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No, you are absolutely great! That is so nice that the hospital had a place for you to stay. I don't think ours has anything like that. My doctor told me a couple weeks ago, though, that if I deliver any time after 36 weeks, the babies will likely come home with me. There might be complications, of course, but that's what I'm aiming for. (36 weeks is only 1 week away! That is crazy!)
Any advice for surviving sleep deprivation while caring for an older child (my DS will be 4 in October) and twin babies? That's my newest worry. Lol.
I was told the same thing...after 36 weeks it was likely that they would have no NICU time, but we've had many twins on JM born between 35 and 36 weeks who go home without NICU time. You are doing so great!!
I'm not gonna lie...having twins and a toddler is pretty rough, especially at first! The first 6 months were just survival mode. I remember one day when the babies were sleeping, I put a Thomas the Train DVD on, put Claire (she had just turned 2 when the babies were born) in a pack-n-play in front of the TV, and collapsed on the couch for a half hour...it felt amazing and kept me going for another day. I don't know if I have any great advice, but for sure if you have any family or friends offering help...take it!! If they ask what you need, suggest them cooking you a meal. Mow your yard. Have them take your toddler to the park or something for a bit. Don't be afraid to tell them what you need...people wouldn't ask if they didn't want to help! My DH wasn't much help at night because he has to get sleep to work (he is a pilot). He did, though, always get up with the kids on Saturdays so I could sleep in. Sometimes just knowing that I would have that opportunity kept me going. And don't sweat the small stuff...your house doesn't have to be spotless, you don't have to cook gourmet meals, you don't have to have everything on your list done. Just do the basics at first.
At night if one baby wakes to feed, wake the other one. I know they say not to wake a sleeping baby, but trust me...do it! Otherwise as soon as the first one is done and back to sleep, the other one will wake and you'll never get any rest.
I have an awesome oldest DD and she adjusted better than I thought possible, but we did have rough days. The best piece of advice anyone ever gave me was to vocalize when you are putting them first. The older kid always feels like you are putting them off to tend to the babies and they get really frustrated with that. So, for example, if you are making the older child lunch and a baby cries, say out loud, "I hear you Baby. I'm getting Toddler's sandwich ready right now because he/she is very hungry. I'll come get you as soon as I'm done." The baby, of course, doesn't understand, but it really helps the toddler recognize when you are putting them first and it makes them feel important. I found it to be really helpful.
Ah, here I go again writing a novel You'll get LOTS of advice from people about how to handle your twins and a toddler. Nod and smile a lot...most people haven't been there and have no clue what it is like. Just do whatever is best for your family and don't worry about all those folks.
And there's light at the end of the tunnel. My toddler (just turned 3) and the twins (11 months this weekend) are all napping right now so I can type this
Melissa - Mama of IVF babies Claire (3), George (1), and Abigail (1)
That is a lot of wonderful advice, thank you! I hope I can especially remember to vocalize when I'm putting DS's needs first. I know that will help him understand a lot better. It does help that he's almost 4, but at the same time, he's almost 4 and never had to share mommy. I'm really, REALLY grateful too that he still takes awesome naps (consistently from 1-4 or 5, every day). I'm hoping the chances will be good most days that I can get the twins asleep during that time. Fingers crossed.
I am really excited for these babies, but I am definitely getting nervous. Lol.
Mamaruth, any advice? Like I said I'm nervous about a c-section, mostly because it is completely new territory for me.
Any "no one warned me about that!!!" things you can think of? I always feel more comfortable about something when I know as much as possible, so share away.
My main advice is that as soon as you can, get up and walk. My recovery was rough the first time because I didn't know about the walking and also, keep up on your meds. My recovery the second time around was easier since I was up walking as soon as they let me and by the second week out, I was just taking the prescription Ibueprofen. If you are a larger woman pre-pregnancy, you run the risk of the incision splitting open a little bit (no one warned me about that); so just be careful!