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  #1  
September 1st, 2012, 12:51 PM
LindseyF's Avatar Expecting 2nd Dec Baby!
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Location: North Carolina
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Sorry, gals. I never shy away from seeking advice when I need it, even when it is super personal. I've been in the med field for too long to shy away from many things. So, anyways, answer only if you feel comfortable

For those of you who don't reach the big O easily, how do you help achieve it? Or do you just "deal" with not reaching it most of the time?
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  #2  
September 1st, 2012, 01:07 PM
ash29nc's Avatar Super Mommy
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Location: reidsville nc
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I need oral stimulation lol if u know what I mean
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  #3  
September 1st, 2012, 01:53 PM
Blcooper32's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Tulsa OK
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me too ash. lol and my dh knows it so thats usually how things get started... lots of foreplay too just to make sure its ready to go...but i dont have any trouble when pregnant.
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  #4  
September 1st, 2012, 04:55 PM
The Truth is out There
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Location: Texas
Posts: 1,615
Vibrator. It's the one thing that helps me reach it as quickly as he reaches his... It's also the one thing that helps me really get into it, especially right now when it's somewhat painful.

I hope you're able to figure out what would work for you!
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  #5  
September 1st, 2012, 06:24 PM
Gripstress's Avatar GothMom
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Location: Tulare, CA
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I am too shy to answer...NOT! lol

I can only "finish" with clitoral stimulation so it's either oral or we will do it in a position where I have access to myself...doggystyle, spooning, etc. Luckily my dh is very giving in that area lol. I married him cuz he's a perv in the bedroom and I like it! I have to say though that during this pregnancy I have not "let" him go down on me because I have felt less comfortable for one reason or another. He has offered many times though!
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  #6  
September 1st, 2012, 06:29 PM
Dhartanya's Avatar Paleo Mommy-to-be
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Location: Delta, BC
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Ive never reached it at all... ever
So Im not much help to this thread
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  #7  
September 1st, 2012, 06:59 PM
Shades of Grey's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Utah
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I wouldnt just deal with it, not without trying all I could think of. I dont think he would accept that either. He can be rather determined on that topic. Ive actually had more trouble while pregnant than not... I think its in my head more than physical. I agree on oral and specific positions. Oral doesnt always get me 'there' but gets it going and close enough that it can be obtainable. Have you tried various positions? Lubes, toys, stimulators?
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  #8  
September 1st, 2012, 07:50 PM
dickersons09's Avatar Expecting #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dhartanya View Post
Ive never reached it at all... ever
So Im not much help to this thread
Right there with ya!
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  #9  
September 1st, 2012, 08:08 PM
Gripstress's Avatar GothMom
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Location: Tulare, CA
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I agree with Ashleigh and it's more in my head too(rather than physical, I believe).

The fact is that there are three basic types of women...those who need clitoral stimulation, those who need vaginal stimulation and those who can go either way, with the occasional exception. For instance, I can only get to climax with clitoral but for the VERY rare one from penetration. None of these ways make you more or less of a woman, it's just how you are made.

As for Meghan and Shannon, you are probably in the clitoral only department. It takes some time to really learn how to get to climax for the first time but usually after the first time, it's much easier It kind of happened to me on "accident" my first time(by myself lol)...it just got more and more intense so I went with it and oh wow! That was something
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  #10  
September 1st, 2012, 08:35 PM
Dhartanya's Avatar Paleo Mommy-to-be
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Location: Delta, BC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gripstress View Post
I agree with Ashleigh and it's more in my head too(rather than physical, I believe).

The fact is that there are three basic types of women...those who need clitoral stimulation, those who need vaginal stimulation and those who can go either way, with the occasional exception. For instance, I can only get to climax with clitoral but for the VERY rare one from penetration. None of these ways make you more or less of a woman, it's just how you are made.

As for Meghan and Shannon, you are probably in the clitoral only department. It takes some time to really learn how to get to climax for the first time but usually after the first time, it's much easier It kind of happened to me on "accident" my first time(by myself lol)...it just got more and more intense so I went with it and oh wow! That was something
.... I must be doing it wrong lol or so is other half lol

