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Forum: Interracial Families

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  #1  
November 10th, 2010, 10:52 AM
Zoostergirl's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Pennsylvania
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Hi, I'm Jess.

DH and I are both Caucasian but we have a five year old adopted daughter who is bi-racial. We've also fostered many, many children of hispanic and AA heritage.

We want to adopt again and are wondering how important it will be for our daughter to have another child in our family who isn't Caucasian. Should we specify that we are only open to other races? What do you think?
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  #2  
November 10th, 2010, 04:53 PM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
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Have you spoken to your daughter? If she really wants a sibling who is biracial like she is, then I see no problem requesting that to adoption agency.
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  #3  
November 10th, 2010, 05:45 PM
Zoostergirl's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by K.A.T View Post
Have you spoken to your daughter? If she really wants a sibling who is biracial like she is, then I see no problem requesting that to adoption agency.
Yes, we have spoken to her and she does want another "dark skinned" person in our family. Her words. The trick is that we are hoping to adopt through foster care and there aren't many children in our age range at all who are free for adoption. I just don't know if I could say 'no' if we were called with a great situation, but just not the race we were hoping for. I don't know how much weight to give her request.
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  #4  
November 10th, 2010, 06:45 PM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
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I say a good faith effort is enough weight. Maybe once the foster child is in the house she won't care if the child is dark skinned or not. Whatever happens I hope it works out for the best. I commend you for adopting, most people won't raise a child that isn't theirs biologically.
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❤ Big Thanks to Vicki, trishosaurus, & Shortcake for the great siggies of my kids! ❤
Liz (36) Kev (35)
Tiana (16) Doni (14) Lil Kev (8) Ethan 7/23/12 Lil Roo 10/29/11



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  #5  
November 11th, 2010, 07:28 PM
belleaz's Avatar Veteran
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Hi jess Im Belle Welcome

to answer ur question I think you could say something about ur request to the agency and if something else works out you tried right.
I dont think its wld end up being a big deal if the other child wasnt "dark skinned" once the child is in the home
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  #6  
November 14th, 2010, 03:38 PM
Zoostergirl's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Thanks ladies for the feedback. We actually took care of a little boy this weekend who was Caucasian. He and Analiese got along great! We talked about how being a good friend and being fun to be around is more important than other factors, including race. I really think she got it.

I'd still love to add to the diversity in our family, but having a good fit personality wise is definitely the most important.
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Last edited by Zoostergirl; November 23rd, 2010 at 06:51 PM. Reason: add a pic
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  #7  
November 14th, 2010, 04:39 PM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
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I'm so glad that they get alone so well. They look great together.
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❤ Big Thanks to Vicki, trishosaurus, & Shortcake for the great siggies of my kids! ❤
Liz (36) Kev (35)
Tiana (16) Doni (14) Lil Kev (8) Ethan 7/23/12 Lil Roo 10/29/11



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  #8  
November 15th, 2010, 07:18 AM
belleaz's Avatar Veteran
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awww theyre adorable!!! Im glad she enjoyed him
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  #9  
November 22nd, 2010, 12:06 AM
Adriana's Mommy's Avatar I <3 my kids
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Hello.. I'm Melissa

I just wanted to say, I think it's wonderful that you adopt. Your such a great person for opening your home to children in need.. ((many hugs)). My grandparents adopted all of their kids, My dad and aunt came from Germany, my other aunt is from Iran, and my Uncle is the only American..

If it was not for my wonderful grandparents, I don't know where I would be today.
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  #10  
November 23rd, 2010, 10:06 AM
missmich
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Hey hey, take the picture down please. I'm not trying to be mean or anything but you really shouldn't be posting pics of foster kids on the net. Your worker may have a problem with that along with the bio parents. I know when I did my foster parent classes they told me not to post pics on line.

As for your DD. Has she given a reason for not wanting another dark skinned family member? Maybe she likes being the only one and wants to remain special?
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  #11  
November 23rd, 2010, 06:50 PM
Zoostergirl's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by missmich View Post
Hey hey, take the picture down please. I'm not trying to be mean or anything but you really shouldn't be posting pics of foster kids on the net. Your worker may have a problem with that along with the bio parents. I know when I did my foster parent classes they told me not to post pics on line.

As for your DD. Has she given a reason for not wanting another dark skinned family member? Maybe she likes being the only one and wants to remain special?

I'll take the pic down, but he's not exactly a foster child. He's adopted by his aunt, who I know and have done respite for before. But you're right, prob safer not to post it even without a name.

She doesn't like feeling the odd one out color-wise. I mean it's not like she complains about it, but a few conversations have really emphasized she would like someone else in our family to 'look different'.
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Last edited by Zoostergirl; November 23rd, 2010 at 06:53 PM.
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  #12  
November 24th, 2010, 07:20 PM
missmich
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oh i misunderstood. i thought she did not want another dark skinned child in the family. i hope that the right little one for your family arrives at the right time! i'm sure your daughter will love them no matter what.
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