Log In Sign Up

What would you do?


Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Like Tree4Likes
  • 2 Post By anna.rose
  • 1 Post By Miss Kelly
  • 1 Post By taatie10

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To 2012 Playroom LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
July 16th, 2012, 07:21 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 831
Hey ladies! I know I don't post her super often but I need some advice for a problem I'm having.

Ok, so I have a friend whom I've known since high school. We've been good friends since then but lately something seems like it's off in our relationship. I've tried to contact her to get together at least three times and I either get no response or minimal response. I don't think there are any issues in her life that would keep her distanced.

So, should I ask her what's going on or sever the ties and get on with things?

Thank you so much for your advice! It will help me so much, as this has been bugging me for a long time now.

Rachel
__________________
Rachel:
mommy to Isla (7 1/2), Roma (6), Ruby (3 1/2), Harper (2 1/2), and Liam (1)










Reply With Quote
  #2  
July 16th, 2012, 07:28 PM
anna.rose's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 2,064
Confront her first and then cut ties. Don't attack her and definitely tell her you're feeling a little sad that your relationship doesn't seem as strong as it once was and ask if there's something you can do to remedy it. Give it some time after that and then leave the ball in her court. If she doesn't put forth any extra effort just sever ties.
Twist and Gripstress like this.
__________________
Anna



Thanks to *Kiliki* for my beautiful siggy!
Reply With Quote
  #3  
July 16th, 2012, 07:37 PM
Miss Kelly's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,036
I would absolutely ask first! It'll be an awkward conversation but a long term friendship is worth a few tense moments! Who knows, it could just be crazy busy life. Good luck.
Gripstress likes this.
__________________
Kelly
Proud wife to Zach
& Mommy to Victoria Rose December 10, 2012

Reply With Quote
  #4  
July 16th, 2012, 11:49 PM
taatie10's Avatar New Mommy & Pro Auntee
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Northern AZ
Posts: 4,313
I would ask her whats going on, or if there is something going on. Depending on the answer then just give her space or cut the ties.

I've have a friend for years, she goes through weird phases where she doesnt seem to want anything to do with me so I let her be and she gets in contact with me when she wants.
Gripstress likes this.
__________________

Thank you *JMC1988* for the perfect siggy
Reply With Quote
  #5  
July 17th, 2012, 06:43 AM
Cassie.S's Avatar Sophia's Mommy!
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Illinois
Posts: 7,976
Yep, I would talk to her and see what's going on.
__________________



Cassie, wife to Andrew, mommy to Sophia and expecting baby #2 in February!

{Our family blog}



Reply With Quote
  #6  
July 17th, 2012, 12:30 PM
MarlowesMum's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 2,397
It really depends on your particular relationship. If she's a really good friend, I say broach the subject. I had to do this with a HS friend at one point too because I was feeling very hurt. So without anger, I emailed her and said that I wasn't sure if she had an issue with me, or if I had missed something, but that I felt like she was purposefully distancing herself and that I needed to know if I had somehow hurt her feelings. She was extremely apologetic and fell all over herself to make sure I knew it wasn't me. After that, her loner proclivities didn't affect me as much; I had made it known that I still wanted to be in contact with her, and that was all that I could do.

I have other friends that I have essentially written off as just not worth my time anymore. There are some people who NEED to stay in contact (like me, for instance) - and others who don't. Figuring out who belongs in which group goes a long way towards making your peace with those people who don't have the same sensitivities as yourself. When you are of the former group, at some point you make the realization that YOU have to be the one to maintain most contacts, otherwise it just won't happen. If you can live without the person - then you lose touch. If you really truly want them in your life, then you have to make peace with the fact that it will probably always be you that initiates contact.
__________________
Maggie - Mommy to Marlowe & Willamina


Last edited by MarlowesMum; July 17th, 2012 at 12:32 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
July 17th, 2012, 12:50 PM
Gripstress's Avatar GothMom
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Tulare, CA
Posts: 2,313
Agreed with all above...Give her a chance first and then the ball is in her court. Sometimes life gets tough and you get busy. I have a bad habit of not keeping constant contact and I think I hurt people by accident. Some people need more contact than others... I also get depressed and withdraw alot but it's not a reflection of anyone but me. I'd just ask and give her a shot.
__________________
Rebecca
Wife of 18 years to Anthony
Mommy to 4 daughters Elinore 05/27/95,
Phoenix 12/14/01, Pascale 06/03/05
& baby Wren on 12/10/12


Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 11:45 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0