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Older sibling guilt..

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  • 1 Post By NYCgirl

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March 19th, 2012, 08:59 AM
JennaBee's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 2,833
I figured it would come closer to the end of the pregnancy or when baby came but it's hitting me hard now. We've had to enroll the girls in daycare/preschool for 2 days a week. It's simply because I am already running into too many appointments and not enough baby sitters. I now see monthly 6 doctors right now. My Endocrinologist, Cardiologist, Diabetes nurse, nutritionist, OB and physical therapy. It has been QUITE a struggle to just get these done and I know as the next few weeks approach it will get worse. My OB will go to bi-weekly and so will my Endo and diabetic nurse. The MFM will see me more frequently soon too and throw in bi-weekly NSTs and Bio-physical ultrasounds. We are a 1 car family and even with help it's barely working right now. I try to plan my appointments on DH's days off but he does not have a set schedule so that is really difficult. I know the best thing for everyone is to have a safe reliable place for the girls to go twice a week. This way I am certain they are cared for and I can focus on getting all the appointments done and making this pregnancy the healthiest I can. DD1 was in daycare when I was preggo with DD2 but DD2 has never been in daycare and I worry how she'll adjust. I feel so awful completely turning their world upside down. As much as I know it is necessary for me and for their stability I still feel super guilty

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March 19th, 2012, 09:51 AM
NYCgirl's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Dublin, Ireland
Posts: 978
Don't feel guilty! I am sure they love playschool. It is good for them to get away a bit too. Plus you can get what you need to do done with less stress. Imagine having to drag them along to all you appointment's. You are lucky you have the option for 2 days in daycare. It is also great you are doing it NOW before the babe comes.

Stop feeling guilty!
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Ryan 18 months.

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March 19th, 2012, 11:48 AM
Repti.Mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 15,641
Rebecca is 4 and she has been crying lately because I wont let her go to school When we go Festival and I put them in the Tot Spot you would think she was going to chuck e cheese or something! I think daycare will be fun for them, more fun than sitting at appointments or not getting to go anywhere at all!

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March 19th, 2012, 03:18 PM
JennaBee's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 2,833
the issue was I was having to bring them with me to all my appointments or have DH take personal days for the u/s and it was wearing on both of us. I need his personal days for delivery and we all leave stressed and upset bringing them all with me and I never felt I did enough for baby. I feel really strongly that when I am at appointments for my kids my attention should be totally focused on that child and the reason why we are there not "DD sit, DD shh , we're almost done, Here's your cup,, share your cheerios." etc etc. I know it is best but I always feel like I'm short changing them by not being able to do it all in stride :/

, ,,,,,,
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March 19th, 2012, 03:29 PM
Blessed Mommy Of 5's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Indiana
Posts: 4,056
I don't think you should feel guilty either!! You have so much on your plate to deal with and it sounds like you are doing an excellent job getting everything done!! I think it is good that you enrolled the girls in preschool twice a week! I bet your girls will love it and adjust wonderfully!! They will probably both think it is loads of fun! I remember when my girls were babies I was worried about very similar issues. It turned out that it was just me who was worried, and my girls actually enjoyed their time in preschool! I was expecting it to be much different!

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March 19th, 2012, 04:46 PM
Kierasmom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 23,763
Don't feel guilty! They'll probably have fun making new friends.

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March 20th, 2012, 09:26 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 591
I agree with the other gals. They will probably enjoy making new friends and playing with the other kids a couple days a week.
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