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I think I'll be shocked either way.......UPDATED


Forum: September 2013 Playroom

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  #21  
March 30th, 2013, 02:24 AM
mommy2lilmen's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I know you love her, heck you picked her colors! Thsts awesome. Cry, take all the time. I have btdt a couple times and I fear I to will be crying if I hear boy again! Hugs
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Sean 16, Justin 13, Kevin 11, Jayson 10, Bryce 4, Seth 3 & Kade 1
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Blessed with 1 Autistic and 1 Down Syndrome child
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Alyssa Marie Jade
September 1, 2013 @ 11:01pm 6lb 8oz & 18.5in
Emerg C Sec, Down Syndrome blessing, AVSD, Hirschsprungs, G tube
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  #22  
March 30th, 2013, 06:50 AM
Keakie's Avatar Learning to walk in faith
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Gender disappointment doesn't make you a bad mama! Take whatever time to work through it that you need to. I may have to process some too - we'll know soon.

Congratulations on a healthy little one, though!
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  #23  
March 30th, 2013, 03:42 PM
cincy1luv's Avatar 1st time mommy
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Congratulations on the girl!!

Don't feel bad mama! ((Hugs))
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  #24  
March 30th, 2013, 04:43 PM
mirdeemrlvs's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I do really appreciate your kind words ladies. I am feeling a little better today. I talked to my friend this morning who has 6 girls. She understands! The only difference is she is much younger and mega fertile!

I went through all my girl stuff today and sorted it. My little girls were getting excited about their sister. I guess I'm real worried about tomorrow because we will tell my inlaws and family about the baby (they don't know yet) and I just don't want to hear their less than enthusiastic reactions. It's hard enough to deal with it. Also, my SIL's baby (boy) was born a couple of weeks ago, so that'll be a little difficult. So, please say a prayer for me for strength.

Also, I txt'd my sister and told her she was having a niece. She said, oh, I was hoping for a nephew, but congratulations! I know she means well, but there's no one but me who wanted it more. I guess I'm just not looking forward to telling everyone and hearing their reactions.
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  #25  
March 30th, 2013, 05:56 PM
Keakie's Avatar Learning to walk in faith
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I hope tomorrow goes well. I'll be sending you lots of positive thoughts! Some of those reactions would leave me feeling a little put out too. I'm sorry you're having to deal with others' gender disappointment on top of your own.

Would you like me to add you to the gender teams list? If you'd rather hold off until you're feeling better that's fine but I wanted to offer.
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  #26  
March 30th, 2013, 10:35 PM
mirdeemrlvs's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keakie View Post
I hope tomorrow goes well. I'll be sending you lots of positive thoughts! Some of those reactions would leave me feeling a little put out too. I'm sorry you're having to deal with others' gender disappointment on top of your own.

Would you like me to add you to the gender teams list? If you'd rather hold off until you're feeling better that's fine but I wanted to offer.
Gender teams list? Sure. I'm having a GIRL!!! :-) and I'm going to be happy about it!
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  #27  
April 1st, 2013, 01:20 PM
WorkerBeeMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Congrats on the healthy baby!

I understand you being dissapointed and it is totally normal and does not make you a bad mom at all!

For my own reasons, I really wanted another girl this time. Like really bad. I have come around to the idea of having a boy because I really just feel like it will be a boy and it will be okay. After two girls, I am honestly kinda scared to have a boy. If a month or 6 weeks ago I was told for sure I was having a boy, I would have cried or had a panic attack. But now I am warming up to the idea and I honestly can say that today, I don't care what I get. With both my girls I wanted boys and got girls, and I am thankful for that because I love them to death and girls are awesome, but I too was dissapointed then, although not to the extent I would have been a month or two ago.

One night I prayed and asked the universe to give me what it thought would be the best for my family, and I think that helped me to surrender a little bit.

Now, in two weeks when I get my maternit21 results, I may just end up crying, but we will see.

Hugs!!
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  #28  
April 1st, 2013, 05:17 PM
LauraS214's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Congrats!!!
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  #29  
April 2nd, 2013, 08:06 AM
MandersM's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Glad you are coming around xo
Congratulations on a healthy little one...regardless of gender!
And I just wanted to add you are entitled to your tears & adjustment time. But you know you will love this little baby girl to bits when she gets here!!
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3rd GP Appt: 02-21 - due to spotting, still no hb
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NPT U/S: 03/15 - got a wave from our LO!! And all looks well. We went public!!
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  #30  
April 2nd, 2013, 08:30 AM
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Gender threads were getting me down and I had stayed away from this thread. I am kicking myself now as I could have related so much and supported you so much!! My NT scan shows a clear girl nub shot and the ramzi's theory also predicted girl for me. I am trying so hard at this point to accept that its a girl and not hold out hope for a boy. Because that would only shatter me more! I have one girl and this is it for us. We are definitely not planning on having another one. DH is serious about getting snipped after this baby. mama. I totally understand what you are going through. Gender disappointment is very real and a very ok thing to experience. It definitely does not make you a bad mom. Take your time in coming to terms with it.
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  #31  
April 2nd, 2013, 08:45 AM
AmbzAsh's Avatar Little Miss Sunshine
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mirdeemrlvs View Post
Also, I txt'd my sister and told her she was having a niece. She said, oh, I was hoping for a nephew, but congratulations! I know she means well, but there's no one but me who wanted it more. I guess I'm just not looking forward to telling everyone and hearing their reactions.
First of all, congratulations on a healthy baby girl!

