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To the moms who have struggled or are struggling with breastfeeding...

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  • 2 Post By therevslady
  • 6 Post By georgiabrit
  • 3 Post By K.A.T
  • 2 Post By afwifey09
  • 2 Post By Hopefulpinkangel
  • 2 Post By Sherry777
  • 6 Post By therevslady
  • 1 Post By Carwen*Angel

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September 13th, 2012, 07:12 AM
therevslady's Avatar Built for Birth
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Atlanta, Ga
Posts: 6,194
Grab a tissue.

To all the mothers who struggled with breastfeeding | Confessions of a Dr. Mom
Previously known as ~~Que~~

Student Midwife, Doula, Placenta Specialist, and Lactation Counselor
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September 13th, 2012, 08:02 AM
Carwen*Angel's Avatar Fly away on my zephyr
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Location: Manchester, UK
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Lovely find.

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September 13th, 2012, 08:13 AM
magz88's Avatar First Time Mum
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 3,411
That was good to listen to.

Theo is only gaining super slowly and we still have to supplement with formula. Its been a really stressful morning cuz I feel like failure. We had him weighed and he gained only 25 g in 9 days. The doctor assured me he is fine but I wish he would gain more and just get it from me only.
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September 14th, 2012, 06:47 AM
georgiabrit's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Canton, GA
Posts: 516
Great video.
Even now, if i pull out a bottle in public i wonder who is silently condemning me for not nursing my daughter... even if it's a bottle of expressed milk. It's so silly to dwell on the guilt and the sense of failure when there should be none at all, yet even now with my third child, i still get those feelings. I only give Josie about 6oz of formula maximum in a day, and she doesn't usually finish those bottles. The rest she gets from me. The formula is enough to take the strain off us both, and make nursing much more satisfying and stress-free... breastfeeding is awesome, but it can also be so very painful and challenging for some... every Mom who has the intention to provide milk for their child is amazing, whether they feed for 3 days or 3 years, in my opinion.

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September 14th, 2012, 08:34 AM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NYC
Posts: 13,499
That had me in tears. I reminded me how wonderful it is that I can really do this for once. It makes me want to fight harder to keep on bf'n no matter who says what. It also reminds me that no matter when I do stop, I would have made it that far and that's something I've never been able to accomplish before.

❤ Big Thanks to Vicki, trishosaurus, & Shortcake for the great siggies of my kids! ❤
Liz (36) Kev (35)
Tiana (16) Doni (14) Lil Kev (8) Ethan 7/23/12 Lil Roo 10/29/11

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September 14th, 2012, 10:02 AM
afwifey09's Avatar proud momma to Ava Kay
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Mountain Home AFB, Idaho
Posts: 2,372
I think I cried through most of that video. I haven't said anything here because like Polly said, it feels like people (here included) can be rather harsh on those that formula feed. Not to mention it still kills me to have had to switch. Ava and I had a rough go of it, we sat crying together for hours two nights in a row before I realized bfing wasn't working for us. What hurts the most is that I was producing, but due to unfortunate past choices, there were hurdles with latching that we couldn't overcome and lumps in my boobs that were getting progressively worse. Feeling like a failure is an understatement when its my own fault, but watching that video helped a lot. Thanks, Que.
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September 14th, 2012, 11:26 AM
Mom2JDub's Avatar (formerly junie22)
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: California
Posts: 11,271
Yep, definitely brought on the water works. I've had some struggles with breastfeeding and feeling like I'm doing something wrong or failing him because my nipples hurt so bad. I'm so glad I've stuck with it, even though it has meant pumping for a time and bottle feeding while my nipples heal. And I had to supplement with formula for some bottles because I couldn't pump enough to meet his demand. He's now back on my breast, and I'm pumping 50/50. And it feels great that he's getting that nurturing from me. As I type this, he's asleep on the Boppy in front of my breast after feeding. I love him so much.

