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How did your children react?


Forum: June 2013 Playroom

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  #1  
January 11th, 2013, 10:54 AM
Kalynas_Mom's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 830
For those who have 1 or more children how did your children react when you brought the new baby home? I'm very worried. DD is very very strong willed, stubborn and opinionated. If she doesn't like something you'll know it. Her reactions are intense although she tends to get over things rather quickly. She also thrives on being the center of attention whether at home with DH and I or at a school play trying to be the star. She's pretty much a very dramatic actress who plays her parts exceptionally well
She will be 4.5 when baby is born and VERY much used to having mommy and daddy all to herself (as well as extended family). How was your experience? Is there anything you can recommend I do to prepare her? Is there any books you would recommend (for either her or me?) I keep having horrible feelings that somehow I have wronged her by giving her a sibling. That she won't cope/manage well, and just hate me forever. She really doesn't "like" me lately, and has no problem telling me so and i'm so scared to throw a wedge into what I feel is already a very fragile relationship. We're both hard headed and our personalities clash. DH is very very passive and agreeable and she gravitates to him more than to me because I think her and I are too much alike.
Okay i'm rambling but I mean many many children have siblings and they aren't scarred for life right? haha The way she cried hysterically yesterday and sobbed in my lap when I told her it was a boy was heartbreaking
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  #2  
January 11th, 2013, 10:56 AM
rcjh12's Avatar Nicole
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Kansas
Posts: 1,008
My oldest was only 3, but he was thrilled. At first. And then he realized the baby wouldn't "go home" like the babies that came to visit us with family did, and then he wasn't so sure. lol

But honestly, he did fine. He loved to help me out, bring me things for the baby and even help feed him. He was protective from the beginning. I think it's going to be even more fun this time around because both of my kiddos are old enough to fully grasp the concept.
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  #3  
January 11th, 2013, 10:58 AM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Clovis, CA
Posts: 37,396
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She sounds a lot like my daughter. She loves loves her baby brother. She was so happy to finally have him here. My best advice is to keep her involved as much as possible during the pregnancy. Talk about her getting a brother a lot so much you are sick of hearing it. Read her books about being a big sister. ect. Katelynn was well prepared and could not have been more thrilled to finally have him here.
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  #4  
January 11th, 2013, 12:36 PM
ashleykathleen's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 3,612
Jaleigh was absolutely wonderful when Kiefer was born. Always wanton to hold him and love on him. She is still that way but that is just her personality. She is very loving and laid back.

I'm worried as all get out about Kiefer. He is stubborn, defiant, and not afraid to let you know is something displeases him. It should be interesting...
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  #5  
January 11th, 2013, 02:54 PM
mommy220's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,191
I understand your concerns. My daughter is going to be 5 in February and so she is close to the same age as yours. She is luckily okay with it being a boy or girl (we haven't found out) which I was surprised because she first was adamant that she wanted a girl but would say it was okay if it was a boy, now she is saying she wants a boy but it is okay if it's a girl, LOL. I can't keep up with her! I think that just talking about all the special things she is going to get to do to help and teach her sibling about has helped. Making it kinda seem like it really really involves her. We talk about it a lot. I tell her all about how if she keeps talking to my belly the baby will know her voice when he/she is born. When she is doing something, I mention how it will be fun when she has to teach him/her to do it. Now hopefully it won't be a struggle getting her to back off a little, haha!!

I think I have felt the opposite as you, my dd seems like she is bored sometimes and I feel like it was my mission to give her a sibling. haha Good luck! I think your feelings are totally rational.
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  #6  
January 11th, 2013, 03:02 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 667
I have no advice, but it definitely sounds like I wrote that post. DD and I have that same relationship, we are so much alike. Daddy is the passive one who will bend over backwards for his little girl when she is having one of those two year old moments, and me not so much. I have the same concerns and look forward to hearing the advice of others.
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  #7  
January 11th, 2013, 03:09 PM
Veteran
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 462
I am scared about how my daughter will do with a new sibling as well... *taking notes here*
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  #8  
January 11th, 2013, 03:37 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,786
My oldest ds was 3 and I was worried, but I got him a doll (yes I gave my boy a doll. . . dressed in blue) so we could talk about all the things a baby would mean. He was the first grandchild so he had never been around babies. He loved his baby brother & enjoyed helping me. With ds3 it was the same. Dh and I make sure we have time to spend with the boys individually as much as possible, and we involve them in caring for their siblings. But since ds1 was 3 when ds2 was born and ds2 was 5 when ds3 was born, I'm really worried because ds3 will only be 17 months old. I'm not sure he'll understand all the baby stuff.
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  #9  
January 11th, 2013, 08:16 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 2,153
My two are just 22 months apart. My oldest was not that affected. I am not sure he was old enough to understand. I did snuggle with him while I nursed my second. We kept the routine of our oldest and had our youngest adapt.
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  #10  
January 12th, 2013, 01:30 AM
SassySami's Avatar Crunchy mama
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,078
My oldest kids are 22 months apart. I'm not really sure how Debbie reacted with Kaytie. But here we are almost 8 years later, we survived

Now when Nolan was born, it was heaven for the girls. With this baby, Debbie is annoyed but got over it. Kaytie is very excited but they will also but almost 8 and almost 10 when baby comes. Nolan says baby is toy haha. but they will be 2.5 years apart.

I'm pretty worried about Nolan, he is very attached to me. I'm his mama love, and he is with me all the time. I talk to him about sharing his nu nu's (nursing) and he just gives me the look of, you have got to be kidding me!!

Everything will work out, then you will worry about the arguing and the fighting as they get older
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Sami, married to Joe, mama to Debra (9), Kaydence (7), Nolan (2) and Jarek born 6/26/2013, unassisted at home





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