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Has anyone used a doula for past pregnancies? Will you be using one this time around?
I had one for Connor, she was like one test away from her certification, so we got her for really cheap since she wasn't certified yet. She was also pregnant! lol I had a really long, crazy labor, ending after almost 48 hours in a c-section. I felt like every major turn we took, she wasn't there! Not totally her fault, but since she was pregnant, we felt bad and would send her home to rest since we were at the hospital for so long! It was just a coincidence that every time we sent her home, we would come to a decision that had to be made (using drugs, doing an epi, the c/s, etc).
So I'm torn if I want to try another doula this time around. I know I'm going to be trying for a VBAC, and I know I'm going to trying for the natural, med-free birth that Connor was supposed to be. I'm not sure if a VBAC is possible, as it may be my hip/bone structure that led to Connor getting stuck and not being able to deliver him vaginally. Soooo....part of me feels that it might be a waste of money if we end up in the same situation as last time! I know what I want, and I know what I have to do to achieve it, so I just don't know if a doula would be useful for me, ya know?? Ack!! Feel free to share your stories!!
What area of NC are you in? I know a doula here in the Charlotte area. She's pregnant, due in March but she might be able to recommend another doula.
I thought about a doula last time since it was my first time having a NCB. We couldn't afford one, and my labor was super fast that I didn't actually need anyone. I may look into it a little more this pregnancy. Our finances are a little better and I'm not really expecting the same short labor this time. We'll see if I can convince DH. He thinks a doula is some crazy witch doctor lady that brings rags and a stick for me to bite on.
I'm a doula.. I live in Raleigh NC .. I am still working on my certification.. I will have one with this pregnancy.. I didn't with DD bc I didn't know what they were but now I do and I will have one.. They are great and I recommend having one.. Well worth it!
I hadn't planned to use a doula, but when I went into labour, my midwife was at another birth. She sent a doula that she knew ahead of her to help me out, and that woman - whom I'd never even met - turned out to be the biggest help of the entire ordeal. She was so calming and confident and kind. We had a home birth and we didn't pay her anything since we weren't planning on having her there, so my experience was a little different. For me it was wonderful, but I can see why you'd be hesitant to do it again.
I've been very lucky in that I have a lot I friends who are doulas. I had one with DD and she was absolutely essential. She was right by my side through all of it, even in the OR. She kept me calm while DH attended to the baby before they brought her to me. This time my BF is a doula, so she'll be at my birth. I say go for it again! Sounds like you had bad luck this time but if you're going for a VBAC the extra support and advocacy could be really useful.
Eliza Rose, born 6/9/10 ...and getting a little brother for her birthday! Baby Henry Wilder, due 6/7/13
Hey I have a similar story...and we share the same due date too!
I found a doula in my area that was also getting her certification so she didnt cost me anything. Over the months we became friends, and still are. She was pregnant with her 4th child, a boy, who was due 3 months before Drake was so they are buddies now. I had a really long delivery almost 18 hours from when I came into the hospital and she was a wonderful extra help and support for me and my husband. She was still BFing her own son at the time so she pumped during the less stressful times and her husband came to pick up the milk even. She was amazing and wonderful and I know I couldnt have made it through that 4 hour marathon pushing session without her. I attribute her as one of the reasons why I got my med free natural birth as at one point I was close to caving on both an epidural and they were talking c-section since I was having a hard time pushing him out (he was sunny side up and a big baby compared to me) I really would love to have her again but sadly her 3rd child, a daughter who is 6 and shares the same birthday as myself, was diagnosed with leukemia this year and is undergoing treatment for that so I cant think of asking her again for help when she is needed at home and with her own child. I dont know if I want to find someone else to come or just try to do it alone with my husband. My OBGYN is awesome and I really like her and I heard 2nd babies are quicker and easier so maybe I wont need as much help this time. Im still torn at the moment. I guess Ill ask her her thoughts too after I announce.
Last edited by enchantingdragon; November 9th, 2012 at 06:08 PM.
I'm in the Triad, and the doula I used the first time is still in this area, actually, practicing with a group of other doulas. So, I definitely have options, I guess I have a little time to decide anyway! I'm not totally against it, I just wish things would have gone differently the first time around!
I'm so sorry to hear about your doulas little girl, Jasmine! How heartbreaking! I hope the treatments go well and work for her!
I had a doula with DD (she is also a chiropractor so that worked out really well). In any case she was great, but also really expensive (close to a thousand dollars). But it was worth it. She arrived at my house at around 3pm and had dinner with me and then was at the hospital the entire with me until I delivered DD at 9am the next day. She never left my side but she was VERY tired. She really stuck up for me when the doctors were bullying me a bit and I felt so much more confident having someone in my corner. Unfortunately I don't have the money to spend this time around but if I could I would definitely get one again
Mom to my wildchild Kalyna (Dec 2008)