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Dropping and my N-Mom rant


Forum: June 2013 Playroom

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  • 1 Post By zkat
  • 3 Post By MamaSkunk

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  #1  
June 5th, 2013, 05:33 AM
zombiemommy's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Charleston SC
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So... kiddo has dropped over the last few days. I managed to troop through my morning workouts the last two days, but this morning... a no go. I think I might be done with working out until pp. My hips are killing me so bad, its like every step is just painful with lots of pressure. And with his dropping I've had lots and lots of bh's. I'm so ready to be NOT pregnant.

I let my mother know about the dropping and she requested pictures... no big deal. She has last weeks belly photo, so I just sent her one... well... she goes and makes a side by side and puts it on facebook. She put pictures of my naked belly on the internet without my consent asking peoples opinions on whether they think I've dropped when we know that I have. Attention hog, oh my word, I was upset by it. Then after she got off work late last night she made this huge status update and included kiddo's entire name in it for all to see... we were keeping that pretty hush. The only people who know his whole name is you guys, my mother and father and the mil. And she ruined the only thing that I felt like I got to keep for myself. Now every family member and person I've ever known knows and I can just throw our special birth announcements that I spent like 5 hours designing into the trash because they were name reveal type announcements. I'm just so upset at this point that I don't even want her to come up for the birth. Like I'm seriously considering not even calling her until after he is already here. She's 12 hours away and has managed to do all she can to ruin another pregnancy for me. I wish there was some way I could just get my daddy up here.
I am seriously stressing myself out thinking of my narcissistic borderline personality disorder mother and my narcissistic bpd grandmother being in my house for a week while I have a new baby, when I don't even want her (grandmother) here, and I've said so, but... who listens to me. Apparently I'm just a vessel to provide grands and great grands. Someone is going to get their feelings hurt and it's not going to be me.
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12/24/08 - Lilyan Shiloh
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  #2  
June 5th, 2013, 05:57 AM
zkat's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I am sorry she crossed the line. After B1 was born, DH asked all relatives to ask before posting stuff to FB because some of them have like 2,000 friends and we didn't want naked baby pictures out there for every child creeper to grab!

If you don't want them at your house, tell them they are not welcome. The last thing you need to borderline Narcissist stressing you out. If you can't get them out of y our house, just use breast feeding (in your private bedroom with a locked door ) as an excuse for frequent escapes.
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  #3  
June 5th, 2013, 06:16 AM
Rochelle
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I'm sorry she ruined something special for you.
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  #4  
June 5th, 2013, 07:00 AM
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That is super crappy well she ruined it for herself & when she doesn't get to be there she will have no one to blame but herself! I old just call your dad and tell him you would love for him to come but if he brings your mom she is not welcome and will be told not asked to leave
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  #5  
June 5th, 2013, 07:10 AM
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oh my gosh i am so sorry i would be so upset too. she had no right to do that
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  #6  
June 5th, 2013, 07:39 AM
MamaSkunk's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Wow. I would definitely not call her either. I would also say that you don't want her or GMA in your house after babies born. Your home you call the shots. Put your foot down and be firm. Tell her your upset with her. Pics on Facebook of your bare belly was invading your privacy and her revealing the full name was way out of line. Tell her so. (I've had to yell at my own mom over what she puts on FB)

I can completely understand how upset you are. You could also mess with your mom and tell her that you decided to change little guys name because of her reveal. (Obviously your not but it'd serve her right to spend a few days to think this over)
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  #7  
June 5th, 2013, 08:21 AM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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Oh wow huge hugs Hun. That is crazy! I hope that she doesn't ruin anything else.
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  #8  
June 5th, 2013, 08:57 AM
bribugg13's Avatar SAHM to Pirate & Princess
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Definitely crappy, sorry she ruined that special moment for you!
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  #9  
June 5th, 2013, 09:21 AM
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Let her have it! I would if it was my mom.
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  #10  
June 5th, 2013, 10:10 AM
zombiemommy's Avatar Veteran
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I felt a lot better just getting it out, thanks everyone for "listening"!

I plan on having a chat with my mother this afternoon. I'm just so tired of talking with her about things. As far as just getting my father here... my mother is controlling and very selfish... I would hate to see the fallout if he were to actually come here by himself. If she doesn't come, he isn't going anywhere either. I will save him and myself some sanity and not even suggest it, haha!

I have thought about telling her that we've decided on a different name, especially considering that she's went out and bought a ton of monogrammed stuff and things with his name on it... but the first person she would tell would be my father and it would hurt his feelings so bad since we are naming kiddo after him... even to go back later and say it was a joke! just seems harsh, it seems the older my daddy gets the more sensitive and tenderhearted he gets... he takes enough crap from mom, I won't do anything to add to it!
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12/24/08 - Lilyan Shiloh
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  #11  
June 5th, 2013, 10:32 PM
navywifey2003's Avatar Home Birth Mama
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How did the chat go?
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  #12  
June 6th, 2013, 04:55 AM
zombiemommy's Avatar Veteran
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Oh, it didn't go very well.
I guess I'll be seeing my family whenever we go visit after kiddo is here. But even then, my mother said that she probably wouldn't want to see me because I'm so selfish and horrible to her and I constantly try to take away her joy or some colossal steaming pile of crap she spewed out of her mouth. This is normal and something I can deal with.
At least it's done and I know that I most likely won't have to deal with any mess from her until after baby is here. But, I'll cross that bridge when she decides to try to build it on my face, haha.
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12/24/08 - Lilyan Shiloh
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  #13  
June 6th, 2013, 06:41 AM
Kalynas_Mom's Avatar Super Mommy
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Sorry it didn't go well. Sounds like NOT seeing her will work out better for you though. Hopefully by the time you go visit with the baby she'll have gotten over her ridiculous anger....and if not it's entirely her loss
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