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I need to talk about this so I can stop obsessing :(


Forum: August 2013 Playroom

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  • 2 Post By JessKeller24
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  #1  
April 9th, 2013, 07:52 AM
Fins's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: San Diego
Posts: 990
I am beyond, irrationally terrified of SIDS. Seriously, it's all I think about and I need to get over this because when the baby comes I can't stay awake 24/7 to make sure he's breathing.

Is it worth it to get the motion monitors, do they work and what else can I do to ease my mind? (other than the regular safety tips of bedding, etc.)
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  #2  
April 9th, 2013, 07:55 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 2,580
I have the angel care monitor and it was the only thing that gave me true piece of mind when Maddie was little. You better believe I will be using it again.

You aren't alone being terrified of SIDS.
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  #3  
April 9th, 2013, 07:58 AM
Anchored's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Virginia
Posts: 5,693
I think anything that'll ease your mind is worth the money!!!! *hugs*

I just follow the guidelines very strictly (back to sleep, no bumpers, no bed sharing, no smoking around baby-- we don't smoke anyway but we don't allow anyone else to, going to do my darndest to breastfeed, etc). I understand your fears though! We lost my cousin to SIDS 31 years ago and it's something that's always on my mind. Luckily the understanding of it has come further since then and we do have the guidelines at least
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  #4  
April 9th, 2013, 08:11 AM
JessKeller24's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: PA
Posts: 3,861
I know your fears, I have 2 close friends that lost babies in there sleep. One was my SOs son at 13 months, it wasnt due to SIDS though. And then my older two kiddos half sister from SIDS at 3 months. It scares the crap out of me, but I know there's nothing I can do, I can take measures to reduce the risk, but if it happens its going to happen. I bed share because I've seen studies say it reduces the risk because baby can hear/feel you breathe and it reminds them to, also because god forbid my baby did pass from SIDS I'd rather baby be in bed with me than alone in a crib. You can get a monitor but from what I understand if its true SIDS and they stop breathing you can't bring them back (not sure if its true, anyone have any info on that?)
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  #5  
April 9th, 2013, 08:20 AM
Dandelion's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Neverland
Posts: 2,726
I'm sorry you are dealing with this it is a very scary thought. We keep baby away from smoke and sleeping on back with no blankets. We DO bed share but very safely. I feel safer with baby right there where I can tell what's going on.
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  #6  
April 9th, 2013, 01:11 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 594
With my DS he was every day of a year before I wasn't scared to go check him in the morning that I'd find him blue and not breathing. I was going to get an angel monitor just for peace of mind, but I have a friend who used one with her premie daughter and it would go off for no reason about once a week.
It's a legitimate fear. SIDS is so out of our control.
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  #7  
April 9th, 2013, 01:27 PM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 6,905
SIDS always scares me, too, especially as I know someone personally who lost a child due to "SIDS" (really, though, it could have been from pronlonged CIO. She thought the baby had just "given up" crying and went to bed, but in reality she had died). Co-sleeping has given me peace of mind, but seriously, my kids are 5, 6, and 7 now and I still check on them when they are sleeping, so I'm not the person to help with this

FWIW, SIDS used to be "Cot Death" and "Crib Death" but the crib companies didn't like so much... Co-sleepin (WHEN DONE CORRECTLY AND SAFELY) reduces the risks, though, for reasons already pointed out by others.

"The rate of SIDS is lowest in cultures that traditionally share sleep"
http://www.parenting.com/article/ask...-a-sids-danger

"The numbers in the largest study on cosleeping around the world suggest that safe cosleeping reduces SIDS!"
http://thebabybond.com/Cosleeping&SIDSFactSheet.html

"Co-sleeping is Safer Than Cribs Says SIDS Researcher James McKenna"
http://www.inhabitots.com/co-sleepin...james-mckenna/

"Why babies should never sleep alone: A review
of the co-sleeping controversy in relation to SIDS,
bedsharing and breast feeding
James J. McKenna*
and Thomas McDade
PAEDIATRIC RESPIRATORY REVIEWS"
http://www.naturalchild.org/james_mc...cosleeping.pdf
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Last edited by alittlelost; April 9th, 2013 at 01:39 PM.
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  #8  
April 9th, 2013, 02:00 PM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 6,905
Here is the information also on the link between CIO and SIDS and the link between CIO and brain damage:

