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Your own father in the delivery room?


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  #1  
August 5th, 2011, 06:02 AM
Doodlebug06's Avatar Doodlebug
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Ok. So I was on another parenting board and saw a thread about someone who had their own dad in the delivery room watchingvthe birth of his grandchild.

I was sort of nauseated by the thought of my dad seeing my vagina stretch open big enough to squeeze a baby out.

But I also realize that the delivery part isn't usually that long and there's not much gawking time at the actual vagina.

What are your thoughts on this?

Its not for me but I guess I can see others maybe wanting it this way?
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  #2  
August 5th, 2011, 06:10 AM
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Not for this girl!! The only people who will be there are DH, a Doula if I decide to have one and the staff.
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  #3  
August 5th, 2011, 06:16 AM
~Nik*Re~'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I was 16 when I has my first DD and I did want my dad there. He stayed with me through all 16.5 hours and when it was over went to sleep in his truck in the parking lot for a few hours and came back. I didn't mind him being there to support and help me. In fact I couldn't have done it without him. Im a daddy girl always have been always will be. Also had DH, mom, g-ma, aunt there the whole time. Then my step father and uncle were in and out but not at the actual birth.
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Last edited by ~Nik*Re~; August 5th, 2011 at 06:19 AM.
  #4  
August 5th, 2011, 06:16 AM
marinewife0702's Avatar proud first time mama
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My dad I think would want to be in the room but not down by the action. If he is going to be down here for when the baby is born, I think i'll have him stay in the waiting room. My parents are divorced and I think if I had my dad with my mom in the room there would be drama....so its just going to be me and my husband...until he passes out, then me and my mom lol.
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  #5  
August 5th, 2011, 06:28 AM
JTsquared's Avatar Co-Host of Feb 2012 PR
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I think it would be okay as long as he wasn't "down there". Like you said, the actual delivery is just a small portion of the time you spend in labor. That being said, my dad probably won't be in the room (although I'm sure he wants to be!)
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  #6  
August 5th, 2011, 06:35 AM
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Even if I had a relationship with my dad...he would absolutely not be allowed in the room...creeps me out...but that's just me.
  #7  
August 5th, 2011, 06:57 AM
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Yeah I'd probably say him being by my head would be a lot less uncomfortable. But then again I'm also not very close to my dad.

My step dad though. We are pretty close.
I'd be ok with him just being there by the head if the bed maybe? Just so he could see the baby take it's first breath and all that. He has no kids and he's more of a dad to me than my own dad. So I think that would be a special thing for him to be involved with. I've never thought of it till now though.
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  #8  
August 5th, 2011, 07:01 AM
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I figure he saw the birth of a couple of his own children, not necessary to see the grandchildren, lol. It won't be happening here, but then again I wasn't comfortable with my mom either.
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  #9  
August 5th, 2011, 07:11 AM
Doodlebug06's Avatar Doodlebug
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Quote:
Originally Posted by themorethemerrier View Post
I figure he saw the birth of a couple of his own children, not necessary to see the grandchildren, lol. It won't be happening here, but then again I wasn't comfortable with my mom either.
Yeah My mom has been there for all 3 births. (one still born)
She always did my Lamaze classes w me too. So she kinda knew how to help me.
I was able to have natural child birth each time. Which was awesome. And I had no tears or birthing complications. I think my mom was a big part of that.

The one time my exh went to Lamaze w me...he cracked a joke and started laughing when they discussed oiling up the vagina to prepare for stretching.
I was mortified. Lol. I had my mom w me going forward.

