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Mother-in-Law in Delivery Room??????!!!!!


Forum: June 2013 Playroom

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  #21  
January 23rd, 2013, 10:22 AM
rcjh12's Avatar Nicole
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Kansas
Posts: 1,008
This kind of takes it to the extreme, but I have to laugh because it puts the whole thing into a guy's perspective. (Found on another board I visit):

Quote:
Here's a little visualization technique I like to call Scrotum Squats.
Scenario:
You agreed 9 (10!) months ago to a round of Scrotum Squats. At some time in the next couple of weeks, you will pee yourself or receive some other signal that it is Squats time. You rush to the hospital where a nurse clamps a weight to your scrotum. Every 5 minutes you must do squats for 15 seconds. You can sit in between. (Good luck getting comfortable!) Over time you will have less resting time and longer squatting time. There will be absolutely NO removal of the weight at any time...even if you have to pee. Oh, did I mention you have to do this in a gaping hospital gown? A nurse will come inspect your swelling nuts every once in awhile. (Pray for the gentle one!) After 10 hours, the event will culminate in somebody yanking the clamp off without loosing it. Don't worry, if you tear they will stitch you up!

Optional procedure:
You may invite your FIL to help/witness your Squats. Any time his eyes stray to your tormented balls or he irritates you in any way, your Squats timer has a 1 in 5 chance of increasing by an additional 30 minutes. Please keep in mind that you will be exhausted and in a great deal of discomfort so your irritability will be even higher than usual.

Pay Off:
You agreed to play Scrotum Squats in order to have a lovely little baby with your wonderful wife.

Question:
Do you really think it would be fair for her to whine about wanting her Daddy there while you are busy Squatting your balls off?
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  #22  
January 23rd, 2013, 12:35 PM
zombiemommy's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Charleston SC
Posts: 218
You're having the baby... you make the rules. Anything that is going to distract you or trigger your temper does not need to be there! Totally justified.

I don't want my mother with me... not exactly sure how to go about slipping that in... it's going to be awful, oh my word.
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  #23  
January 23rd, 2013, 04:00 PM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 14,233
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It is totally your right to decide.

My first was premature and I have no idea how it happened but I ended up with a full audience. DH, my dad, and both my MIL and SFIL were in the room... FIL ended up standing behind the doctors, it was terrible. Not to mention extra staff because of the situation. After that I had nobody but DH with me, and the last few times we've had our baby at home with not even a midwife with us.

To me, insisting to let people watch the birth is along the same lines as insisting you let people watch the conception. It's just wrong.
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  #24  
January 23rd, 2013, 04:24 PM
TeresaV's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2012
Location: NY State
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I won't allow anyone in the room except DH, even during labor. I don't want an audience. Especially my MIL.
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  #25  
January 23rd, 2013, 04:57 PM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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Location: Clovis, CA
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I wish my mil was involved enough in our lives to even ask. My mom and friend were there when I delivered David. My husband was deployed. With our daughter it was the same friend husband was out to sea again. With Everett it was my 2 midwives, the same friend, and finally my husband. I was in and out of the shower gave birth naked. It doesn't bother me I thought it would but at that point I do not care lol. But the ladies are right it's your choice.
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  #26  
January 23rd, 2013, 05:09 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Iowa
Posts: 1,511
Amazes me how someone else could ever think they have a 'right' or 'get to decide' who is involved in the birthing process besides the one birthing!! My goodness! It is your whooha on display!! Do not let anyone make you feel bad for your decision.

I like the scenario above ^^ to give DH...lol that should put it in perspective for him
When I had DD we had a group of people in the waiting room, my mom,dad and gma, MIL,FIL,SIL, SIL friend, MIL & FIL 2 friends and we said no one in the room until DD born. I did request my momma in early labor and then kicked her out. I also remember FIL coming in to bring something to us then my dad and I told everyone that tried to come in(even if I told them to bring me something) to get the F*** out of the room and not to come back!! HAHA.

Moral of the story You may want to give even your mom & friend the heads up that you may end up not wanting anyone in the room one the party gets started so not to be offended
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  #27  
January 23rd, 2013, 06:16 PM
QueenCrafty's Avatar Courtney
Join Date: May 2007
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 25,860
I agree that you really should get the final say. With our first, we had lots of people in the waiting room that would pop in during early labor to chat and visit. My MIL walked the hospital halls with me before I got put in a room, but after that she stayed in the waiting room with my parents. My sister and friend stayed with me longer, but I kicked them out once it was time to push. It was just DH and I for the main event and then N hour later, family was able to come back to see Lily. It worked out well for us. With our second, it was such a short labor in the middle of the night that no one showed up at the hospital until the next day. I figured out that I liked that much better. It was like the birth was our little secret for the night. We made phone calls to my mom and MIL but DH and I got to spend some good one on one time with Abri without interruption
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  #28  
January 23rd, 2013, 06:29 PM
zkat's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 3,743
And here s one huge advantage to the scheduled c-section. It's a non-issue. They all are in the waiting room until we are ready for them and then they only get to come back one at a time until I am in my room.

If I had gone into labor, it would be only DH with me. I have a mom, step mom, mil and step mil and you can't allow one without another getting their feelings hurt, so I make easy. None of them.
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  #29  
January 28th, 2013, 11:28 AM
mommy220's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I only had my dh in the room with we had our daughter. I told everyone I did not want them. They were all in the waiting room. At one point, my mom got around the nurses and she came in somehow to "bring" me something I did not ask for or to ask if I needed anything, I don't remember. It still makes me mad because she knew I did not want her there beforehand and she forced her way in thinking in a weak moment I would not say anything. Little did she know it made me so angry I yelled at her to please get out!! We do not have a good relationship and she is the biggest cause of stress in my life so I was annoyed. After we had her, we probably had a good hour (they were stitching me up, etc) and the nurses said that the family (mine and dh's) were basically forcing their way down the hall no matter what and couldn't stop them. So yeah, I have to be very forceful because that is how they are.

I totally agree with that everyone has said, that is YOUR decision.
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