Quote:
Originally Posted by dickersons09 View Post
Right there with ya!
Glad I'm not the only one
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  #11  
September 1st, 2012, 08:43 PM
The Truth is out There
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Location: Texas
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I agree with Rebecca.. I'm a clitoral stimulation person. Penetration does nothing for me. It feels good but won't ever get me anywhere.
So I use a vibrator for the "upper area" and that really helps.
DH was upset the first time I mentioned trying it, he really felt that it was his fault that I couldn't O. Poor guy. But now he enjoys using the vibrator, once I explained that it wasn't his fault, I was just made differently.
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  #12  
September 1st, 2012, 08:47 PM
gardenbelle's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I have a hard time reaching climax when I'm postpartum, esp with my last pregnancy. It wasn't until my fertility began to return (I think it was around 13-14 months after I had her)that I was finally able to O again. Maybe it was hormonal? It was hard on my DH, I kept telling him it wasn't him, it was me but he kept taking it personally. As far as dealing or doing things to help me reach it, we would try together and I would try alone, but 30 minutes later, we/I would just give up frustrated. Eventually, I just gave up and figured that we'd revisit the issue again later and just do quickies in the meantime. Finally it happened again while we were out of town for a wedding and I'd had a couple of glasses of wine. IDK if it was the wine, the fact that I was finally having some fertile signs or that we were staying in a VRBO that had a bunch of naked art books all around the bedroom, but something finally clicked.
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  #13  
September 1st, 2012, 10:08 PM
Gripstress's Avatar GothMom
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Meghan...it's not that you or dh are doing anything wrong. Until you get one on your own, he probably won't be able to give you one. It's a time thing sometimes.

Brittany-My dh was upset by it too but once I had one he gave me one immediately and he'd changed nothing of what he was doing. I needed to kind of know what direction to take it mentally & physically before he could do it for me. It's sad when the guy thinks it's him(or vice versa!).

PS Meghan...I'd expect a pm soon lol
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  #14  
September 2nd, 2012, 08:56 AM
tricia_16_'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Ladies who have never had one... have you used a vibrator!? That's what got me my first one!
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  #15  
September 2nd, 2012, 09:09 AM
Dhartanya's Avatar Paleo Mommy-to-be
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Location: Delta, BC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tricia_16_ View Post
Ladies who have never had one... have you used a vibrator!? That's what got me my first one!
Tried a couple different kinds.... Got nothing lol
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  #16  
September 2nd, 2012, 11:07 AM
anna.rose's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 2,064
Oh lord.. Vibrator and a bullet. Wham, bam, thank you mam! I didn't have issues with reaching an O during, but trust me... They are AWESOME.
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  #17  
September 2nd, 2012, 01:36 PM
Gripstress's Avatar GothMom
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Location: Tulare, CA
Posts: 2,313
lol Anna...you are funny. The bullets are amazing lil things. I'm not sure it would have done it for me my first time though...it was kind of a right place, right time and no issues after that again(unless on certain meds and MAN is that frustrating!).

I had my first O about 6-8 months after I had my first daughter...so I was 18. But I'm a perv who plays with herself alot...always have lol
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Phoenix 12/14/01, Pascale 06/03/05
& baby Wren on 12/10/12


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  #18  
September 2nd, 2012, 02:55 PM
lilemma86's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Posts: 1,101
I too have a couple vibrators and can we say massage shower head?!?! I have a vibrator called the thumbs up (nothing nasty) from I think a passion party and it is great! I am a clitoral stimulation person also and thankfully the dh is more than happy . I have been pretty active about the past month and a half or so. More so in the rnornings than night time.

I am usually not a nipple person but with the increased sensation sometimes rubbing them just helps a little before hand . Hope it helps!
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  #19  
September 2nd, 2012, 05:58 PM
Gripstress's Avatar GothMom
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Tulare, CA
Posts: 2,313
adamandeve.com is a great place to buy stuff. So cheap and they always throw in freebees and make sure you find a coupon code first because they are everywhere! Howard Stern always had codes for that site but there are alot of different ones. And yeah, I'm a showerhead girl too lol

Careful with the nipple stimulation while pg...can give you cx or bh...
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Wife of 18 years to Anthony
Mommy to 4 daughters Elinore 05/27/95,
Phoenix 12/14/01, Pascale 06/03/05
& baby Wren on 12/10/12


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  #20  
September 2nd, 2012, 07:46 PM
LindseyF's Avatar Expecting 2nd Dec Baby!
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 631
So I had no drive whatsoever after having DS until last month & now it's insane. Problem is DH won't do oral while I'm pregnant cuz it's just 'too weird' for him. And now that my belly's so big, I can't really blame the guy. Anyways, I've never equated toys with DTD (more like for DYI projects) but I'm tired of being left high 'n dry (or not so much) So I'm trying to get outta my comfort zone & really need advice.

Yup, I'm goin' there, ladies. For those brazen enough to answer ... Ideas on how to accomplish the whole penetration AND clitoral stimulation at the same time? So far it's 1) doggy style 2) spooning (thanks Gripstress) What else? And how long do y'all typically take to O ... I feel like I take forever, which is typically why I just throw in the towel while DTD
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