Man I have to wonder how my births would have been without my mom there. Lord only knows! Lol
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  #10  
August 5th, 2011, 07:29 AM
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My dad lives out of state but I wouldnt have him in the room. I would be ok with it until I started pushing then he would have to go in waiting room
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  #11  
August 5th, 2011, 08:39 AM
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If I have a homebirth (which I am still considering) I won't mind if my dad is around the house. We will be living with him by then actually so he will more than likely be there. But a hospital room seems so much more confined, I don't think I'd want him there. just DH. I'm more comfortable with my dad than my mom though. I definatley don't want my mom there. she can be in the waiting room, but not in the room with me.
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  #12  
August 5th, 2011, 10:23 AM
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I feel like I don't want my dad to feel left out of the experience, because my mom will be in the room. But I don't think he'd want to see too much and I dot want him to either lol.
  #13  
August 5th, 2011, 10:28 AM
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I'm a total daddy's girl, but I can't imagine him in the delivery room. Luckily, with a c-section, I don't have to make any decisions about who can stay. My dad and mom came in about 12 hours after they induced me. Every time I had a contraction, or looked the least bit uncomfortable, he looked so upset and concerned. He definitely doesn't like to see me in pain. So for that reason alone, I'd say no. It's more about his comfort than my own.
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  #14  
August 5th, 2011, 10:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kangaroo View Post
Ok. So I was on another parenting board and saw a thread about someone who had their own dad in the delivery room watchingvthe birth of his grandchild.

I was sort of nauseated by the thought of my dad seeing my vagina stretch open big enough to squeeze a baby out.

But I also realize that the delivery part isn't usually that long and there's not much gawking time at the actual vagina.

What are your thoughts on this?

Its not for me but I guess I can see others maybe wanting it this way?
It's a highly personal decision and should be made by the parents of the child.

However, statements like the bolded are inappropraite for this kind of discussion. You may be new on FEB 2012 DDC, but you are not new to the boards. Your statement could be highly offensive to some of the women here. I suggest you re-think your posts and read your words carefully before posting.
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  #15  
August 5th, 2011, 11:19 AM
Spyctre's Avatar Arwen
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It's personally not for me. Not for my dad either. He refused to be in the room when his own children were born.
  #16  
August 5th, 2011, 11:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnotherGoAround View Post
It's a highly personal decision and should be made by the parents of the child.

However, statements like the bolded are inappropraite for this kind of discussion. You may be new on FEB 2012 DDC, but you are not new to the boards. Your statement could be highly offensive to some of the women here. I suggest you re-think your posts and read your words carefully before posting.

Well I for one was NOT offended! I actually chuckled a little when I read it!

My dad came in and out of the room while I was in labor but my husband and I had strict feelings that anytime I was being checked or pushing we wanted the privacy of just us. I think it is more common for moms to be allowed in the room more than dads. I for one dont want my dad seeing any bit of my hooha! Just seems nasty to me...


Oh wait is Hooha offensive? Maybe I should rething being on this board if we cant be candid!
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  #17  
August 5th, 2011, 11:25 AM
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There is no way I would have my dad in te room it would just make me feel too uncomftorable even if he was no where near down there.
That being said I am a very private person and alot of people got upset the last time because the only person I would let in was my so, luckily I will have a scheduled c section this time so I don't have to go through that drama again
  #18  
August 5th, 2011, 11:37 AM
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I am not close with my dad, but either way, I would not have him in the room! DH and I like just us two - very quiet and intimate!
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  #19  
August 5th, 2011, 11:51 AM
Doodlebug06's Avatar Doodlebug
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Thinking back to when my first baby was born, he was born at 24 weeks and had passed away. The delivery happened so quick I honestly can't recall who was in the room. I do recall my dad and all my family being in the room while they worked on the baby. I was pretty young. 16. So it's possible he may have been in the room.

Just to avoid offending anyone, when I say it nauseated ME to think of my dad being there, that was a personal statement about my OWN feelings.
As I also said I can understand how others might want their dad there.
Its a personal choice no matter who you select to have in the room. As for ME though, since I'm not close to my dad, it wouldn't be my choice to do that and it does somewhat gross me out to think of my dad seeing my 28 year old vagina passing a baby. I respect Everyones choice/decision.
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  #20  
August 5th, 2011, 11:55 AM
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Kangaroo, to be honest, your statement made me laugh out loud which doesn't happen very often! For what it's worth, it did not offend me what so ever!
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