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Isn't it funny how life works out?


Forum: October 2013 Playroom

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  • 1 Post By drewbears

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  #1  
February 6th, 2013, 01:38 PM
KellJoO's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3,962
The "how old are you" thread got me thinking.....

I am 26 and I will be 27 when Baby arrives. Growing up, I had always wanted to be done having kids by the age of 25. But life tends to have its own plans for us- and I am a firm believer in the idea that we all have a destiny- and its usually NEVER how we intend things to go. I'm totally ok with it too.

My story- I was already married.....and now I'm divorced. Luckily- given the situation, no children happened during that marriage. I wanted kids until about the time I got married- then everything changed. I Didn't want them anymore and was actually strongly against it. My DH at the time changed drastically after we got married-was angry about everything and never happy with anything he had. Money hungry.

I divorced him when I was 24. Married 3 short years. But, I had been with him since I was 15 and thought I was in love.

Along came my DF. We arent technically even engaged, he's just my boyfriend, but we have plans to get married so I call him DF. I've known him since we were kids- and our parents were actually good friends.

I knew, from the moment that we started dating- that I wanted kids again. It was like everything just changed- and I was back to being ME and I knew what I wanted again. I knew what made me happy again. Starting fresh was scary- especially having been in ONE relationship so long. I swear you should never get married before you're 25. You grow up so much in that time frame.

So here I am- 26...pregnant, unmarried, but VERY happy with where I am in life right now. Not at all what I had planned or how I thought things would go- but its ok.

Anyone else feel this way?
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  #2  
February 6th, 2013, 02:14 PM
estherm's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 1,459
I agree things change thats for sure!!

I am glad you found your soul mate


I happened to find mine when I was 15 and for us its an awesome thing with many bumps along the way ( Growing pains you may say I am actually older than DH..

I am currently 27 and he is 25 and we are baby number three

For us it has worked out wonderfully but I know for others once the growing up has happened things are different.

Es
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  #3  
February 6th, 2013, 02:21 PM
anothermother's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Southwest, Missouri
Posts: 6,062
I too agree that you change so much in those early twenties. I did, and my husband did. But we got so lucky that we married the right one because we changed together and have a stronger marriage because of it. I do know a lot of people who aren't quite as lucky and it's heartbreaking to watch. I'm so sorry that you had to go through that... But I'm glad you are out of it and are utterly happy
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  #4  
February 6th, 2013, 02:28 PM
drewbears's Avatar Mom to 8 AWESOME kids!
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Location: Delaware
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I've been feeling like its funny how things turn out often.

I said we would be done having kids by the time I was 25.... Almost 10 years later, little did I know.
Lotsakids likes this.
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  #5  
February 6th, 2013, 02:58 PM
Miss Bliss's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 221
Quote:
Originally Posted by KellJoO View Post
The "how old are you" thread got me thinking.....

I am 26 and I will be 27 when Baby arrives. Growing up, I had always wanted to be done having kids by the age of 25. But life tends to have its own plans for us- and I am a firm believer in the idea that we all have a destiny- and its usually NEVER how we intend things to go. I'm totally ok with it too.

My story- I was already married.....and now I'm divorced. Luckily- given the situation, no children happened during that marriage. I wanted kids until about the time I got married- then everything changed. I Didn't want them anymore and was actually strongly against it. My DH at the time changed drastically after we got married-was angry about everything and never happy with anything he had. Money hungry.

I divorced him when I was 24. Married 3 short years. But, I had been with him since I was 15 and thought I was in love.

Along came my DF. We arent technically even engaged, he's just my boyfriend, but we have plans to get married so I call him DF. I've known him since we were kids- and our parents were actually good friends.

I knew, from the moment that we started dating- that I wanted kids again. It was like everything just changed- and I was back to being ME and I knew what I wanted again. I knew what made me happy again. Starting fresh was scary- especially having been in ONE relationship so long. I swear you should never get married before you're 25. You grow up so much in that time frame.

So here I am- 26...pregnant, unmarried, but VERY happy with where I am in life right now. Not at all what I had planned or how I thought things would go- but its ok.

Anyone else feel this way?
I kind of have a very similar situation. I am also divorced....married young too. I had 2 kids with my ex, and after I left him I thought I never wanted anymore kids. As soon as I met my husband I changed my mind. I also said I'd never get remarried so..... Just shows how your feelings can change like that. I'm happy for you....it feels so good to be in the right place finally...especially after being in the wrong one for so long.
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  #6  
February 6th, 2013, 04:24 PM
MarchMom2007's Avatar Sticky baby wanted!
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 3,175
So happy for you. I totally didn't plan for life to work out as it did for me. I thought I would be done having kids by age 30 at the latest, and I ended up having my first at 33 and will be 39 when this one is born. I never thought in my wildest dreams that it would work out this way, but I am with my absolute soul mate (who is not the father to my first, but treats him like his own) and I am over the moon to be having a second at this point in my life.
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  #7  
February 6th, 2013, 04:34 PM
soul_donut's Avatar Melissa
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,110
These stories are great, ladies I am happy for everyone finding love!

I met my DH when I was 21 and we married when I was 26. We both changed a lot in that time and I'm glad we didn't rush an engagement. I'm very glad we didn't rush with a baby, either - I'm 29 and wasn't really ready until I got to this age. I feel very fortunate that life has gone generally in the direction that I'd like it to go. I have a lot of ground to cover with my career, but my dream has always been to have my own family, and I am very satisfied. When I was younger, I didn't know whether my life plan would work out because I never really met anyone that I wanted to be in a relationship with.. I am very picky :-D
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