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Pink Scares Me


Forum: October 2013 Playroom

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  • 1 Post By curlimama05
  • 2 Post By Seasaidh
  • 1 Post By Lemon
  • 2 Post By MarchMom2007
  • 2 Post By Iluvmybabies*
  • 3 Post By Effervescence
  • 1 Post By jadeunicorn

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  #1  
March 5th, 2013, 12:47 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Iowa
Posts: 5,286
My Dh and the rest of my family has their fingers crossed for a girl. I stare longingly at the frilly clothes, but honestly, I'm not a girly girl and there are alot of little girls who would drive me bonkers. (In my daycare). Is it normal to feel this way?
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  #2  
March 5th, 2013, 01:13 PM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Freaking Louisiana
Posts: 7,707
I did not want girls! A little girl doesn't worry me; they're easier than little boys. It's the teens. It's the embarrassment of explaining pads and tampons, and it'll be my job for the sex talk! Ugh...

I didn't like pink with my first cause ALL THE GIRL CLOTHES WERE PINK! I don't get pink for my second cause the first has nothing but pink clothes. lol So my second has a closet full of purple.
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  #3  
March 5th, 2013, 01:46 PM
"Shay-see"
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: CA
Posts: 1,082
I'm instating a policy against gendered clothing no matter which sex we have - at least until the kids are old enough to make their own clothing choices. I hate the idea of gender roles being prescribed to my kids. They can figure out for themselves who they want to be.

I won't do the pink bows until I'm asked for them, and if I have a boy and he's the one who wants them, so be it.

... and as far as "the talk" about girl parts and boy parts and all the ways they work - no issue there. I work in neuroscience research which means I routinely have to stomach things much squickier than a discussion about human reproduction. It'll be the functional equivalent of teaching how to sort laundry.

ETA: OP, i think it's totally normal to feel this way. Girls are often encouraged (by parents/society/whathaveyou) to conform to a pretty specific personality type and to constantly obsess about their looks and clothing - which can be very tiresome for people who aren't like that. Fortunately you don't have to feed into it. You can encourage any daughters you have to try different things, and if they still end up girly, well, that's clearly just how they are and I promise you'll love them anyway.
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  #4  
March 5th, 2013, 01:54 PM
~ ttc island baby #3 ~
Join Date: Feb 2013
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I will be honest and tell you that with my first, I was convinced I was having a boy. Not so much because of any instincts, but because I wanted a boy!!! There was no convincing me that I would have a girl. Well, I now have two little girls and they are my world!!! I couldn't imagine not having my girls. Yes, I would still like that one little boy (so maybe this is my chance?), but if they tell me I'm having another girl, I'll be just as thrilled!!!

On the subject of PINK - I am not a fan of it either, but there are a lot of other girly clothes that are not pink, but just as cute, if not cuter!!!
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  #5  
March 5th, 2013, 01:56 PM
sweety_pie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Canada
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I'm not girly girl at all, but I love having a little girl!
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  #6  
March 5th, 2013, 02:03 PM
Lemon's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Florida
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My son has been a dream compared to my daughter, lol. But it's probably just her temperament.
My son is my sweet protector. He follows the rules, is easy to please.
My daughter is hell on wheels. She has personality plus. I love her to pieces, and I love shopping for her and doing girly stuff. But she is a little tornado!!

That said, I'm glad I've had the chance to have one of each.
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  #7  
March 5th, 2013, 02:05 PM
soul_donut's Avatar Melissa
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,110
I wonder about this too, because I wasn't a super girly girl growing up, and things that my nieces are into (horses, princesses, etc) just really, really don't interest me. I was a lego kid, always in sports etc and while those aren't necessarily boyish things, they're a far cry from waiting in line for 2 hours to see the Disney princesses, you know? I think though that your kids will go with the flow and if you don't inundate with pink stuff they won't be as into it.

My first baby picture I was wearing a baseball uniform - I fully intend on buying the same exact outfit for my baby's first picture, boy or girl.
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  #8  
March 5th, 2013, 02:08 PM
MarchMom2007's Avatar Sticky baby wanted!
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I am terrified of pink too. I will definitely raise this child the way that I raised my son, which is with very gender neutral clothing until he/she expresses interest in whatever they want to wear. My son was VERY into pink, frilly, sparkly things for a while and he had a closet full of pretty dresses that he wore everywhere. He had sparkly light up princess shoes, and a pink tulle tutu that he loved to wear. He has since outgrown it, but still likes pink things. He actually wears pull-ups to bed and always prefers the pink "girl" ones to the blue "boy" ones.

