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Problems with insomnia and sharing a bed...

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  • 1 Post By curlygirl77
  • 1 Post By InnocentDevil
  • 1 Post By smashley8

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April 22nd, 2012, 11:20 AM
Sigyl's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 199
I am having a major bout of insomnia. Regardless of how much or how little sleep I get the night before, I cannot fall asleep until 3am at the earliest and sometimes as late as 6am. I sleep in small, often interrupted cycles. I wake up to pee, I wake up when my husband tries to cuddle, I wake up when he rolls over, his alarm for work goes off, he grunts/snores, etc. Even if he isn't even on my side of the bed when he makes a sound, I immediately wake up and then have to pee thus making me even more awake for having gotten out of bed.

On several occasions I have made mention of wanting to sleep in the guest room. My husband is not okay with this at all. He said if I slept in the other room he would find someone else to share our big bed with. I know he said it in jest, but I didn't appreciate the comment. He insists on cuddling with me and it doesn't seem to bother him that it keeps me up at night. It isn't good for me or the baby to be poorly and unevenly rested. The only solution I can come up with at this point got immediately shot down with a joke about infidelity. Any thoughts? I don't want this to be a fight, I just want to get in bed and fall asleep!
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April 22nd, 2012, 11:47 AM
curlygirl77's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: The UK
Posts: 1,142
wow he is being very insensitive. pregnancy is tiring enough witout insomnia on top. i feel your pain as i am a bad sleeper at the best of times but during pregnancy my insomnia gets reall bad. i have had good results with unisom and i take prescribed ambien twice a week to catch up on lost sleep so at least two nights out of seven i can look forward to some rest. i say do whatever you need to do to get some good sleep- if that means changing beds, do it. you and the baby are your number one priority and that should be your husband's priority too! it's only a few more months and then he will be able to snuggle you again
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April 22nd, 2012, 01:02 PM
InnocentDevil's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 611
Mine is a cuddler too.. I am not., especially right now! LOL. I also wake up every hour to pee, the change positions, when one of my dogs snores, etc. I definitely feel you!! Maybe tell him you love him, but you need to get some sleep. Tell him you'll sleep in the guest room a couple nihgts a week, but not every night??
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April 23rd, 2012, 05:36 AM
Sigyl's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 199
It's 8:31 am and I. AM. STILL. AWAKE...

I think I was dozing here and there but I was definitely aware of being awake. Instead of my usual silence at my every frustration, I would voice it out loud. Sometimes it woke my husband up, sometimes it didn't. But I think he might have a better understanding of my situation after I announced every time he flopped onto me, snored, farted loudly, stole my pillow, etc.

It's not entirely his fault. I feel like a whale flopping around every time I try to roll over. My headaches make finding a comfortable position difficult and the stupid song birds start trilling at the crack of dawn. I get songs stuck in my head and movie quotes and other nonsense that keeps replaying in my mind. I think it would be better for both of us for me to spend some time in the guest room, but I don't think it would solve anything 100%...
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April 23rd, 2012, 06:50 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 4,065
I think you should sleep in the guest room or send him in it...tell him you are being serious, you NEED your sleep, and pregnancy isn't forever.
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April 23rd, 2012, 10:20 AM
RunningMommyTo5's Avatar Marathoning Mom to 4!
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Georgia
Posts: 4,443
I agree, one of you needs to sleep in the guest room. If he really isn't understanding, make a deal that you are going to make sure you wake him up every time you wake at night due to him so he can experience it with you, and maybe he'll be more understanding of why you need to sleep. Maybe the compromise suggested is a good one, maybe you can agree on sleeping in the same bed every other night so you know you'll at least have a few good nights of sleep if DH is truly opposed. Also, maybe mentioning it to you dr with DH there and have him hear the dr say this is important and you need to sleep even if it's in a separate room. It's true, this isn't forever.
*~*~ Katie; Mommy to 3 fun-loving boys, one sweet little baby girl, and #5 on the way! *~*~

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April 24th, 2012, 02:45 AM
Sigyl's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 199
We've reached a resolution and he won't fight me on the guest room situation anymore. I think when I started crying out sheer exhaustion and frustration, he understood that I am not simply whining over him hogging the covers. Granted, it's almost 6am and I'm wide awake, but yeah...

I'm calling the OB in the morning just to check in. I've been having a frustrating time with pregnancy and I need the reassurance.
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April 24th, 2012, 04:09 AM
smashley8's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Syracuse, NY
Posts: 1,851
I feel for you girl! I've been sleeping really well lately but when I first got pregnant, I went through a couple weeks where everything was waking me up and I got extremely frustrated and emotional! I'm glad you and DH came up with a resolution. Mine just said the other day "when you get bigger I'm gonna have to sleep in the guest room 'cause you'll be tossin' and turnin' all night!" LOL I won't argue if HE wants to go in there!!
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