'Leaving a baby to cry evokes physiological responses that increase stress hormones. Crying infants experience an increase in heart rate, body temperature and blood pressure. These reactions are likely to result in overheating and, along with vomiting due to extreme distress, could pose a potential risk of SIDS in vulnerable infants. There may also be longer-term emotional effects. There is compelling evidence that increased levels of stress hormones may cause permanent changes in the stress responses of the infant's developing brain. These changes then affect memory, attention, and emotion, and can trigger an elevated response to stress throughout life, including a predisposition to later anxiety and depressive disorders. English psychotherapist, Sue Gerhardt, author of Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby's Brain, explains that when a baby is upset, the hypothalamus produces cortisol. In normal amounts cortisol is fine, but if a baby is exposed for too long or too often to stressful situations (such as being left to cry) its brain becomes flooded with cortisol and it will then either over- or under-produce cortisol whenever the child is exposed to stress. Too much cortisol is linked to depression and fearfulness; too little to emotional detachment and aggression."
The Con of Controlled Crying - The Natural Child Project

More info:
Dangers of

"A recent study looking at the immediate and long-term physiologic consequences of infant crying suggests otherwise. The following changes due to infant crying have been documented: increased heart rate and blood pressure, reduced oxygen level, elevated cerebral blood pressure, depleted energy reserves and oxygen, interrupted mother-infant interaction, brain injury, and cardiac dysfunction."
Cry it Out (CIO) - Atachment Parenting - Leave Baby to Cry

"Harmful physiologic changes
Animal and human research has shown when separated from parents, infants and children show unstable temperatures, heart arrhythmias, and decreased REM sleep (the stage of sleep that promotes brain development). "
Science Says: Excessive Crying Could Be Harmful | Ask Dr. Sears®

"When babies are stressed, their bodies release the hormone cortisol, which can damage or even destroy neurons in their still-developing brains, researchers at Yale University and Harvard Medical School have found. That can lead to a higher incidence of ADHD, poor academic performance, and anti-social tendencies. "
Yahoo! Shine - Women's Lifestyle | Healthy Living and Fashion Blogs

And Ferber sets the record straight on his method:
"Even Dr. Richard Ferber, whose sleep-training method is commonly called the Cry It Out Method, says that he never intended parents to completely ignore their babies' nighttime tears.

Say's Dr Ferber in an interview: "I've always believed that there are many solutions to sleep problems, and that every family and every child is unique," he said in an interview with BabyTalk. "People want one easy solution, but there's no such thing. I never encouraged parents to let their babies cry it out, but one of the many treatment styles I described in my book is gradual extinction, where you delay your response time to your baby's wakings. I went to great pains in the second edition to clarify that that treatment is not appropriate for every sleep issue, of which there are many."

Yahoo! Shine - Women's Lifestyle | Healthy Living and Fashion Blogs


anyway, this is no judgment against those who do CIO, because that's their business and doesn't impact the health, life, or future of my own children, but for those concerned with SIDS I share this information because it's one thing we parents CAN do to reduce the risk of SIDS
kenasmommy07 likes this.
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Thank you Jaidynsmum for the beautiful siggy!
Check out the Attachment Parenting Board for Effective Parenting Solutions.
PM me if have questions about autism, TTC gender swaying, natural childbirth, going "vaccine-free", or if you are looking for gentle discipline advice.
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  #9  
April 9th, 2013, 02:00 PM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 6,905
Here is the information also on the link between CIO and SIDS and the link between CIO and brain damage:

'Leaving a baby to cry evokes physiological responses that increase stress hormones. Crying infants experience an increase in heart rate, body temperature and blood pressure. These reactions are likely to result in overheating and, along with vomiting due to extreme distress, could pose a potential risk of SIDS in vulnerable infants. There may also be longer-term emotional effects. There is compelling evidence that increased levels of stress hormones may cause permanent changes in the stress responses of the infant's developing brain. These changes then affect memory, attention, and emotion, and can trigger an elevated response to stress throughout life, including a predisposition to later anxiety and depressive disorders. English psychotherapist, Sue Gerhardt, author of Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby's Brain, explains that when a baby is upset, the hypothalamus produces cortisol. In normal amounts cortisol is fine, but if a baby is exposed for too long or too often to stressful situations (such as being left to cry) its brain becomes flooded with cortisol and it will then either over- or under-produce cortisol whenever the child is exposed to stress. Too much cortisol is linked to depression and fearfulness; too little to emotional detachment and aggression."
The Con of Controlled Crying - The Natural Child Project

