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This is a poem that I love. A friend shared it with me when I was expecting #2 and feeling guilty there would only be 25 months between them, that #1's whole world was about to be turned upside down, etc. It chokes me up to read it and think how now my 3rd son will be 2 when the 4th is born and his whole world will be flipped around...but at least I can look at my older ones and know it'll be ok and before long they'll be best friends (even if they won't admit it!).
As I walk along holding your 2-year-old hand, basking in the glow of our magical relationship. Suddenly I feel a kick from within, as if to remind me that our time alone is limited. And I wonder: How could I ever love another child as I love you?
Then she is born, and I watch you. I watch the pain you feel at having to share me as you've never shared me before. I hear you telling me in your own way, "Please love only me" And I hear myself telling you in mine,"I can't," knowing, in fact, that I never can again.
You cry. I cry with you. I almost see our new baby as an intruder on the precious relationship we once shared. A relationship we can never quite have again.
But then, barely noticing, I find myself attached to that new being, and feeling almost guilty. I'm afraid to let you see me enjoying her -- as though I am betraying you.
But then I notice your resentment change, first to curiosity, then to protectiveness, finally to genuine affection.
More days pass, and we are settling into a new routine. The memory of days with just the two of us is fading fast. But something else is replacing those wonderful times we shared, just we two.
There are new times -- only now, we are three. I watch the love between you grow, the way you look at each other, touch each other. I watch how she adores you -- as I have for so long. I see how excited you are by each of her new accomplishments.
And I begin to realize that I haven't taken something from you, I've given something to you. I notice that I am no longer afraid to share my love openly with both of you. I find that my love for each of you is as different as you are, but equally strong.
And my question is finally answered, to my amazement. Yes, I can love another child as much as I love you -- only differently.
And although I realize that you may have to share my time, I now know you'll never share my love. There's enough of that for both of you -- you each have your own supply.
I love you -- both. And I thank you both for blessing my life.
Landon (12/05) Logan (01/08) Keighan (05/11)
Kerrigan Grace is due in September 2014!
2 angel babies 2/2013 and 8/2013
Gee, thanks for making me cry We have being TTC #2 for a long time, but I still have mixed feelings. I am the younger sibling, so I know younger siblings are awesome, but it is hard to imagine loving another child as much and to imagine taking attention away from my daughter.