exactly understanding at all about how I feel. Those of you working...HOW DO YOU DO IT???? I feel like I wont be able to handle it all. I don't know if I can stand to be away from my baby for that long
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  #2  
August 15th, 2013, 05:08 PM
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That totally sucks. I completely understand. I was supposed to start work this week, part time though, but I just couldn't leave both kids without me quite yet. S I resigned my job ... Again. Well be going back in January.

I also understand the money issue, I haven't had a job since December last year so I am relying in my dh.. He doesn't say anything about it but I have to teach as part of my scholarship and I don't want to lose my scholarship.

Can you take a break from work, like lunch break and go nurse and check on the baby? I'm sorry, I know exactly what you're going through bc I was almost in the same position, I wish there's something I can say to help you feel better, but you've got to do what you've got to do. November will be here before you know it.
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  #3  
August 15th, 2013, 05:28 PM
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Ugh. I really can't tell you what to do. I haven't even left Arthur alone with dh yet! (I've been meaning to, it just hasn't happened)
I can understand the heartbreak completely! I have no idea how moms survive with only 6-12 weeks maternity leave! Is there any way you can find other work in the mean time, ie casual child care in your home, a nanny position that allows you to keep your LO with you, or a daycare etc that has a space for your baby too?
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  #4  
August 15th, 2013, 05:51 PM
LabLover13's Avatar Veteran
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I totally understand how you feel. I go back to work on Monday. I'm really lucky that my mom and DH will be with her the first week...that will help ease me into the transition. From next week onward, we'll have a nanny on Mondays, MIL on Tuesdays, and either DH or I Wed thru Fri.

I really have to look at it like this: It's a necessity for us. I have to go back to work, no question. I am going to really, really enjoy and appreciate the time I DO have with her, and she's going to get the benefit of other faces and voices than just myself. She's going to be well taken care of, I know this. And I'm going to enjoy working hard and socializing with my coworkers.

I'll just keep repeating the above to myself...and send texts to our caregivers any time I need a Claire fix .

I'm sure the first few weeks will be really hard, but a routine will emerge and we will make it work for our family.

Best of luck in whatever decision you make!
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  #5  
August 15th, 2013, 07:55 PM
MrsNHigh's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I go back to school as a teacher next week. I'm not too happy with leaving Carter, but the schedule of a teacher is the best for moms. Will you be ready in a month? Honestly, I say go for it. If it is your dream, do it.
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  #6  
August 15th, 2013, 11:53 PM
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I am in a similar position. I was supposed to go back on Monday, but I am nt returning until September 16th. If I stay at my current daycare, I will put Tiago in the infant room for 3 days a week and he will stay home with my mother-in-law two days a week. BUT! My current job is VERY unprofessinal and rude so I am very irritated by them. From a parents perspective, knowing what I know, I do NOT want to leave my baby there. I have a job interview on Monday. It is for another daycare teaching position. It is slightly further from home so I will noy be able to see him when I go to lunch and he is home. I still di not know the pay or if there is room for Tiago. The thing that is making it difficult is the place I have an interview with is a high claas school in a higher class neighborhood... I feel so stuck right now and so confused...I am hoping the pay of the second place will be my determining factor..
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  #7  
August 16th, 2013, 03:34 AM
jcperez's Avatar 1 Busy Momma
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SunnyBunnyMama View Post
That totally sucks. I completely understand. I was supposed to start work this week, part time though, but I just couldn't leave both kids without me quite yet. S I resigned my job ... Again. Well be going back in January.

I also understand the money issue, I haven't had a job since December last year so I am relying in my dh.. He doesn't say anything about it but I have to teach as part of my scholarship and I don't want to lose my scholarship.

Can you take a break from work, like lunch break and go nurse and check on the baby? I'm sorry, I know exactly what you're going through bc I was almost in the same position, I wish there's something I can say to help you feel better, but you've got to do what you've got to do. November will be here before you know it.
My lunch break will be during naptime. That is time when the teachers will have their lunch and do their curriculum. I live about 15 minutes from the school so going home at lunchtime wouldn't be an option for me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MichelleLynn View Post
I am in a similar position. I was supposed to go back on Monday, but I am nt returning until September 16th. If I stay at my current daycare, I will put Tiago in the infant room for 3 days a week and he will stay home with my mother-in-law two days a week. BUT! My current job is VERY unprofessinal and rude so I am very irritated by them. From a parents perspective, knowing what I know, I do NOT want to leave my baby there. I have a job interview on Monday. It is for another daycare teaching position. It is slightly further from home so I will noy be able to see him when I go to lunch and he is home. I still di not know the pay or if there is room for Tiago. The thing that is making it difficult is the place I have an interview with is a high claas school in a higher class neighborhood... I feel so stuck right now and so confused...I am hoping the pay of the second place will be my determining factor..
I have also worked in a day care and know the deal. Why does it have to be so hard? Good luck with your interview. You should ask if you can bring the baby with you if you get the job.
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  #8  
August 16th, 2013, 03:48 AM
jcperez's Avatar 1 Busy Momma
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LabLover13 View Post
I totally understand how you feel. I go back to work on Monday. I'm really lucky that my mom and DH will be with her the first week...that will help ease me into the transition. From next week onward, we'll have a nanny on Mondays, MIL on Tuesdays, and either DH or I Wed thru Fri.

I really have to look at it like this: It's a necessity for us. I have to go back to work, no question. I am going to really, really enjoy and appreciate the time I DO have with her, and she's going to get the benefit of other faces and voices than just myself. She's going to be well taken care of, I know this. And I'm going to enjoy working hard and socializing with my coworkers.

