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  #1  
December 3rd, 2013, 01:44 PM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 27

Where to start?!?! I have actually been on this journey for 1 year and 8 months now. I had a blog going but had to take it down because my step daughter started asking me questions about it. She apparently was searching around and came across it. I didn't mind her reading about my TTC stuff but I didn't really want their mother in my business so that is why I took it down. Anyways, from the beginning...My name is Danielle, 30 years old. DH is Tracy, 40 years old. I have 2 sons (ages 10 & 7) and 3 stepdaughters (ages 12, 10, & 7). Here is a little timeline....

September 12, 2003 - Brayden was born (with ex-husband)
February 8, 2006 - Calvin was born (with ex-husband)
February 9, 2006 - Had Tubal Ligation
August 21, 2010 - Married Tracy
January 26, 2011 - Tracy adopted Brayden and Calvin
March 27, 2012 - Had Tubal Reversal Surgery

From then on, I used OPK's for awhile. I eventually started temping also. I am the most impatient person you have ever met. So it didn't take long for me to see a specialist. We did our first IUI in November 2012, I believe I had a chemical with that one. Then we did our second IUI in January of 2013, which resulted in . I was getting really discouraged after that so we took some time off. I ended up getting pregnant naturally in March and only made it to 4 weeks. That was hard. It was my first loss. I was so excited to get those two pink lines! After that first loss I didn't know if I wanted to try anymore or not. Of course, those thoughts didn't last very long. We continued to try. I didn't temp with my April cycle because we were in the process of closing on a new house and would be moving so I figured I would be stressed enough. Well, surprise surprise, I ended up getting pregnant that cycle too. We ended up telling our kids after my tests got darker and I had went to the doctor for a beta. The boys are at the age that they think they need to argue and fight with everything that I say and I just felt that if they knew I was pregnant that they would take it easy so that I wouldn't get as stressed. So we told them and only made if a few more days and I started spotting. I went to the doctor and my betas were still getting a little higher. So I waited a few more days and did another beta and it just plummeted. It was over. That time I made it to 6 weeks. Wow...now what? It took me a little while to get over that one.

But the past few months I have renewed energy and I am hoping that we get a Christmas miracle. I had an extremely long cycle last month and am hoping that won't be the case this time. DH and I are talking about trying either another round of IUI or even move on to IVF.

I don't know if anyone will read this or get any good out of it. But it feels good to be able to write this all out and have some place to go to just ramble out my thoughts. It's a nice release.
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Last edited by dlammers; December 4th, 2013 at 10:19 AM.
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  #2  
December 4th, 2013, 08:48 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 28

So yesterday I was messing around with my temps in FF and saw that if my temp went up today and tomorrow it will give me CH for and put me at 5 DPO today. Well my temp dropped a tad today, but if it goes up to at least 97.2 tomorrow then I will get my CH. I really hope it does because our BD timing for that ovulation day would be absolutely perfect! Please oh please Lord, let this be my cycle.
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Last edited by dlammers; December 4th, 2013 at 10:20 AM.
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  #3  
December 4th, 2013, 09:59 PM
Hopolka's Avatar Wife, Mom of 1, Expecting
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: IA
Posts: 2,316
Had no idea about the second loss, I'm so sorry. I took a vacay from JM when my PR turned into a private FB group. I'm so glad to be able to follow your journey now though. FX that this is your cycle and you get to test soon! Also super thrilled to hear that you were able to conceive without IUI the last two times...exciting!! Hopefully you won't have to resort to that this time. ((hugs)) and prayers.
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  #4  
December 6th, 2013, 11:09 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 30...

Still no sign of ovulation. I have had twinges of crampiness but no temp change. But good news is that we have decided to go forward with IVF. Our initial appointment is December 19th...2 weeks!!! I am excited to start that process. Hopefully 2014 will be our year for a child!
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  #5  
December 9th, 2013, 10:58 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 33

Well FF gave me CH this weekend because Saturday my temp hiked up so that would put me at 10 dpo today. But then this morning my temp tanked. So if it goes down anymore then my CH will be taken away. I am at the point that I really don't care at this point. I got confirmation from RE that even if my cycle starts before my appointment on December 19th, I can call on CD 1 and get my pills to start the IVF process. YAY! I was concerned about that. I didn't want to waste another month knowing that if it's a bust this cycle we are going to be moving on to IVF.
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  #6  
December 9th, 2013, 11:14 AM
Hopolka's Avatar Wife, Mom of 1, Expecting
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: IA
Posts: 2,316
FX and prayers sent for the IVF in a little over a week! Pending you aren't PG in the meantime. What would they do then? Would you get an u/s to see? Would they continue with the IVF anyway?
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  #7  
December 9th, 2013, 11:29 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
Well the IVF isn't scheduled yet. You have to be on bcp for 1 month and then the next month is when you take all the hormones and what not to get ready for the transfer. The appointment on the 19th is to set up our plan.
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  #8  
December 10th, 2013, 09:43 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Norfolk, NE
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CD 34 --