Last edited by Mom2JDub; September 14th, 2012 at 11:28 AM.
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September 14th, 2012, 01:07 PM
Jessimaaka's Avatar Pink in a house of Blue
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 16,567
Loved this. I know several women who planned to breastfeed and could not and how traumatic it was for them...I'm glad there's things out there like this to remind them they are not a freak or a failure, etc. I'll be passing this on to them...TFS!
DS1: C 8/12/2012
DS2: L 3/30/2014
Surprise baby! due 3/27/2017

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September 14th, 2012, 03:01 PM
Hopefulpinkangel's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,536
Oh Que I needed this more than you could ever know. I never thought I wouldn't be able to breastfeed, after all I had breastfed my DS for 14 months without any real issues so it should have been no big deal. I was wrong. I struggled, sobbed uncontrollably and felt so broken. I felt like a failure as a mother. I had to come to terms with not being able to breastfeed and really go through a grieving process because if I didn't I would be robbing my daughter of the best me. I realized that not being able to breastfeed doesn't make me love my daughter any less and it doesn't make her love me any less. I'm her mother deep within my soul and not being able to breastfeed doesn't take that away.
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Jan 2010 August 2011

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September 14th, 2012, 04:45 PM
Sherry777's Avatar Blessed Mommy
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Location: Memphis, TN
Posts: 2,360
I cried for *years* (yes, years) after breastfeeding my son. I had to supplement because I didn't nurse enough in the first few days. I felt like an absolute failure for the longest time. I tried every pill, every tea, pumping, but it was too late. I could only build up my supply so much. Even the sitter scoffed at the low amount of milk I brought each day. She pointed out the other breastfeeding mothers brought so much more. I went home that day and wept because I felt so inadequate. It was 6 months before I stopped nursing him. I felt like I had failed because I didn't do things right from the beginning. I vowed that with the next baby, I would move heaven and earth to breastfeed without formula or bottles of expressed milk.

This time I did not sleep for a month. I nursed or pumped every hour the entire time, only leaving the house for brief periods of time. Even with a stash of 200 ounces and not using a bottle or supplementing ever, I still question whether I have really "made it" this time. I am so traumatized from last time.

I had to overcome so much: my areolas are huge, and I had a hard time fitting enough of my breast in her mouth. I would sometimes try for 20 minutes to get her to latch. I would weep and thank God when she did latch and nurse. Also, we struggled with finding the perfect position. We ditched the Bobby and bought a Brest Friend. I also wept and thanked God when I discovered my back no longer hurt, and I was able to sit on the couch for hours with no pain. I also struggled with nipple damage from my pump. I had read to use the most suction while pumping, and I sucked large cracks. I sometimes cried out when nursing Pippa. We discovered Medela cream for that.

It has been an emotional roller coaster. I'm proud, but I am also humble. I go back to work in a week, and I don't know if I will be able to pump enough. I am terrified. At this point, I still weep with joy when I nurse her. It's just a dream fulfilled.
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September 14th, 2012, 04:52 PM
therevslady's Avatar Built for Birth
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Location: Atlanta, Ga
Posts: 6,194
All of your stories are so amazing and show so much of what it is to be a mom and why we should support each other even when we are doing things different than each other. A tribute to mother's love.
Previously known as ~~Que~~

Student Midwife, Doula, Placenta Specialist, and Lactation Counselor

Last edited by therevslady; September 14th, 2012 at 05:17 PM.
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September 15th, 2012, 06:31 AM
Carwen*Angel's Avatar Fly away on my zephyr
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ladies, you are all amazing mothers, who have done your very best for your child, no matter what decisions you've had to make. I had the same latching issues with Michaela that I had with Daniel due to inverted nipples and being ill post-partum (both me and baby, both times), and I am just thankful the midwives and nurses in hospital were more sensible about it this time and suggested using the breast pump before my supply dried up altogether. Daniel got a little bit of colostrum and nothing more before I had to give him formula. It had not been my intention and it really upset me. I lived through the same nights you did, Cassie, both of us crying together. So I am thankful that even though we don't nurse, Michaela still gets 4-5 bottles of my milk per day at 3 weeks old as well as enough formula to satisfy her needs. My supply seems to be beginning to reduce, which is probably due to not nursing - I am aiming to still have her on some breastmilk at 6 weeks, and just keep pumping away and getting up in the night to pump in order to encourage my supply as much as possible. It's better than Daniel got and I am grateful. I am also secure in the knowledge that I couldn't do any more. I've even tried to encourage Daniel to have a cup of my breast milk since he didn't get much when he was a baby lol, but sadly he doesn't really like milk any more and refused. I love both my children so very much.
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September 15th, 2012, 10:32 AM
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 12
I had trouble breastfeeding after my twins was born, it got much better eventually but it still felt so terrible to not be able to feed my babies the first few days..
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