I'll just keep repeating the above to myself...and send texts to our caregivers any time I need a Claire fix .

I'm sure the first few weeks will be really hard, but a routine will emerge and we will make it work for our family.

Best of luck in whatever decision you make!
Thanks...this makes me feel a little better. I will think of those things as well. I have been telling myself that this is something I NEED to do and have been wanting to do for a long time. Not to mention, we have been needing the extra money and with this extra money we can do more family things and vacations.....Not to mention the holidays are coming up and I have 3 kids. I don't want to have to rely on my husband for money (although, in a perfect world it would be nice) and want to feel like I am independent. I want to give my kids all the things they need, want and deserve. I know in the long run this is a great thing for me. I just don't want to leave my little boy though.I am use to being the one who takes care of the kids. I think its going to be hard for me to let go of that control too and trust that someone other than myself can do it sometimes....
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  #9  
August 16th, 2013, 03:55 AM
jcperez's Avatar 1 Busy Momma
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crunchywannabe View Post
Ugh. I really can't tell you what to do. I haven't even left Arthur alone with dh yet! (I've been meaning to, it just hasn't happened)
I can understand the heartbreak completely! I have no idea how moms survive with only 6-12 weeks maternity leave! Is there any way you can find other work in the mean time, ie casual child care in your home, a nanny position that allows you to keep your LO with you, or a daycare etc that has a space for your baby too?
I don't know how moms do it?? In all honesty, this is actually a great opportunity for me being a pre school teacher. Im afraid to let it go and regret it. I have been on 4 other interviews and this one pays the most and will open more doors for me and give me the experience I need. Its just hard for me to leave him. I KNEW this day would come when I got pregnant. I tell myself, im telling myself its only 2 months then I can bring him with me to the school. I will probably be a crying mess though the first few weeks.
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  #10  
August 16th, 2013, 05:29 AM
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Jessica, is there any way you could wait until next school year to start working? Maybe you could just sub this year?
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  #11  
August 16th, 2013, 05:48 AM
jcperez's Avatar 1 Busy Momma
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kary4 View Post
Jessica, is there any way you could wait until next school year to start working? Maybe you could just sub this year?
The thing with subbing...I would still have to pay for daycare full price somewhere not to mention that with subbing I wouldn't get paid as much as teaching so it wouldn't be worth working at all. If im teaching I would get paid more and wherever I work I can bring him with me and get a discounted rate. That's the idea...
Ive thought of everything...lol
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  #12  
August 16th, 2013, 06:09 AM
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I had to start back working June 1st, which made me so grateful that my job is on call so I don't actually have to leave her unless I'm needed. Just the thought of having to go in would bring me to tears. What I did is before I started back we would bring Avery to my mom to watch for an hour or 2 once or twice a week. It took the pressure off. I could get used to somebody else watching her and not be as stressed because I knew I could go back whenever I wanted to see her. I really think that helped a lot. It was still hard the first couple of times I had to go in to work, but since we had done the trial runs I knew she'd be ok and what I was doing was for the benefit of our family. It's not easy at all, and I still miss her like crazy when I do have to work, but I promise it does get better.
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  #13  
August 16th, 2013, 07:05 PM
jcperez's Avatar 1 Busy Momma
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Funny how things can change in a day! Out of the BLUE I was offered another job today. I am pretty sure I got this job as well. Its for teaching Universal Pre K.! It is about 5 minutes from my house and they have room in the school for the baby who will be 2 classrooms away from mine. The hours are shorter and more flexible AND it goes by the local school schedule so I will have off all the vacation days that my kids get and summers off if I choose! I get an hour break so I can sneak off and see the baby during that time. I am SOOOO much more happier with this. I don't feel like Im leaving the baby all day. Someone upstairs was looking out for me....Im feeling blessed.
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  #14  
August 16th, 2013, 07:12 PM
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That's awesome!! Glad it all worked out for you.
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  #15  
August 16th, 2013, 08:32 PM
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Oh how wonderful! That's such a happy ending! Hooray!
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  #16  
August 16th, 2013, 08:56 PM
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With the time difference I could never make the chats x
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  #17  
August 17th, 2013, 12:20 AM
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That is wonderful!!!!
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  #18  
August 17th, 2013, 02:58 AM
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Wow Jessica! It's crazy how things can Work out so perfectly sometimes! Glad you get to take him with you. It breaks my heart but I have to work. DH did the military and then college and just graduated in June. He stays home with the kids. I soooooo wish more than anything it was me because I feel like I miss out. I'm a teacher and gone 7.5 hours.
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  #19  
August 17th, 2013, 06:04 AM
jcperez's Avatar 1 Busy Momma
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Originally Posted by Skimboardin Mama View Post
Wow Jessica! It's crazy how things can Work out so perfectly sometimes! Glad you get to take him with you. It breaks my heart but I have to work. DH did the military and then college and just graduated in June. He stays home with the kids. I soooooo wish more than anything it was me because I feel like I miss out. I'm a teacher and gone 7.5 hours.
Awww....at least you know the kids are with your husband and in good hands. The original job I was offered was 9 hours a day, couldn't bring the baby til November and NO flexibility at all AND didn't go by the school calendar plus I had to work summers! I was so bummed out. 7.5 hours isn't too bad though. Does your school have all the holiday breaks off and summer off? That's a perk right there.
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  #20  
August 17th, 2013, 07:09 AM
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Wow Jessica, glad it worked out for you!

Now I'm praying that the big man is looking out for me too!
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