I was right, temp went down a little more this morning and my CH are gone. Darn long cycles, they can really annoying!
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  #9  
December 10th, 2013, 09:45 AM
Hopolka's Avatar Wife, Mom of 1, Expecting
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: IA
Posts: 2,316
Sorry your CH are gone but at least you have the IVF scheduling to look forward to now! Only a few more days
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  #10  
December 13th, 2013, 07:53 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 37

I am so over this cycle. I really wish I had "normal" 28 day cycles. Even if my temp skyrockets tomorrow, I still won't get my CH. It's times like this that I wish I didn't temp because I think too much about it. Man, I am just whiny today about all this today. Hopefully things will get better but like I said...I am just over it right now.
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  #11  
December 15th, 2013, 09:50 AM
Hopolka's Avatar Wife, Mom of 1, Expecting
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: IA
Posts: 2,316
So sorry hun. FX it ends soon for you. I stopped temping because of the same stress.
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  #12  
December 16th, 2013, 08:11 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 40

Still no temp shift showing that I O'd. Still took a pg test because, well because I just have a problem I will attach a pic. I always *think* I see something. But I am pretty sure it is a bfn. But on the plus side, it's Monday and only a few more days before I get to go to the RE and get a plan in place for next cycle. I am also looking forward to making sure that I have no cysts. I have occasional cramping and just worry that that is what it is. Anyways, here is my test from this am
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  #13  
December 17th, 2013, 09:30 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
Cd 41

waiting, waiting, waiting....That is what I am doing. I just wish SOMETHING would happen. No O, no AF. I really wish it was Thursday so that I can talk to the doc about this. 2 more days...just 2 more days.
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  #14  
December 17th, 2013, 10:04 AM
Hopolka's Avatar Wife, Mom of 1, Expecting
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: IA
Posts: 2,316
I definitely see a line of some nature on that PG test. Not sure if it has color or not. Have you tested since?
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  #15  
December 17th, 2013, 10:33 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
I tested yesterday with SMU with an FRER and I am pretty sure it is either the indent or evap. A picture is in the forum. Other than that, no I haven't tested since then.
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  #16  
December 18th, 2013, 11:57 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 42

Nothing new to report with my cycle. BUT tomorrow we go to Omaha for our appointment to discuss IVF!!! YAY! They are also going to do an ultrasound to make sure I don't have any cysts. I am hoping if it all looks good and it doesn't indicate that I am going to be ovulating soon, they will give me something to jump start my cycle. Otherwise, if it is like last cycle, we are looking at another month before my next cycle starts. BOO! Just want some answers and get on with IVF since my body doesn't want to allow me to make a baby naturally. I will update tomorrow afternoon after we get back, hopefully with all good news.
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  #17  
December 19th, 2013, 12:34 PM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 43

Had my appointment today. Got a plan in place and even though we still have waiting to do. I am pretty happy with it. Next cycle will be blood work, a hysteroscopy, and an SA for Tracy. Then the cycle after that (February)will be birth control pills. Then the 3rd cycle, which should be in March sometime, will be retrieval and transfer time! The doctor says I am a good candidate for IVF and he seemed hopeful. I am excited and looking forward to this journey!
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  #18  
December 23rd, 2013, 10:31 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 47

I don't have anything new to say. I am not temping anymore. Just waiting for af to show so I can go get my blood work done.
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  #19  
January 2nd, 2014, 11:41 AM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
CD 57.............

Yup you read it right, still on the same cycle! My boobs started hurting pretty bad yesterday with very sensitive nipples, so I am assuming that AF is on her way. My boobs always get sore before af, but it sucks because I have never had this sensitive of nipples except for the last time that I was pregnant. My **** body is just really starting to p**s me off! At this rate it will summer before I get to move on to IVF. I really hope that my cycles are not this long in the coming months.
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  #20  
January 3rd, 2014, 01:27 PM
dlammers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Norfolk, NE
Posts: 2,900
Oh man...I am just so stupid. I took a test because of how I am feeling (sore boobs and very sensitive nipples) and I think I see something. I hate that I do this to myself. I am pretty sure it's a bfn but of course I keep looking at it and convince myself that there is a faint line. I am beyond frustrated with myself for putting myself through this.

On another note...I am at that point again with my job that I just hate it. I have to have a job and this one is a good one to have because I can pretty much take off any day I need to, which will be good when/if we do IVF but I get so bored! Thank god for facebook games and just mommies because otherwise I would just sit here and stare. I really wish that I would have enough guts to quit and find something that I can keep busy at but I feel so guilty even thinking about it. The people I work with are really nice and I don't want them to have to find somebody to replace me and have to retrain them. I know some people think I am crazy that I don't want to stay at a job like this, but the thing is, when you go home almost everyday feeling worthless because you did absolutely nothing all day, sometimes it's not even worth it. I would like to see those people laughing at my complaining sit and do nothing for 8 hours straight. Yeah, one day of it is tolerable, but multiple days in a row sucks!

Ok...end of rant. That was all I needed to say. Thanks for *listening*.
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