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December 10th, 2011, 01:30 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 1,128
I am not and have never been sold on my obgyn office. I spoke to a highly reccomended doula and other mommas who have similar birth beliefs. All suggested a practice about an hour away. Its a practice that owns a birth center (2nd in the state from what I understand), but also birth at the hospital. It's 1 obgyn and 2 midwives. I feel like I'd get the care and birth I need and want. I won't have to fight. Hell, one lady I know delivered on the floor because that's what she wanted!

I bring this up with dh (changing practices) and he's pissed. I understand its a drive. And a long one. He doesn't want to consider. I'm upset. My whole pg with dd he got his way. He didn't want to change doctors midway so I didn't. He wanted an induction due to scare tactics. Even little things like freaking nursery theme. All I want is to birth my way and be supported. He doesn't want to hear about a doula (didn't have one last time and everything was fine...) and he doesn't want to hear about how I am unhappy with dd's birth (in his eyes me being upset means I'm not thankful she's here and safe). The thing is all that "trauma" with dd shouldn't have happened. It was because everyone else was pushing her to come before her time and hospital staff/doctors worried about being sued.

This new practice the birth stories are all amazing. My baby and I will be respected. I have faith I won't feel violated or lied too or anything. I know with my current obgyn it will be a repeat of dd's birth and I dont want to do that again.

I don't know how to explain to dh...this time it's not about him. It's about me and this baby. Thats it. This is our last baby and we've been through hell. I want to feeaking enjoy it. I want my baby born in peace. And since I brought it up, he has been acting all pms-like and angry.

I love my daughter, and so glad she's here and safe. But her birth caused additional strain that wasn't neccesary for her! Since she is daddy's princess I feel like admitting that means dh didn't protect his princess.
Mommy to H (6) and E (brand new)
4 Angels gone too soon

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December 10th, 2011, 04:15 PM
txmumx4's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: United States
Posts: 1,253
I can understand his fears. Most of the fear stems from the unknown. Maybe help him learn more about the new choices you want to make and explain more to him why you want this. In the end it is your body and your choice. I hope he can come around with a lil more education and time. xx
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December 10th, 2011, 04:31 PM
therevslady's Avatar Built for Birth
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Atlanta, Ga
Posts: 6,194
Wow- I have no idea how I'd react. My husband cares so little about what doctor I see. He didn't want a doula, but was glad after the fact because I had one anyways. I do what I want when it comes to birth. I don't run it by him at all. I seriously don't know what I'd do if he didn't like my choices. I guess if he's read as much as I have about the topic and done as much research as I have, I'd listen to his opinions. But since I know that will never happen. It's my uterus and my experience- so I'll choose what's best.
Previously known as ~~Que~~

Student Midwife, Doula, Placenta Specialist, and Lactation Counselor
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