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  #1  
January 29th, 2006, 08:30 PM
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When someone asks you if you are going to "try for a boy" does it offend you??

I'm just wondering if I am alone, or if I have just heard this too often lately, but I absolutely HATE it when people ask me if we are going to try for a boy again, because none of our children are here because of us wanting a specific gender. It implies to me that although our family is nice, it's not good enough unless there is a boy in there too. I have wonderfull nephews and I am sure I would have loved having some boys, but I am not upset that I don't have them. I will admit to hoping my third was a boy (because I wanted to have a few of each gender if I were to pick) but as soon as she was born I wouldn't want her any different.

It's so disappointing when you are thrilled with the birth of your daughter and people say "oh that's still okay if she's a girl". I guess people don't really think of how things come across when they say them. ("there's something missing on her" or "are you going to send this one back" is really not that funny)


Just as a note, I am the first to admit I have issues about this!
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  #2  
January 29th, 2006, 08:53 PM
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This has bugged me for awhile and I always thought it was me. I know people mean well but to me it seems rude so I may go off a bit in a second but forgve me.This is probabley my biggest pet peeve. Some asked me after my first girl if I was goivg to try for a boy now. My response was a nice and polite in tone "We may try for another child but we'll be happy with whatever we get." Fast forward 4 kids later and when we told everyone the twins were girls(bringing us to 6 dds) before we even left the house a well meaning cousin asked if we're thinking of trying for a boy after this. I was quite a bit less polite this time only giving him my "death glare" as dh calls it and telling him "If we would decide to try to have another child it wouldn't be with a certain gender in mind. The only goal you should have when you try to get pregnant is to have a healthy baby." For some reason this really pushed my buttons. It just seemed like here we were trying to celebrate and someone feels like they should feel sorry for me and that makes me mad.
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  #3  
January 30th, 2006, 08:05 AM
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not at all dh and hopefully this time around well in a yr or two were still trying for that boy who knows our luck it will probably be another girl but i can say i have twin boys Ronalsd and ryan close to me there in heaven now but i know there with me
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  #4  
January 30th, 2006, 12:08 PM
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No it doesn't bug me at all. I usually tell people that we are hoping to have a boy someday....soon. That and I tell people that I have/had a son.
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  #5  
January 30th, 2006, 01:45 PM
M!che!!e's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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it doesnt bother me but df and i decided that what we get is what we get. we wont specifically have an extra child (right now it looks like we are going for 2) just to see if we get a boy. i would be thrilled either way, as long as the baby is healthy.
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  #6  
January 30th, 2006, 06:23 PM
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yea it doesn't bother me at all either! i'm hoping for a boy my second time. but if we get a girl, of course i'm gonna be happy. i'm just hoping the baby will be healthy.
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  #7  
January 30th, 2006, 06:28 PM
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No it doesnt bother me because I already have a boy. Whatever I get next doesnt matter to me.
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  #8  
January 31st, 2006, 12:08 AM
Mommyof2Girls's Avatar Veteran
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It would bother me if people where disappointed I was having another girl. My step-sister mostly asks me if I'm going to try for a boy someday, I tell her heck no! I only want girls. I know how to take care of them, I don't want to have to learn about the different plumbing, lol. Some people wanted Phoenix to be a boy because then I would have one of each, but I wanted another girl, I was fine with having a boy too, but I think being a single mom with girls will be easier later on. lol, I get off track sometimes if you can't tell. But yeah it bothers me some now and if I was pregnant again or was TTC and people kept asking if I was hoping for a boy this time or acted disappointed about it being a girl again, I would be mad because that's not what really matters.
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  #9  
January 31st, 2006, 10:11 AM
meant2bemommie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Since I had my boy first I had the "are you hoping for a girl" when PG with Carissa and honestly it didn't matter to me and all my next children could be boys or girls and it wouldn't matter than either... doesn't both me when people ask tho.. maybe i like talking to much for it to bother. LOL
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  #10  
January 31st, 2006, 08:02 PM
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Quote:
This has bugged me for awhile and I always thought it was me. I know people mean well but to me it seems rude so I may go off a bit in a second but forgve me.This is probabley my biggest pet peeve. Some asked me after my first girl if I was goivg to try for a boy now. My response was a nice and polite in tone "We may try for another child but we'll be happy with whatever we get." Fast forward 4 kids later and when we told everyone the twins were girls(bringing us to 6 dds) before we even left the house a well meaning cousin asked if we're thinking of trying for a boy after this. I was quite a bit less polite this time only giving him my "death glare" as dh calls it and telling him "If we would decide to try to have another child it wouldn't be with a certain gender in mind. The only goal you should have when you try to get pregnant is to have a healthy baby." For some reason this really pushed my buttons. It just seemed like here we were trying to celebrate and someone feels like they should feel sorry for me and that makes me mad.[/b]

I knew I couldn't be the only one to feel this way. I think it probably irritates us the most because we have large all girl families and we probably hear it wayyyyy more than others with one or two girls (and people that do have a boy in their families already). I can honestly say that the only thing I absolutely do not like about having all girls is the stupid comments.
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