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December 23rd, 2011, 09:55 AM
PIP's Avatar
PIP PIP is offline
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or four year olds. My son is four and he still naps. His naps are about 1.5 to 2 hrs long. When he naps I put him to bed around 9:30, if he doesn't nap it's around 8ish. When he doesn't nap he sleeps 11 hours an night. Well anyway, when he naps he doesn't fall asleep until 10:30-11:30. Which drives me crazy. And yesterday he wanted to bunk with me and was talking, shuffling, and I tried to convince him to go back to his bed. Finally at 12am..12AM..HE SAID HE WANTED TO GO BACK TO HIS BED. It's rare that he falls asleep that late. It's usually before 11 or 11ish.

My question: should I stop napping him? Does it sound like he doesn't need naps anymore, even though he takes them and for a while? I don't know what to do.

Any advice??
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December 23rd, 2011, 10:20 AM
*Jillian*'s Avatar Baby #3 on the way
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I'd put a steady bedtime routine in place that you adhere to every single night. You set the plan and he will follow, even if it takes a week to get it in place. If you start putting him to bed at 8 and he gets his 11 or 12 hours he might not want the nap anymore.

I'm a big believer in bedtime routines. It helps them know what to expect.

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December 23rd, 2011, 10:21 AM
melissalaw's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I would probably try to cut out the naps and just put him to bed earlier. If he's not going to bed until really late, he may not need naps. My 2 year old still naps but he goes to bed at 8:30 and sleeps until 7:00 and then naps for 2 hours, so I will let him nap until the nights get hard then I will see about cutting them out.

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December 23rd, 2011, 10:28 AM
.:fearless:.'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Julian is almost 4 and if we are in the car in the evening he will nap. If he does, then he doesn't go to bed till late. There does come a point when they don't need them anymore and your little guy sounds like it. It'll be rough until he gets used to it. I would put him to bed around 730-8 and see how that works for him. Good luck
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December 23rd, 2011, 10:33 AM
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I do have a routine for him. That's his routine. I've always been real strict about his napping and bed time. I'm afraid to stop his naps or cut down cause he might not nap ever again. But falling asleep that late is not acceptable to me either. His needs must be changing. That's my conflict. To give up naps or just sleep longer at night. He usually naps 6 out of 7 days. Oh and like I said in my first post, he wanted to bunk with me, well he never asks to sleep with me...weird. And now he's always asking what I'm doing and if I'm sleeping in my bed. And proceeds to tell me I"m tired so I should go to bed now. I think he just wants to be up with us and is not tired enough. On the other hand he's never given me problem with bedtime or naptime.

Maybe I should try cutting his naps.
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December 23rd, 2011, 10:38 AM
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oh gosh, my child does not nap unless its a quicky nap in the car. you're lucky! but maybe not so much... considering you've got him up later at night. i couldn't do that, i need down time, myself.

sky's bed time is 8 o clock. we start her bed routine at 7. earlier if she's seems tired. so its quiet time, during that hour. she's allowed to read, do a puzzle have a bath. but come 8 o clock, that child is her bed, lights off and she has a flashight. she's usually out within a few minutes. its really worked well with us, and she'll sleep throughout the night, no issues.
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December 23rd, 2011, 10:49 AM
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I have a son the same age. My advice is to stick to that 8pm bedtime. Be consistent with that. Then, see how he's acting in the afternoon. Is he tired? Wired? That is a sighn of tiredness in children as well. The consistent bedtime is important to their internal clocks. Soon, hell be getting up for preschool or kindergarden and you don't want him sleepy for that. 10pm is really to late for any child regardless of naps. So do the bedtime and then see how he's doing. Id keep the bedtime consistent and then implement quiet time every afternoon. He may not need the sleep, but he does need some down time. We did that with ella until she started school full days this year. After preschool, shed have quiet time on her bed for an hour. She could readher leapster tag book, or look at something quietly, but couldn't get up. If after that hour, she was still awake, then she could come play or help make dinner. Bedtime never changed, and it really helped train her body for a consistent bedtime routine. Now that they are all getting up to get ella to school all day, its nice that they are adjusted and awake at the time they need to get ready for the day. Its hard on bodies when you have to pull them out of bed. So start the consistent routine now. go as you mean to go on, and you won't have to switch it up later!. Our issue is bedwetting and still needing nighttime diapers. Sigh, I don't know what to do about that. So we all have our issues.

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December 23rd, 2011, 10:52 AM
lindsey2000k's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I am having this same issue. If she does not nap I want to pull my hair out around 6pm and it seems like all we do is yell at her until 8:00pm for bed time.
If I do nap her (but 50% of the time she wont take one but I make her stay in her room) then our evenings are more plesent but I put her to bed 8-9 and she will sit in there talking and playing until 10:00-11:00.

Earlier this week she did not fall alseep until 11pm and this was after I went in and yelled at her that it was bed time and she was keeping mommy awake and mommy went to bed at 9:00 and is getting really grumpy now. So she got quite and feel alseep.
3:00am... mommy, Mommy, MOMMY. I go in her room to see what she wanted "Mommy I just want a hug" OMFG Madison SLEEP and I left the room. She played for about 30-45 more minutes and went to sleep.
5:00am she was up playing again.... 6:00 she went back to sleep until 7:30 and then she was up for the day.