More info:
Dangers of

"A recent study looking at the immediate and long-term physiologic consequences of infant crying suggests otherwise. The following changes due to infant crying have been documented: increased heart rate and blood pressure, reduced oxygen level, elevated cerebral blood pressure, depleted energy reserves and oxygen, interrupted mother-infant interaction, brain injury, and cardiac dysfunction."
Cry it Out (CIO) - Atachment Parenting - Leave Baby to Cry

"Harmful physiologic changes
Animal and human research has shown when separated from parents, infants and children show unstable temperatures, heart arrhythmias, and decreased REM sleep (the stage of sleep that promotes brain development). "
Science Says: Excessive Crying Could Be Harmful | Ask Dr. Sears®

"When babies are stressed, their bodies release the hormone cortisol, which can damage or even destroy neurons in their still-developing brains, researchers at Yale University and Harvard Medical School have found. That can lead to a higher incidence of ADHD, poor academic performance, and anti-social tendencies. "
Yahoo! Shine - Women's Lifestyle | Healthy Living and Fashion Blogs

And Ferber sets the record straight on his method:
"Even Dr. Richard Ferber, whose sleep-training method is commonly called the Cry It Out Method, says that he never intended parents to completely ignore their babies' nighttime tears.

Say's Dr Ferber in an interview: "I've always believed that there are many solutions to sleep problems, and that every family and every child is unique," he said in an interview with BabyTalk. "People want one easy solution, but there's no such thing. I never encouraged parents to let their babies cry it out, but one of the many treatment styles I described in my book is gradual extinction, where you delay your response time to your baby's wakings. I went to great pains in the second edition to clarify that that treatment is not appropriate for every sleep issue, of which there are many."

Yahoo! Shine - Women's Lifestyle | Healthy Living and Fashion Blogs


anyway, this is no judgment against those who do CIO, because that's their business and doesn't impact the health, life, or future of my own children, but for those concerned with SIDS I share this information because it's one thing we parents CAN do to reduce the risk of SIDS
__________________
Thank you Jaidynsmum for the beautiful siggy!
Check out the Attachment Parenting Board for Effective Parenting Solutions.
PM me if have questions about autism, TTC gender swaying, natural childbirth, going "vaccine-free", or if you are looking for gentle discipline advice.
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  #10  
April 9th, 2013, 02:19 PM
KASHWORTH's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Arizona
Posts: 4,198
I think it's something all mamas worry about. I still check DS to make sure he's breathing and freak out if I wake up late and he's still sleeping. We did co-sleep for the first 6+ months and it helped me sleep to be able to feel/hear him breathing right away if I woke up so I could just go back to sleep. After we bed shared he moved to a pack n play right next to us until I felt better about moving him to his crib.
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  #11  
April 9th, 2013, 05:25 PM
ElliotsMommy13's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Seattle
Posts: 2,668
I understand the fear. One of my first purchases was a baby monitor. I really wanted a video one but then I found the Angelcare systems that monitor movement. They do have one with video but it is soo expensive. I went with the sound only one that monitors movement around $80 and have gotten a little piece of mind.
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  #12  
April 9th, 2013, 08:00 PM
carolinashore's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Virginia
Posts: 487
I don't have experience with the monitors, but you're definitely not alone in your worries. With my first DS, he started out in a bassinet next to my side of the bed. I kept a small flashlight on my nightstand so I could check on him whenever I woke up (in other words, a lot). With my second, I followed all the precautions and tried to not worry as much. I still check their breathing, and they're 7 and 4 now
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  #13  
April 9th, 2013, 08:39 PM
Regular
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 70
I had the Angelcare with my DD, and it was great. Rationally I know it doesn't reduce any risks, but it helped me sleep better at night by helping me not obsess. We follow all the guidelines and don't bed share because we're both big people, but DD slept beside me in the co-sleeper until she outgrew it at five months, then she slept in a crib in our room for another few months.

It can take some tweaking to get the sensitivity right, but I think that overall the Angelcare is great for parents.

And in response to the question about what to do if baby stops breathing, we're definitely doing infant CPR before the baby comes.
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