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Negativity gets me so down! OT vent inside


Forum: October 2013 Playroom

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  • 4 Post By Allisonjuly
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  #1  
March 5th, 2013, 08:17 AM
drewbears's Avatar Mom to 8 AWESOME kids!
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So.... I live in a small community, and being involved with soccer, makes it even smaller. Lets just say there often ends up being cliques, and jealous moms who feel their kids are the best and don't understand why they are not picked out of the crowd and get ugly with those who are.

Well I know I had mentioned here before that my daughter was invited to join a US national soccer team to play over in England this summer.

Well the trip is not cheap... she has to fundraise. She is baby sitting, saving any money she gets for birthday and christmas and just anything extra she gets here or there. We sat down with people involved in our soccer club and it was suggested she write a letter to send to people she personally knows as well as businesses to get sponsors and raise as much money as she can.

Well I know there are people that just don't like our family, or the opportunities that my daughter has gotten. obviously those people would not be ones we would even think about sending a letter to. I will also say I HATE fundraising....

well I ran into someone today that I know has issues with us and she was ugly about it. She was like oh I saw kimmys letter... I dunno how, as we didn't send one to them, nor anyone else that she "hangs" with. And she says, when will you just say no? there are other people that turned it down, why couldnt you? Um... okay... I just smiled and said, well I am not a fan of fundraising and it is what it is and walked away.

I am SOOOOOOOOO bugged by this now. I know her and another lady who I used to think was my BFF, but we had a huge falling out and I truly believe it had to do with soccer. This friend got all nasty saying that I had no morals, and that I take hand outs and blah blah.... long story, but its been almost a year since that happened and I am still very upset over it.

So now I have in my mind thinking... how many people are talking crap about us saying we are looking for hand outs?? GRRRRRRR
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  #2  
March 5th, 2013, 10:17 AM
MrsHoot's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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That is mean and ridiculous! Women can be so catty sometimes. sorry you are dealing with this!
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  #3  
March 5th, 2013, 10:21 AM
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I live in a small community as well, so I know exactly what you are going through. I'm sorry, it does suck I have come to the conclusion that you can never please people, no matter what. You know that saying, "You're ****** if you do, you're ****** if you don't?" That is exactly how it is living here! I just keep away from most people and stick to my choices, regardless.

Sending you lots of HUGS!!!
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  #4  
March 5th, 2013, 11:30 AM
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Unless you have your hand out to her she needs to keep her fat mouth shut!

We used to live near a family with 10 kids. We loved them. They needed help all the time and when possible we helped. I noticed sometimes people seemed jealous about it. I just don't get it.

"Say no" does that mean she thinks because you can't afford it your dd doesn't deserve to go? My ds has an expensive opportunity to attend a summer program through duke university. I don't care that its too much... He earned it, he deserves it.

If opportunities were only given to "only" children or children from well off families we wouldn't be tapping into the best of the best.
Anitha, Wren, QL1516 and 1 others like this.
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  #5  
March 5th, 2013, 01:17 PM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
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I think I would have asked if the woman was jealous. lol There's nothing wrong with having to save up for something just because you don't have it in the bank at the moment. My goodness, she must be hot **** herself to be able to get anything she wants on a whim!
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  #6  
March 5th, 2013, 02:20 PM
Wren's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I guess she thinks only rich kids deserve to play soccer?? People just love to judge other people's choices because it makes them feel better about themselves. I absolutely hate fundraising but it is an important skill to have for a lot of careers too, so it is good experience for your daughter.
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  #7  
March 5th, 2013, 02:33 PM
MarchMom2007's Avatar Sticky baby wanted!
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Wow, what a crass, nasty reaction! Your talented daughter most certainly deserves this once in a lifetime opportunity. Yes, fund raising is not the most fun thing in the world, but she at least deserves the chance to try to get there. Good for her for all of her hard work and talent, and good for you for keeping biting your tongue when she said that to you. Not sure I would have been able to do the same.
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  #8  
March 5th, 2013, 03:37 PM
Lotsakids's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I hope your daughter has an awesome time!! My hubby as a teenager had the opportunity to go to the states & play basketball, but his parents couldn't afford it. I know that it still really bugs him to this day
Focus on the end result, (your daughter going & how incredible it's going to be for her,) & don't give these people a second thought.
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  #9  
March 5th, 2013, 03:42 PM
2Corinthians10:4's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm so sorry you are going through this. I am from a small community as well but thankfully for the most part my community seems to embrace the opportunities that any child is given and tries to help them out. I hope your daughter doesn't have to hear any of the negativity
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  #10  
March 5th, 2013, 05:22 PM
Julie
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That is so crappy of her! Your daughter obviously deserves to go. There's no harm in fundraising-if certain people don't want to contribute, then they don't have to. Don't worry about what other peoplethink or say about you, it's not worth your time!
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  #11  
March 6th, 2013, 07:18 AM
drewbears's Avatar Mom to 8 AWESOME kids!
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People can be petty. Heck if I had a friend or someone I knew that had this chance and was doing the same thing I would help out!

We could im sure cover the trip on our own, it would mean a lot of cutting back and trying, but if she can learn something out of this by writing the letters and putting herself out there, this will help her later in life like in highschool when she is looking at college and asking for grants and such.
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  #12  
March 6th, 2013, 07:38 AM
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Small towns are rough! Sorry
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  #13  
March 6th, 2013, 07:39 AM
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Don't pay attention to people like her. She is just plain jealous and wants to take away your happiness at having chosen to encourage your daughter.
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  #14  
March 6th, 2013, 04:13 PM
drewbears's Avatar Mom to 8 AWESOME kids!
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My daughter just sent out 110+ letters so now we cross our fingers! Thanks ladies for the support and kind words. It's nice to be able to vent.
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