I am still using a baby monitor because I have a door lock thing where she is locked in her room. I am a very light sleeper so I just wonder if she is getting up and its normal and most parents dont hear it because they dont use a monitor or if she is just not sleeping? I just dont feel safe with her wondering the house yet, we have very steep steps and she knows how to unlock & open the outside doors if she wants to. Also I know she would come into my room all night long. I feel bad because she is potty trained during the day but I make her wear pull ups because she can not access the bathroom and she keeps asking to wear her undies at night.

Madison has always been a horrible sleeper though. As a small infant I never got naps out of her and she was up and down all night long. About 2 yrs she was still waking me about 3-4 times a night. I had just come to terms I have a bad sleeper on my hands.... but im glad to hear im not alone in this battle.

I am praying this baby likes its sleep.

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December 23rd, 2011, 11:15 AM
*Jillian*'s Avatar Baby #3 on the way
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If the nights where he is up late have anything to do with him being in your room, I would start bedtime in his room. My son doesn't get the choice and when he does sleep with me he will NEVER go to sleep...or it takes a long time. When he is in his room on his normal schedule he goes right to bed with no issue. Point is, he will stay up given the opportunity even if he is tired.

But he hasn't napped in a couple of years. He cut that out early and began sleeping 12 hours at night. And even when he napped, bedtime was always the same time.

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December 23rd, 2011, 12:21 PM
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PIP PIP is offline
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I hope this baby is as good a sleeper as my son. Regardless of the falling asleep too late. He was a great sleeper and always sleeps through the night. For me it's just the falling asleep late and too nap or not too nap because of it. I think me and my husband were spoiled by Thano (my son). At 4 months he was sleeping through the night. So I'm grateful to him.

Jillian-No, he never sleeps with me, unless we're sleeping over at my moms (once every 6 weeks). That's why it was weird when he asked. But truthfully I took his request, because I selfishly wanted to sleep next to him. My son has never been the cuddly type so I wanted his presence. But unfortunately it didn't work out, he drove me mad. But after last night, no more.

Lindsey- I still have monitors in Thanos' room. A video and a regular. I'm addicted to it. I might have to get a separate one for the baby.

My son's napping right now. But I think I'm going to wake him up after an hour. Maybe he just sleeps to long.

Why I've always been so obsessed and adamant about his naps and schedule is because kids need sleep. I believe it's a healthy lifestyle and keeps them from getting sick often. And my son, knock on wood, rarely gets ill.

Yes we all have our issues. Some of my friends childrens' issues are exhausting and mine seem quite miniscule compared to theirs.

I may try the no nap, but I'm a little nervous.

Last edited by PIP; December 23rd, 2011 at 12:26 PM.
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December 23rd, 2011, 12:24 PM
alilangel7's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I am in the same boat with my 3 1/2 year old. If Mckenzie naps, she will never go to bed before 10. People judge me all the time and tell me just to do the normal routine and put her in her bed. Unfortunately they don't live here and really understand what is going on. My mom was the biggest pain in the butt with this. That is until she experienced it herself! She then realized there was NO WAY Mckenzie was going to bed earlier than that.

We try to cut out naps, but since we both work full time, it can sometimes be something we can't control. The sitter makes her take quiet time which sometimes she falls asleep. Also my family and husbands family watches her and on those days we have a 30+ minute drive home and she will often fall asleep then. On the nights that she takes a nap, one of us will stay up late with her or we will just throw her in our bed for the night. When she sleeps with us, she will stay in the bed even if we are sleeping already. I feel safer that way because I don't want her up cruising the house.

I hope you find a solution! Ours isn't ideal, but it works for us. The benefit for her staying up late is that she also wakes up late! Today she didn't get up until 9:15! Love that!

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December 23rd, 2011, 01:16 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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Sounds like he isn't adhering to his routine because he is getting too much sleep during the day. So I would end the naps. Just my 2 cents. Good luck! I am scared of the day when my kid outgrows his naps.
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December 23rd, 2011, 01:25 PM
speechteach42's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I would probably slowly reduce his nap time over a week or so until it's cut out or at least reduced greatly and I would pick a consistent bedtime and stick with it. With that being said, every child/home is different so you may just have to try different things until you come up with what's right for you. I believe I read that around four is a natural time for some kids to start dropping nap.
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December 23rd, 2011, 04:56 PM
lunarmagic's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I don't have an older child, but I've found for Kate that when she starts staying up way too late and just not being tired at bedtime for a significant period of time that it's time to drop a nap.

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December 23rd, 2011, 08:39 PM
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From my personal experience, I would cut out the nap. DS1 was doing the same thing - he'd nap but then he'd be up until late at night. He just has a rest time during the day now while DS2 is sleeping. He sleeps great at night and goes to sleep before 8pm.

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December 24th, 2011, 01:40 AM
disneydiva76's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I would have to agree to cut the naps. My girl will be 3 in a few weeks and she stopped taking naps when she was a little over 2. Yeah I lost my mommy free time and it was a hard adjustment for me, but she wakes up less @ night time. If she des take a nap it's when we are running errands in the car for a short time, but that's not a daily routine or anything.

Does he have activities during the day? Preschool? We keep her active in that sense and she has no want or need for a nap.

We have the issue of daddy hearing her @ night and bringing her into our bed though! So that's my battle lol wanna trade ? Hehe

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December 24th, 2011, 09:09 AM
Mamma J's Avatar Proud Navy Wife & SAHM
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I guess it depends on when he's napping....Aidan will be 4 in March, and he still naps because if he doesn't he gets unbearably cranky by dinnertime. If you're not having problems like that, then it might be best to cut naps all together so he can get to bed at a decent time.

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