Second, I CAN sympathize with you. You are not a bad mama at all! I think gender disappointment is just a normal part of pregnancy and it does NOT make you a bad mama or make your love her any less. I too was so badly hoping for a girl. My bf and both of our families all wanted a girl. Everyone was just convinced that we were having a girl. I've wanted a little girl for as long as I can possibly remember. So when the U/S tech told us that he is 90% sure it's a boy and showed us the boy parts, I will admit that I was VERY upset and disappointed. The comment that your sister made is pretty much identical to all of the reactions we have gotten from everyone in my bf's family and some of my family as well. The good ol "Oh, well, congrats. I was really hoping it was a girl though. I really wanted to you to have a girl. What are we going to do with another boy?" WTH do you mean?! YOU wanted me to have a girl?! Well what the hell do you think I wanted?! We even have people saying "Don't buy anything yet! I'm holding out for those 'boy parts' to actually be girl parts that are just swollen." Some people just won't accept the fact that we saw a big ol wee wee and are 90% sure it's a boy. Overtime, I have come to terms with having a boy and am now actually very excited have my little man! I am so stinkin excited and I can't wait to meet him!

Just give it time mama Just think of how beautiful that sweet little girl is going to be....her cute little nose, her itty bitty fingers and toes, little cheeks and bright eyes.... and think about that unconditional love that she is going to give you Give yourself time to process it all....as much time as you need And just keep telling yourself that you AREN'T a bad mama...not one single bit!
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  #32  
April 2nd, 2013, 09:45 AM
mirdeemrlvs's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AmbzAsh View Post
First of all, congratulations on a healthy baby girl!

Second, I CAN sympathize with you. You are not a bad mama at all! I think gender disappointment is just a normal part of pregnancy and it does NOT make you a bad mama or make your love her any less. I too was so badly hoping for a girl. My bf and both of our families all wanted a girl. Everyone was just convinced that we were having a girl. I've wanted a little girl for as long as I can possibly remember. So when the U/S tech told us that he is 90% sure it's a boy and showed us the boy parts, I will admit that I was VERY upset and disappointed. The comment that your sister made is pretty much identical to all of the reactions we have gotten from everyone in my bf's family and some of my family as well. The good ol "Oh, well, congrats. I was really hoping it was a girl though. I really wanted to you to have a girl. What are we going to do with another boy?" WTH do you mean?! YOU wanted me to have a girl?! Well what the hell do you think I wanted?! We even have people saying "Don't buy anything yet! I'm holding out for those 'boy parts' to actually be girl parts that are just swollen." Some people just won't accept the fact that we saw a big ol wee wee and are 90% sure it's a boy. Overtime, I have come to terms with having a boy and am now actually very excited have my little man! I am so stinkin excited and I can't wait to meet him!

Just give it time mama Just think of how beautiful that sweet little girl is going to be....her cute little nose, her itty bitty fingers and toes, little cheeks and bright eyes.... and think about that unconditional love that she is going to give you Give yourself time to process it all....as much time as you need And just keep telling yourself that you AREN'T a bad mama...not one single bit!
Thanks AmbzAsh... I am doing SO much better now. I knew it would take about two days and it did. You know, my mom when I told her said that one of my sister's ex- family members had girl ultrasounds her whole pregnancy, and then she had a BOY!! I took it in for a second and then said, NO MOM... I'm having a GIRL and I just need to accept that!!!! I think she got the point and doesn't refer to the baby as boy or girl anymore. I know people are well-meaning and they need time too to adjust to the sex of the baby....it's just hard to deal with your disappointment on top of everyone else's.

My husband has three sisters. He has an uncle who has one (grown up) girl. We are the only ones to be able to "carry on the name" or have a boy with the family name... so there's a little pressure. But, this is the end of the road for us unless I have another one right away at 44 and I can't imagine that!!!!! my SIL did have a baby boy and is not married though, so he has the family name.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anitha View Post
Gender threads were getting me down and I had stayed away from this thread. I am kicking myself now as I could have related so much and supported you so much!! My NT scan shows a clear girl nub shot and the ramzi's theory also predicted girl for me. I am trying so hard at this point to accept that its a girl and not hold out hope for a boy. Because that would only shatter me more! I have one girl and this is it for us. We are definitely not planning on having another one. DH is serious about getting snipped after this baby. mama. I totally understand what you are going through. Gender disappointment is very real and a very ok thing to experience. It definitely does not make you a bad mom. Take your time in coming to terms with it.
I tried to tell myself to not be upset if it's a girl and kept telling myself "it could be a girl" but I honestly was NOT prepared as my old instinct which is always wrong kept telling me I was having a boy. When I spoke to my friend who has 6 girls, no boys, she said that it is so healthy to grieve and mourn the loss of the baby you thought you were going to have. It's better to deal with it then take it out on your child after it is born. So true. I had a rough couple of days, but I am glad I "dealt" with my feelings rather than pushing them aside.
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  #33  
April 2nd, 2013, 09:55 AM
kelbert's Avatar a.k.a. Kelli
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I'm glad you are doing better..

Since this is our first I didn't really have a preference. But my family kinda did. My DH's side is ALL boys.. and my side is ALL girls.. the only boy is adopted! At the gender reveal my sister made blue or pink necklaces for people to wear for their guess. My dad had on blue because he was hoping! But he was happy with either in the end. I do understand on wanting to please everyone.. but it just won't happen.

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  #34  
April 2nd, 2013, 10:26 AM
Grlsshp9's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Awww, Congrats on a healthy baby girl!!!
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