Now if this is a girl, and she has a preference for princessy things, I will allow it to a point, but not the Disney version. I just like that my son will proudly state "Pink is not a girl color, it is just a color". Hoping to do that again with this one.
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  #9  
March 5th, 2013, 02:26 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Iowa
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I think it's the drama that scares me. My sisters are very moody and my DH's niece just looks for opportunities to make her brother and cousins mad. And the girls in my daycare can be very moody and mean. One of them screeches at the other kids at the drop of a hat and she's in kindergarten!
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  #10  
March 5th, 2013, 03:48 PM
Lotsakids's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Australia
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Honestly? I am not a girly girl at all. And that said none of my girls are overly 'girly.'
Personally I find the girls easier than the boys. Even the teenage ones. Period & sex talks? Really not that scary in the grand scheme of things.
My girls talk to me about anything. We have close relationships, & I love the fact that they are not scared to come to me when something is bothering them, no matter how serious the issue is.
The boys on the other hand, are horses of a different colour. I adore them, but I definitely don't understand where they are coming from most of the time!
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  #11  
March 5th, 2013, 03:49 PM
Iluvmybabies*'s Avatar Proud Mama to 5 girls
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Blue scares me lol

After 4 pink I'm not scared
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  #12  
March 5th, 2013, 04:23 PM
Effervescence's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I am not girly. I don't wear make up, don't have fancy clothes. I did ballet when I was little, but it didn't define me, and that was really as girly as it got for me (my brother did ballet too, so it didn't seem like a "girl" thing to me, I just thought it was fun!) With my daughter, and my son, while there are times when gender stereotypes are followed (usually for photo ops, or if someone gifts them something... my aunt buys very gender stereotypical items) we as parents have encouraged them to explore many interests. The trucks are for both kids, the dolls are for both kids, the tutus in the dress up center are for both kids. As it turns out, I have a very girly girl who happens to like wearing a Browns football helmet around. I also have a very boyish boy who likes to pirouette in a tutu and have his nails painted.

I thought I was going to be a lousy mom to a girl... to a girly girl, anyway. But,here's the thing. You adapt to what your kids like. Your kid wants to wait two hours in line to see Princess Merida, you just do it and don't think twice, because she's your daughter. Your son wants to play hockey? You wake up at 4am to drive him to skating practice every morning, and you learn the rules of the game so you can follow it, because he's your son. You will adapt, whether you have a girly girl or a tom boy or a boyish boy or a femenine boy. You just kind of go with it, because you don't want to break their heart by not having interest in what they are. At least that is my experience....
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  #13  
March 5th, 2013, 04:43 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3,127
I'm not a girly girl either, and I dislike pink. When we found out our first was going to be a girl (which I was happy about, as I DID want a girl for my first - lol), we didn't tell anyone (aside from a couple people we knew would listen to the "no pink" rule) until the actual baby shower.

This way, everyone had bought the gifts already and didn't shower us with pink clothes. We actually announced it via the cake, which said, "It's a girl!"
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  #14  
March 5th, 2013, 05:01 PM
~ ttc island baby #3 ~
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Effervescence View Post
But,here's the thing. You adapt to what your kids like. Your kid wants to wait two hours in line to see Princess Merida, you just do it and don't think twice, because she's your daughter. Your son wants to play hockey? You wake up at 4am to drive him to skating practice every morning, and you learn the rules of the game so you can follow it, because he's your son. You will adapt, whether you have a girly girl or a tom boy or a boyish boy or a femenine boy. You just kind of go with it, because you don't want to break their heart by not having interest in what they are. At least that is my experience....
I completely agree with this!!!
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  #15  
March 5th, 2013, 07:13 PM
Leah
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,839
I just wanted to say that I think the BTDT mom responses here are awesome.

This is definitely making me think about how much we guide our LOs and will our future LOs. I'm hoping I can impart to any little girl that she has every right to be totally comfortable as a princess or a football player or both should she so choose. And the opposite holds true for little boys. I believe that's one of my do-not-cross lines, no compromise.
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  #16  
March 6th, 2013, 06:43 AM
drewbears's Avatar Mom to 8 AWESOME kids!
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When its your own, its so much different!

I will say boys are SO much easier than girls though LOL
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  #17  
March 6th, 2013, 12:35 PM
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Join Date: May 2005
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Yes, my three boys are easier than my one girl. It's the drama/emotions that are trying. But there's so many fun things too... I'm glad we have one
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