We pride ourselves on having the friendliest
and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment
for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers.
If you have any problems registering please drop an email to email@example.com.
Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!
I know I had to have posted something about this previously but I dont even remember if i ate breakfast this morning so you'll have to bare with me as I say it again..After my appt on friday..as uneventful as it was I should be excited I know..but honestly..I CAN'T for the life of me get excited about having this baby..All I do is sit and worry about not having enough money or a big enough car or house..we're going to have to move when the baby comes and I don't know where we'll go...I go back and forth from anxiety of having to have this baby and anger at my husband for putting me in this situation(long story there..and i don't want to get into the whole it takes two thing plz)..Ive talked to my doc about how i feel and told him all I do is cry and about the irrational thoughts Ive been having out of nowhere..and the best they can come up with is because it was an unplanned pregnancy It'll take longer to accept it..Ive given up food and all I do is sleep..When I take my shower in the morning my mind goes to places it shouldnt and I just want to escape..Ive considered adoption but my husband won't go for that at all..Ive tried getting back into therapy but because I don't have insurance I can't be seen..Ive lost 8 lbs in less than a week and I feel like the walking dead..No idea what else to do!
... Wow. First off great big hugs, and thank you for sharing your story. I don't have much advice to give you, because I try not to let myself become depressed, even after all that has happened to me.
I am going to be completely honest here: I am practically homeless for the time being, I don't have money, or a car, a job, or a home. But I KNOW everything will be fine. I don't think God would do this to my body if I couldn't handle it. I know you can pull through and do this because I believe it's the only option you have right now, especially if your marriage is going downhill.
I believe that once you hold your baby in your arms, everything will change for the better.
You need to pull yourself up. Not eating isn't healthy for either of you..
I also have nowhere to live at the moment and have been so stressed...so I could not imagine what is goin on with everything else going on for you. I will definitely be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. I do agree that you should really start eating at least a little because it is not healthy for yourself as well as the baby. I wish the doctor would work with you more and not make it seem like it is something your supposed to just get over. Do you have another general physician or someone you can talk with? If you need to talk I am here...I can always give yo my email or something.
I also agree with Caitlyn. I just wanted to say that I think the doctor should be taking your thoughts, feelings, and situation more seriously. I really think you could benefit from talking to a different doctor. Depression is serious and is not something that should be taken so lightly as your doctor seems to be doing. You have mentioned several serious factors concerning depression and you deserve to have them addressed properly. I really think you need to be treated for the underlying cause here, which is certainly depression. It is simply not enough for your doctor to tell you it's because your pregnancy is unplanned and it will just take longer to accept and then offer you no treatment whatsoever as if he has your situation all figured out. In the mean time you and your baby are suffering and that is wrong. Please talk to a different doctor. There must be a doctor in your area with the common sense to offer you treatment.
I am sorry you are feeling bad, Sweetie. I have a history of anxiety attacks myself, so I understand. I do not know how you feel about God, but I can tell you personally, I would not survive one day without Him. My husband has walked out on me because he doesn't want another child. But I have no doubt in my mind that he will return home to where he belongs. I have no job, and no education to go out and get a good job. But I also am not concerned about any of those things, and If you'll allow me to share, I'll tell you why.
Luke 12:22 Jesus is talking to his disciples and he says this:
And Jesus said to his disciples, Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious and troubled about your life, as to what you will have to eat, or about your body, as to what you will have to wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens; for they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn; and yet God feeds them. Of how much more worth are you than the birds!
And which of you by being overly anxious and troubled with cares can add a moment of time to his life? If then you are not able to do such a little thing as that, why are you anxious and troubled with cares about the rest?
29: And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink; nor be of doubtful mind. For all these things do the nations of the world seek after: and your Father knows that you have need of these things.
But rather seek the kingdom of God; and all these things shall be added unto you. Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's pleasure to give you the kingdom."
I also go to these verses to deal with fear:
I sought the Lord, and He answered me, and delivered me from all my fears.
When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears, and rescues them from all their troubles. (Psalm 34:17)
The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear Him; He hears their cry and saves them. (Psalm 145:18-19)
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding ; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6
These are just a few. I read 100's a day to keep me encouraged. Cast your cares and burdens on Him, and He will give you rest. That is the only way I survive, so maybe this will help you. I, in no way meant to offend you, just was hoping to offer some help and hope. My pregnancy was not planned either, and Its very hard. But I do feel God gave us these babies for a reason, that we do not understand yet. We can't see the bigger picture, but He can. I hope you can concentrate on things that are good and pure. Try not to let your mind drift to bad thoughts. When bad thoughts come my way I say "No devil! You're a liar!" "Greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world!" And refuse to entertain any thoughts that are contrary to my faith. Anyway, I'm here for you If you need me. *HUGS*
the best they can come up with is because it was an unplanned pregnancy It'll take longer to accept it
I'm sorry what? That's the best they can come up with? Are they doctors or not? I would simply not accept that from my doctor if I confided to him that I was depressed.
In fact, earlier in my pregnancy I was experiencing some mild depression and was crying ever day. When I told my nurse about it she brought the doctor in to talk to me who insisted I find out if my mother had issues with depression during or post pregnancy and made sure to follow up with me and my next appointment. He thought if I wasn't feeling better by then or if it was getting worse we'd talk about options but my hormones seemed to have balanced out.
My point is if your doctor can't be more helpful you should find another doctor to talk about it with. Just because you are pregnant doesn't mean he should just brush it off as hormones. I would demand your doctor take this seriously, tell him you aren't eating and you are losing weight. He should be concerned about this and the impact it will have on the baby and yourself.
I was so sorry to read about your suffering. I will pray for you. Do you have anyone else you can talk to besides Dh? SOmetimes a deep from the hear pour out can help so much (not at all that I am down playing your feeling depressed) I will pray you feel much relief soon.
__________________ How can there be too many children? That is like saying there are too many flowers. ~ Blessed Mother Teresa
You might need an anti-depressant now I am also shocked your doctor was so dismissive. You are feeling this way due to circumstances but it doesn't have to be this way forever. I'm glad you are talking about it with us but I would say something again to your doctor...you need real help with this, not a brush-off.